Editor’s Note: So much about marriage. Here’s one thread for all you single ladies. Share your thoughts, problems and questions here. The more the merrier this chain would become. Click here to share.
Here are some from our members:
“I am against dating and pre-marital relationship. We are not supposed to cheat our parents who have a lot of expectations and dreams about us” says archukoratty
“Western society does not believe in the institution of marriage,but we as Indians have a strong culture and strong values that we cherish and should always uphold for our future generations to follow.” says Sunitha and then goes on to add “Some might ask–so are the westerners animals,since they engage in relationship from a very young age and don’t care about anything.Well,that is exactly what is spoiling their culture and their values today.Teenage and pre-marital relationship is everything to them these days that education and proper upbringing are all thrown into trash and is not considered important.That is also the reason why things like cervical cancer and herpes are very common here.Having said all that,we should also applaud a handful of them who still value culture and wait till marriage to have relationship. I would also like to stress here that actually in the West,most parents do not approve of pre-marital relationship. Many children do it on the sly.”
“I was talking to this Canadian girl the other day and this topic of pre-marital relationship came up. She had a different take on this question, which is not the usual cultural difference argument. She mentioned that for girls, the urge starts at the age of about 16. If the average age of marriage for Indian lady is 26, she mentioned that there is a 10 year period in a short life when you have the biological urge and desire to have relationship, but you suppress it in the name of tradition. Is this the right thing? Why restrain yourself for 10 long years from something that you want to do?” is what another member writes.
dingdong, one of our male members, writes in to say “Sure, as a young single male, I’ve had my urges. But human nature is all about control. I saw some comments which said ‘why control’, and I believe that its depends on one’s perspective. If you are a person, who doesn’t mind a one night stand or a fling, then yeah, why control? But if you are a person who wants to engage in a relationship with someone who you really love, then control and wait damn it.”
and here’s a more modern outlook from Ria2006 who says, “I really dont understand why we think we cant accept guys who have had PMS.. My husband did.. he told me upfront.. and I was okay with that.. I mean I dont kno why we want to impose something on people just bcos its our culture.. I dont even agree on that it has been our culture we had our God Ram, who had three mothers.. and then we had Draupadi who had five husbands. So we come from a very diversified culture.. But somewhere in the last few centuries we have become dogmatic. “