What were the best days you ever spent with your MIL?

Poll topic for 14th Oct. 2007 to 20th Oct.

Hello ladies,
So much is talked about the relationship one share with her hubby - the best day spent with hubby, best gift gave by him etc.,
Now it is the time to turn the focus ight on the relationship between MIL ( Mother-in-Law) and DIL ( Daughter-in-Law).

When one gets married and enters the new house, I am sure the happiness and the joy that fills the air is beyond words. during those days I am sure the MIL, DIL relationship should have been great then. ( There might be exceptions, but I am talking about the general view.)

Remember the day when you tell your MIL that you are in the family way, am sure she must have been very warm and pleasant to see her family tree growing.

Don't you remember the festive seasons - Diwali, Navrathri _ when both of you talk a lot and plan for the great event.

In this poll topic I am not going to talk about whether your relationship with MIL is strained or the reasons for it. Rather the topic is about the best days you spent with your MIL.

I am sure this topic is going to appeal to all of us ladies, come and share your views.
Thanks

hi laxmi,

A good one. I have wonderful memories. Initially, I used to not get to do anything in the kitchen, but all planning used to be done. then shopping for the whole family we used to do together. since there was shortage of money when the kids were growing up, she was always happy to have her purse loaded. and we kept her that way till the end..

Cooking after 1-2 years was my domain as she was sick. she will just tell me we will cook this and that. for us diwali means making for both sil's and all the near relatives..so imagine it used to be in buckets....so the planning and cooking used to be done in stages. something special for everybody.

Then after a point it was just calling up a maami and ordering whatever each one liked. like bil likes jhangri, veda laddoo...sil badusha..so everything was ordered. either she will go and give all this to sil's houses.

Infact she was my guru who initiated me into lot of things like slokha, chakras and all. not only that she patiently taught me all the traditions that go with the family. today nobody can say that i am an outsider.....

Nowadays festive season mood does not come..that planning, the festive atmosphere is not there....really miss her.....

Hi All,

The initial days of marriage was surely the best days with my MIL... We were all staying together... And we never had any conflicts between us... My MIL used to do all the cooking as I work and hardly find time to cook for the family... She even used to pack my lunch box for office... How sweet... She used to serve for the entire family and then have her dinner...
She used to stand near gate and see me off to office... Serve me snacks once I return from office...

Its sad that now things have changed...

-Devotee

Hi Laxmi,

I have to say every day that i spend with my MIL is special to me. The best time is in the mornings, when only she and I are up and we sit drinking hot coffee, and talk about the good old days. Her childhood, and early married years and so on.... Just wonderful to hear her memories and makes me happy too.

Vandhana

The best time I had with my MIL was during her visit to Dubai. We insisted on her coming, in spite of her old age and health issues (this is called "Anbu Thollai") We used to go around during the shopping festival. She used to cook her specialities, some of which I learnt from her. My kids enjoyed her company.My MIL would talk to me about her young age, how life has changed, etc.
I can never forget the wonderful three months we had to-gether!!

Regards
USHA

Hi all,
I hav never had a gud time wit my MIL Coz she is always busy with her daughter even today she is like that. Initially i felt bad but now i am used to that.

My Mother in law is no more. We had more misunderstandings during her lifetime mostly created by troublsome sisterinlaw. However Mother in law was a nice person and truly a wonderful and unique human being. Thats how I remember her by. looking back it was more of my immaturity and fault but thank god she is in a better place today and gave her blessings to my family and the biggest blessing in form of dear husband.

We are four DIL's in the family and I was the last addition. My MIL had strained relations with her eldest DIL and would always curse her. The other two were her own relatives, so she was pally pally with them. I had a good time with her for more than a year after my marriage. She loved to cook and I would help her in the kitchen. She would talk non-stop during those kitchen times. But I did not mind lending my ear to her chatter. Things were fine till the second DIL moved in. She happens to be my MIL's brother's daughter too. And she began to spoil things for me. She would do no work and would hate the fact that my MIL would speak good of me for helping her in the kitchen. Anyways, my MIL is no more now.

hello

oru naal pothuma
naan solla inrorunaal pothuma
velaya
patchanama
avar seiya naan solla
inroru naal pothuma.....

almost makes me sing like this..oh how do i list she was more a mother than a mother in lawmy mom and mil went together to temples and gatherings. she searched patiently for a nice hubby for my sis. deepavalis she made sweets and kara stuff throughout the night with a firewood stove and be fresh all again early in the morning ready with sojji idlis and the famous deepavali marunthu...
a day in memory.....she will be up early with coffee decoction ready... say by four thirty wait till i came almost five thirty to have it...! the earlier stages she used to sweep sweep and cook and cook for a whole lot of people. she loved people and loved feeding them... she made sweets to be taken to my brothers nichyathaartham a whole huge box of boondhi laadu...everybody in my moms house used to like her super mysorpak. ...
she used to just gift away saree, utensils anything...all someone has to say is oh how nice and the thing will belong to them...!
while i cooked she packed lunch artistically for my kids...will spoil them with a whole lot of eatables...all ready when they come from school
during her last days......(i cant write this without crying..) when she watched the only serial abhirami...she will call all of us to see it...as soon as it is ready and my sons predicting what to come...will she love the scenes...we always ate together as menfolk went out. and sometimes in the morning she will eat adai...then say sathya i think half is enough come eat it...that is we shared the same plate...oh what a loving mil.....
her last day she got malligai jasmine from opp house....for us...gave away a whole lot of mangos from our garden....had a bath and was discussing with a family friend about how much sugar they consumed for a wedding which took place in our house(quite a few weddings here)and off she went with her head bent over.....she was taking upmav which my co sis hade made....a huge shock for all of us....writing through misty eyes...
i fell sick with menopause and missing her very badly......
i still miss her...
i cannot pen lines for her in a page
i need a life time to write
and a scroll of paper
that doesnt get exhausted.........
sometimes it is good to cry?

sathya

My mil is gone now for 13 years. I am her last dil and my hubby loved her the most and spoilt her (she too had spoilt him and I am suffering now). She had her 2 sons at a very later age and so by the time I came, she was nearly immobile. Over that, hubby would not let her even move, saying that his mother had suffered a lot. I think many men say this when in reality their mother would have had a good time. One astrologer told me that my mil's horoscope was Raja yoga jathakam. He even kept a copy for study.
Well, she was afraid that she will lose her son's attention and made sure that we were not left alone even for a few minutes till her death. It was always complaints and I learnt to keep mum. My fil is still alive and they shared a good relationship.
But when I used to get sick, she used to take up cooking and even brought food to the bed. She let me rest till I was well and never said that I was feining sickness. Another important support was when I did not concieve for nearly 4 years. She never said a harsh word and more than that she supported me and said that it was always late in the family. In that she was a pillar of strength and she never asked me to undergo the rituals usually done for a childless woman.
It was love hate relationship. Even then., she felt at home here and after I came over, she remained with us till last. I took care of her alone while she was in a coma stage for 4 months, with a toddler. The other dils did not even visit her.Even now, I do shrardham as per her wishes, only I do.