Provoked By Cheeniya.....With A Lady In A Room...

My Dear ILites,

My humour post is due only tomorrow, that too in the late evening. I have even got the matter ready, well-alligned and all set to go. And suddenly pops up my Senior’s post, which, I am tempted to call a sweet provocation.


So I started to respond to that thread, but soon the size of my reply grew larger than the leader post. And now I have no other option than to abandon my designated post and instead narrate a parallel experience in my life.

Before I start my juicy explanation I have a question to my learned Senior. Sri, you said the incident is pure fiction. I wish to know which part of the incident is fiction – the long hand of the young woman, or her trying to switch on (or switch off) the light… or…..

Ok, let me tell you my story, which, at the very outset I wish to tell you is not fiction. It later became the fountainhead of fiction; but it in itself is real.

The year was 1995. I was just 28, for the ninth year in a row. I was invited to Yercaud to address the Rotary Youth Leadership Awards Camp, popularly known as RYLA. I reached the place on a hot summer morning. My session was scheduled for the next day. I was having a nice time in the camp with the young boys and girls, drawn from the best colleges in Tamilnadu.

I saw a woman coming towards me. She was my fellow faculty and I have seen her in many such camps. She was about my age. A short, plump, good-looking family woman. I immediately sensed some sadness in her face and enquired about it.

The invitation sent to her mentioned the time of her session at 4:30 PM. But in the time table given to us it was mentioned as 1:30 PM. This lady drove down from Madurai and reached the place by 3 PM well in time for her 4:30 session.

The Camp Organisers not knowing the mistake committed by them, thought that the lady had let her down and arranged some other faculty for her supposed session at 1:30. When this lady walked in, the organisers shouted at her for being such an irresponsible person, letting them down very badly. They did not let her say her part of the story.

The lady was upset. Then I took her copy of the invitation and met the Pilot Faculty of the camp. I argued for her and won the case in her favour. Having come all the way from Madurai, let her be given a chance to address a session to the students, I pleaded.
“No way, all the sessions are now booked. I’ll apologise to her in the open forum, but can’t do anything more than that.”

That was his humane answer. I went to all my fellow trainers who had sessions the next day and begged 20 minutes from each of their sessions. I added my share of 20 minutes and now confronted the Pilot Faculty with the 80 minutes slot I had got for her. He relented. The lady handled an excellent session on Etiquette, which, more than the students I enjoyed.

The trouble started late in the night. We were in the camp site till 10 PM, finished our dinner and walked to our assigned lodging places. Since I was championing the cause of that lady, the organisers thought so many things about us. The bottom line was : I and the lady were booked in the same double room in Sterling Resorts. When I went to my room, she was already there.

“Welcome Sridhar. You know we are going to stay in the same room.”

I was shocked. (Honestly ladies and Sri, please believe me). I told her it was not simply possible.

“Why Sridhar, you don’t believe in me?” she asked.

“I don’t believe in me. So give me half an hour, let me do something about it.”

I went to the reception only to be greeted by an empty desk. There was nobody there. I went back to the room.

“Come on Sridhar, we are not students. We are matured people. I’ll sleep in the reception area. You sleep in the bedroom.”

I was still not convinced. I was to take a session on Creativity the next morning. I applied my own teachings to the situation and was looking for a creative solution.

Soon I got one. I remembered another English Professor from Madurai who had come with his wife.

Somehow I got his room number and knocked his door at that unholy hour.

I told him about my pathetic situation. He joked, “Do you want me to go there and sleep with her?”

“No. But if your wife can sleep in that room, I’ll be with you here.”

His wife was a kind soul known to me.

“I will do that for you, Sridhar. Your wife is a lucky woman.”

With these words she disappeared, leaving me in peace for the night.

I was happy and relieved that I escaped from the jaws of temptation.

But one thing I found out was that my fantasy and imagination are not subject to the same moral boundaries as I am. So I let my imagination run riot and wrote two short stories.


One in Tamil, “Ore Araiyil” which was published in Kumudham. (Those of you ILites who have my Jannal Short Story collection can read this story in that book).


The other was in English, entitled “The Opportunity” in which my imagination ran riot. I got a special word of praise from the editor of Alive which published this story.

I have been wanting to post the story in IL but somehow I was afraid that it may hurt the sensibilities of ILites. Let me gauge your reaction and decide on that soon.

Sri, now, tell me what do you think?

Varalotti

Dear Sri Varalotti,

First and foremost, I believe this story- the operative word here being story.

Second and serious, I think you did a chivalrous deed. And like the Dodo, you belong to an extinct breed of gentlemen who watch out for damsels in distress. Well, I don't have Jannal, I have not read your story in Alive. So, can you post them here?

All said and done, this was a good piece and I am proud to know such a good man like you. in Parthiban Kanavu, the appa character (dunno the actor's name) will reel a dialogue that in his youth, all girls appeared as wives.But in old age, all women appear as his daughters. Men like you make the world go round (not spin madly) , men like you make sure we get our dose of cooling rains (in these days of Agninakshatram),men like you add lustre to IL.

My usual line, I salute you. Well, am now in Kerala, so Lal-salaam Varalotti!

regards
Vidya

Dear Sridhar (Hope I have got the right pronounciation now).....

Hmmm.....really good story........My hubby used ti say that he does not allow any gal other than his wife (that’s me), his mom and sis to sit in his bike pillion……….and this rejection would actually make gals feel bad………and with me it’s the other way round….I have taken my good colleagues with me in my bike….(of course on the condition that I drive my vehicle)……….So as long as both the persons are okey with what they are doing every thing is fine……….and of course I am very proud of my hubby since I cannot tolerate seeing any body else travelling in his bike……..and of course I will continue to follow my style………Actually men like youmake us proud.......So keep it up........ (By the way have heard that men look smarter as they grow older..........probably that tempted the lady??.!!)

Dear Junior,

(I think this is the correct name for you - for being an eternal 28 )

Poor You! Etiquette donned the form of Temptation and Creative Thinking came to the rescue. Very dramatic indeed!! Wonder what she was thinking at that time?

What did Indhu Madam say? And how did you appease her this time - the list must have been quite looooong!

Jokes apart, please post us your imagination in Kumadam and Alive.

Dear Sri
I read the story. I believe you. I want to believe you when you say you were shocked when that 'juicy' suggestion was made to you!
I read the story thrice trying to understand what made you behave the way you did! And I realised it must be your age. Dont we know that young men are unpredictable?
I wonder if your reaction would be the same when you reach my age.
I have heard that chastity is nothing but lack of opportunity and I believe in it as nothing else would explain my own chastity! But this the first ever time that a time-honoured saying has been shred to pieces!
Hats off to you young man!
sri

Dear Vidya,

Now I have started to like the name Sri Varalotti, which reminds me of my given name, my pen-name, my adoptive father and the village he lived in.

Thanks for the lal salutations, though I am a little apprehensive about "lal". Being in a profession which goes hand in hand with capitalists, a profesion whose rawmaterial is capital, lal is a colour, which I do not like in economics or politics; my dress is a different ballgame. (The other day I wore a flashy red shirt, which made my wife comment:"Remember we are going to the station. I am sure someone is going to call you to lift their luggage.")

After accepting the greetings I am a little worried about the stress given to the fact that "story" is the operative part.

After reading your response I started regretting the fact that my post has given an impression to the kind souls here, that I am a goody, goody man. I now have to make it clear, that I am not.

Seeing beautiful women is my most favourite pastime. I have incurred the wrath of my dear wife many times for that. One thing I can say in my defence is that I never hid anything from my wife. I "sight" women even when I am going with my wife. ("Che, intha madiri ticketta kooda vittu vaikka mattela?" is her favourite line.)

When the great teacher Chinamaya said that there might be a few brahmacharis here and there but a person who is a brahmachari at the level of his thoughts is quite rare, I was the one to initiate an applause.

My hobby is collecting pictures of beautiful women. (something I have hidden from my wife to sustain the harmony of our marriage).

I have a Doctor friend who knows me for the past 20 years. He has classified me under the category, "Willing to wound but afraid to strike."

Since you had praised me I just wanted to balance that.

Thanks for the nice words, Vidya.
regards,
Sri Varalotti

Dear AGR,

(You have got the spelling right. About pronunciation I need to hear you say my name before I clear that)

It is very nice of your hubby to refuse to take somebody else in his pillion. That is a virtue especially in chennai because I know there are many people who deliberately drive through the old Mahabalipuram Road and offer gifts to women standing near Tharamani.

On this bike issue I had a problem way back in 1985. My sister had been married for just a few months. At that time neither me nor my brother-in-law had a car. We both had Rajdoot Bikes. (In fact I had one in Madurai and another in Chennai for my official use).

My sister, my bil, a group of her relatives went to the movie Sindhubairavi, second show. As we returned there was a logistics problem - some went by auto, some by bus, and some of us by two wheeler. I was asked to take my sister's sister-in-law in my bike.

I flatly refused. My sister pleaded with me. I said a clear no. This became the talk of our family for some time.

AGR, people think that I am too good. But actually I am only too alert and aware. I do not want to take any chances in that area. One never knows when something can go wrong.

Honestly AGR that lady was never tempted. (My wife is very sure that I can tempt no lady in the world, except her who is obliged to be tempted by me by virtue of our marriage). She took it casually because she had enormous confidence in herself. I took it seriously because I did not have her kind of confidence.

regards,
Sri Varalotti

Dear Chitra,
(Thanks for the Junior epithet; but I would prefer the one sri varalotti (though it's a mouthful) as it links me to my given name, my father and his village)

I have been 28 for the past 21 years. When this story happened I was 28 for 9 years.

I am very sure that the lady had nothing in her mind. I even doubt that she did not consider me a threat to her womanhood.

At the end of the day I dont know whether her invitation to stay in the same room was a good comment on my morals or a bad comment on my looks.
GOK.

I narrated the whole incident to Indhu. One good thing about my wife is that she knows very well that I wont cross the lmits. She is quite irritated that staying within the limits I create maximum problem for her.

I think it was 1986. I was 28 for the first time in my life. I was an active member of the local Rotary Club. Some students from the US visited our Club. I was given the honour of garlanding one of the girl-students.

I tried to give the garland in her hand; but she insisted that I put it on her neck. I refused. Our President was angry.

I went to the mike and told them that before the sacred fire I garlanded the woman who became my wife. Before the same fire I took my marital vows. So I cant digest garlanding another woman.

A senior Member of our club got the garland from me and put it on the girl's neck.

Kumudam's story is one level of imagination. But I do not have the scanned copies now. I think I can post the Alive story. But first I need to get it screened by my moderator, lest I should become the first victim of the newly introduced infractoin system.

Thanks, Chitra
regards,
sri varalotti

Dear Sri,
Thanks for reposing confidence in me. Even now I am analysing my reaction on that fateful night. Why was I shocked? Was it because that I was afraid that I might be tempted to do something hanky panky and the lady might raise hell?

I also love the saying that chastity is a question of opportunity. Since that is one quality in which I do not want to compromise, since that is only one area where I can repay what my wife has given me, I am way too jealous in protecting it. I am fully aware that I might succumb if the opportunity is right. So I run away from such opportunities.

Several years later I met that lady in a Rotary meeting and we had a hearty laught on what happened on the other day. I am very sure that if she had read my stories built around this incident, she might cut all relationship with me.

When I reach your age (which I will do in barely 36 years) how will I be? I cant tell. Let's wait and see.

Thanks for the participation and thanks for the kind words, Sri. Above all thanks for an opportunity to relive some juicy past buried in the corner of my mind.
regards,
sri varalotti

Karppukkarasar Varalottiyarukku
vanakkatthudan vinnappam
Vegum veyyil un-thaanga-ble, ayya
"Pei !" enru podungal order
peyyattum mazhai !

manjula