Will You Let Me Work For You?

I do not think this innocuous question will meet with any opposition from the ILites, of course, except for one.

Compared to titles like Will You Walk With Me?, Will You Come With Me? Will You Be My GF? (and the one which an Ilite suggested in a pm, which I do not want to mention here as I am mortally afraid of infractions especially at the hands of the beautiful moderator assigned to this forum) this is fairly decent.

The one ILite who will furiously oppose this title is… yes, you guessed it, the ILite I am living with, my one and only wife.

‘At home you have not even removed a piece of dust by a millimetre. And now you ask like this in a 20000-strong ladies site. They will think as if you do all the work at home. Only I know that you are the laziest and the lousiest of all.’

I can’t just brush away her charges as baseless. If it is a full-fledged legal case I would rather plead guilty and face the music than pleading innocent and facing a worse type of music.

But honestly, my dear GFs, an incident in the life of Sri Ramanujar made me ask this question. At one level I would love to be so loving, so caring and so egoless like him.

But at another level I know that is mere wishful thinking. It may take a million lifetimes of spiritual growth to come even a mile near the greatest of saints who ever waked on our land.

The ultimate test of humility, the real baptism by fire in the spiritual realm is working for somebody else. Not when there is no choice; but when one is highly educated, well-to-do and enjoys a status in a society and there is no compulsion to work.

In the Srivaishnava tradition kainkaryam or service is considered superior to worship. In one of the sects (the one to which yours truly belongs) when they do the sankalpam (a brief prelude before a prayer or a religious ritual) we do not say “Sri Parameswara preethyartham” (to please Lord Shiva) or “Sriman Naryana Preethyartham” (to please Sriman Narayana) but simply say “Bhagavath kainkarya roopam” (by way of service to God).

Our Acharyas believed that we as mortals cannot do anything to please God. For God is always plesed with us, whether we chant his name throughout the day without taking any food, or indulge in rich food and other sensual pleasures.

SHE is pleased even if we hurt others; for SHE knows very well that we wont be happy by such acts and sooner or later, something would turn up that would make us realise our wrongs, some pain, some shock, all manifestations of her love.

Now coming to the story. My readers often charge me that I write tear jerkers, I make people cry at the end of my story. But if you read Sri Ramanuja’s biography you will be crying throughout. And once you finish reading, you will be crying for the rest of your life, thinking about the love, about the humility of the great saint.

And the tears we shed would be the most powerful germicide available on earth. They would kill the germs of anger, lust and greed and make our hearts pure and germ-free.

 

Ramanjua’s Guru (one of the gurus) was Periya Nambikal. His daughter Nappinnai was married into a rich family. In those days dowry was unheard of. But the bride was expected to bring a horde of servants with her when she walks into her husband’s house.

The other daughters-in-law of the family had brought enough servants; but Perianambikal could not afford even one.

Napinnai’s mother-in-law started to tease the girl about this. At first it was an indirect attack, an innuendo, a sarcastic remark or a seemingly casual accusation. But slowly she got bolder and bolder and started making fun of Nappinnai’s father, Peria Nambikal.

Peria Nambikal was a renowned scholar and was leading a saintly life. The girl could not bear her father being ridiculed by her in-laws. She fought with them and came back to her parents. Her father did not know how to handle the issue.

Ramanujar was almost a father figure to the girl. One day the girl spoke her mind to him and sought his help. At that time Ramanuja had a stature in the town. He was acclaimed as an Acharya and so many people were ready to study under him. He was better known even than his guru Peria Nambikal.

Ramanuja told the girl that he would do something about it. Would she pack up her things and go along with him? The girl thought that Ramanuja was going to talk to her in-laws and advise them not to talk ill of Peria Nambikal.

After a day’s journey the Ramanuja and the girl reached her in-laws place.

Fortunately for Ramanuja, the in-laws did not know about him or his fame. The girl’s mother-in-law asked in a derogatory tone,

“Who are you, old man?”

“I am a slave of Peria Nambikal. He has sent me as Napinnai’s dowry. Will you please let me work for you?”

The girl was shocked. She was about to blurt out who Ramanuja really was. But the great saint signalled to her to keep quiet. The girl ran out of the room, sobbing.
The mother-in-law just grunted her assent.

She made Ramanuja do all the household chores. The great saint, who showed us all the path to God Himself, who showed us the love of God, the great man who propounded the eternal Vishistadvaita Philosophy, the great scholar, who wrote Bhashyam to the Gita and the Upanishads, washed their clothes, cleaned the floor and even removed the leaves on which they had eaten.

Live a million years, will you see another like him?

When we begin chanting Nalayira Divya prabandam we say at the very outset,


“Ramanujasya sharanau sharanam prapathye”
“I take refuge in the feet of Sri Ramanujar.”

Discoursing to a congregation of disciples in Srirangam or doing the dishes in Napinnai’s house was the same for the saint. And that is precisely we need to learn.

We all tend to think that we are born for some great acts and are waiting for some grand finalle in life, while we are endlessly irritated if we have to stand in a queue or walk in the sun. This is the real dichotomy and winning over this is real enlightenment.

There is absolutely no difference between the butcher who kills the sheep and the person who sits in his puja room and chants the verses from the Holy Gita. There is absolutely no qualitative difference per se between writing a book and preparing soup, except for the love and attention you bring to the table.

And the Great Gita does not say, reading Gita is yogam.It thunders for all of us to hear, “Yogam Karmashu Kaushalam” Skill in action in yoga. It does not talk about the nature of the action.

It is not what you do that matters but how do you do it. If some one can show skill in cleaning a toilet, yes, that is yogam, because it is “karmashu kaushalam”. A person reading the upanishads with his mind being somewhere else is in a far worse position than a person who cleans our toilets with skill and dedication.

And legend has it that Ramanuja’s work was not sloppy. He did his work with utmost attention and was eager to learn what he did not know. In about a week’s time the family came to know about Ramanuja. The whole town now turned against the family for making an Acharya do the household chores.

Ultimately the man of the house fell at Ramanuja’s feet, asked his pardon and begged him to relieve them of the sin. He also assured that Napinnai will hence forward be treated with the love she deserved

Ramanuja returned to his Guru’s place as if nothing had happened.

And now go back to the question, read it again and let me know the answer. I will have to warn you though, that I am capable of making a mess of everything that comes my way.

 

Dear Usha,
I am happy that I have brought the life story of a great soul to a good friend of mine. Happier still that you loved it.
Well, please think about the question, madam. And thanks a billion for your second thoughts.

love,