Is this daycare helping in my LOs development mentally?

I don't think that daycare is good. Your baby is only a year old and she already sounds so stressed. Nanny and daycare teachers should have a happy and calm personality. A mother's intuition is mostly right all the time, so if I were you I will look for a new one.

 

I'm suggesting one more option which might be expensive but worth a try.Have taken tours of any preschools in your area. Your LO is at the right age to get started in a preschool in my opinion. My LO was kind of like yours but I did the mistake of keeping him in daycare till 2. I switched him to preschool and he has been doing much better. He still not at par with other kids who have been there since day1..but I must say that his fears and insecurities are vanishing...He is learning to socialize and shows overall development in his personality(including potty training, talking ,etc..)
Regd Food its still a struggle for us every meal. He does not eat anything at school either..But we are hoping this phase will also pass away..
Good luck and hang in there. Think clearly before you make a switch.

 

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Sanjuruby3,
from my perspective:
1. Daycare is not a good option in terms of taking care of the little one as we expect...individual attention, feeding.. and so on. However it helps her to interact with other kids and pick up the language quickly.
2. Indian Nanny would be a good option...
let me know you are from which place...I will give you contacts if possible....Best of luck.


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Dear i feel so sad reading ur post. Don't u have WFH ? Why don't u try that ..she is feeling so much of insecurity i.e why she is clinging you all the time...same thing am facing with my kid my heartaches seeing that i have decided to quit my job . I can't see her like that . I understood only one thing only u can take good care after u grandparents who are responsible ..if not so good daycare

 

You have listed yourself the pros and cons. The benefits of having the nanny back would be a better option for your child.

Your child is not happy. She is never going to learn or pick anything from that daycare. You also seem to be not rested. So better to keep the nanny. Adjust during her vacation. The rest of the days you can be alt least tension free. Focus on your work and also spend your time with your kid without frustration by teaching or showing her things that would want her to pick. For a little child having a happy environment is important than what the daycare would offer.

The daycare that you have put is certainly not a good one. If possible, you can even lodge a complain.

 

Sanjuruby- What were your issues with the nanny? Why did you move her to the daycare? I am just trying to figure out the cons of having the same nanny. If you decided to send your LO to the dayare and terminate the nanny's services, there must have been a reason.
For the daycare, this daycare doesn't sound a good place for your LO. Did you ask for recommendations from friends/ colleagues? How did you choose this place?
Runny nose and snot all over the face is okay because teachers can't keep all the kids clean but standing in cold is not. Snatching a toy is a big no. A good daycare environment will help her get over her insecurities (by 3 months she should be comfortable and thriving). I agree with your husband, try to get her in daycare schedule: let her sit with other kids to eat her breakfast (you can offer something small on your way to the daycare), let her eat lunch that other kids are eating.
Look for a different daycare. Ask people, spend time with teachers before signing your LO up in a new daycare, ask questions and don't stay quiet if something bothers you.
My son was with babysitters for ~18 months. When we moved first time (he was 5 months), I sent him to a daycare but day 2 I realized that was a mistake. This is his third daycare now and he loves it. You can tell when things are not right. Trust your instincts.

 

3 months is a long time for a kid to not adjust to. They normally adjust quickly if they like the place. I believe its better to change the day care and also not to go for the same nanny .

You baby needs more attention now as she is growing up and with a nanny on phone its not going to help her.

I would suggest you to check for other day cares . Some day cares allow kids during open house , why dont u find some like that so that u can take your LO and see how she feels there ?

Also, another thing which I forgot to mention, 1yr is still a young age for day care, why dont u try a registered home based day care ? It will help her adjust to day cares as such

 

As someone else said, kids adapt much sooner than we would. So 3 months is a really long time for your child to feel at home and thrive in a certain place. As someone who once worked in a daycare here in the US, I can tell you that not all daycares are created equal. My vote is for switching back to your old nanny. (unless she was fired for a good reason) regarding stimulation, your nanny will have to step up her game because at this age, it is very important to keep them physically and mentally active. You can sign her up for various programs like toddler music classes etc. I did that with my son and he absolutely loved it. We also did a lot of story times etc at the local library. That way your nanny can just chaffeur your LO and just supervise her. The onus of stimulating the kid will be on someone else. Once she is a bit older, you can also check out the option of sending her to a montessori. In my area, they take in kids starting at the age of 18m and you can pick the all day option. They also assist with potty training. Good luck with whatever you choose.