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STOP labeling our children!!

Discussion in 'Toddlers' started by anika987, Jan 6, 2015.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Autistic/ADHD/ASD/PSD/ADD etc etc etc..so many labels..

    As much as it is important for early intervention..many cases have been wrongly diagonised orclaimed "risk for high autism".

    Milestones do differ from child to child.some may excel in certain skills and some may delay.All in all no two kids can be the same.If a certain milestone has not been reached..the parents are made to feel frustrated and depressed as they immediately feel their dd or dh is autistic.It is good to be aware however,these days it is a bit too much.

    the list which is given cannot be reached by all kids at the same time.Even we adults are slow,sometimes rude and blunt etc(symptoms of autism!) so can we say we are all under the autism syndrome?

    Each child is special and some are slow in some things and some are fast.unless there are extreme symptoms , we should not really segregate or label our child.it is painful.

    Nowadays,to get married is a pain the neck and then conceive itself is a big issueand on top of it,parents are not able to enjoy their children's cuteness.all the time tension.has she reached this milestone,has she spoken,has she pointed etc etc etc..
    things are getting worse.

    sometimes ignorance seems bliss.

    thank god we are in this generation.next generation..the stress level will be super crazy for sure!!

    PLEASE STOP LABELING OUR CHILDREN.THEY ARE SPECIAL GIFTS TO US.
     
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  2. Rakhii

    Rakhii Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Anika, whats going on? Is someone making fun of your child?
     
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  3. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    hi rakhii,

    since a child does not achieve a particular milestone at the particular time,people immediately scare the parents or label a child.Anyways,my thread was intended as support for all parents assure them not to worry but it came out a different way.I feel bad to have hurt the feelings of some parents and would love to have this thread deleted.
     
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  4. NancyErick

    NancyErick New IL'ite

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    interesting thoughts thinkingsmiley
     
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  5. Rakhii

    Rakhii Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Yes! yes! I hear you! Of late every delay in milestone is asked with a question, "is she special". WTH?
     
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  6. sweetypi

    sweetypi Platinum IL'ite

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    Say 'yes, very special, like you, me, your kids' , that shuts them up i found
     
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  7. curiousgals78

    curiousgals78 Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Anika,
    please continue this thread. it is an important topic that needs to be understood properly. its a deep stress on the parents when they know that their children has not reached the milestone and added on top of it doctor advises to go for EI without reassuring the parents that some kids take time to achieve a milestone while some other kids might be developing a different milestone but this on may be late.
    ex: for my son they said he has a speech delay.
    we speak multiple languages and when we mentioned to the doctor about it he simply said but that is not an excuse. he needs to be doing sentences.
    we got alarmed and then spoke with friends and realised some are travelling in the same boat. we got EI and they did couple of different tests and came up a with a result that his OT skills were not up to the mark as well. i can still remember that day. it felt terrible.
    then we could not decide if we should proceed with the next step and after some time decided to go on with speech , ot and DI classes for him. the therapists would come home interact / play nicely with him and he started having a good time.t he therapists were nice and slowly made us to realise this is an enjoyable experience with the child as well as getting them into learning.
    within 2 months we saw lot of difference and now he talks non stop. too much of a pity that this service ends before third birthday
    as parents instead of taking this as a stressful thing if we understand it turns out to be a very helpful /useful to the child.
     
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  8. Susmithavijay

    Susmithavijay Bronze IL'ite

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    Anika,i can understand your frustration. Am 100% sure ur kid doesnt come under any spectrum. And yes stop labeling kids, every kid is different. Some kids like to talk some like to keep quiet. Some to play and some just watch. God we r humans and we have different tendencies. And that is what called as nature. Who the hell told that only a kid who s talkative and cheerful isthe ideal one and the rest are some kind of genres? Whoever it is they r the ones who r having mental retardness.see i really dont believe this autism spectrum thing.i mean i dont know about foreign kids because they have different genetics. But indian kids r not prone to this stuff. Somehow our indian genes r immune to these things. And it is acknowledged by the doctors over here. See our kids can pick these things only through their surroundings. I mean if we have a number of ppl in our home who keeps talking like we do in india and also we interact a lot with ppl or neighbors in India. Thas how kids pick up language or ay other skills. Thats the kind of " wiring" we have in our brains. But here in a different country where we keep ourselves lonely at home, kids wont find anything interesting. Daycares might help but then again they have the same routine so agan they wont find anything interesting. So they keep engaged in playing than talking. U might have heard lot parents telling that their kids started talking only after staying a while in india. So rest assured. Some ppl checking ur kid for an hour and labeling her as ASD means nothing. You definitely cannot tell a kids nature in 1 hour. Her mood can be anything that time. Or perhaps she didnt feel comfortable with strangers. Or for a minute if u really think she has asd, that doesn't mean anything mental illness. It just tells ur kids nature, that she likes more activities than talking, more calming environment than noisy. More disciplined routine than on the go. More focused on what's important than all foolish stuff. Extremely intelligent and she is the contributor to the world and not just another head in a millions.asd means she is one of a kind and unique in a positive way. Thats y they r called special. If u still have any doubts plz talk to me and am very happy to answer.
     
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  9. Swethasri

    Swethasri Platinum IL'ite

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    @anika987 very must topic to discuss and create awareness. people will not only label our kids but also talk all kinds of non-sense to the parents and using their weakness guide them to the so called spiritual gurus. Especially in foreign countries, some indians attitude are so bad that they change everything like dress, eating, ....but not in this one. Very sad. I am so happy that I am not in the rat race and realized that we should keep a 2 arms distance when we meet an Indian here in US. I am not generalizing but some people are so mean which leaves a very bitter tastes end of the day. Just IMO.
     
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  10. Rakhii

    Rakhii Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    This is the first time in my LIFE I am hearing that Indian kids are immune to Autism and that their genetics prevent them from getting autism.
    Is anyone else in the same boat as me? At this rate, it looks like the rest of the world should pack their bags and move to India.

    @Susmithavijay, your post comes across judging every Indian (and otherwise) mom that it's somehow the parents fault that their kids are born with Autism. There is not special "wiring" in Indian kids brains. Just an FYI, there are plenty of kids in India that are born Autistic. It doesn't come because they are born outside India.
    please educate yourself before making such statements.
     
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