Be Prepared For Brickbats As Well!

Dear Queeny,

Thanks for joining me with your fantabulous feed back.

Youre very right Queeny, each have their own pace in life and pushing someone further than what is possible for them would only add a lot of trauma to the kids. The results would definitely be horrifying.

I guess the best is to come to terms with your child's capabilities and act accordingly.

And most important we need to subtly show them to deal with the darker phases of life.

Thanks once again Queeny for joining in.

Love,
Devika

Originally Posted by Arunarc

Dear Poetess
Aptly said your lessons and points that all parents should remember are super.
Yes failure should be taken sportingly, and never force your kid in something that he/she doesn't want to do, give them an opportunity to decide what they want to do.
Even if our kid is average in studies be it, he/she is number one in something else we being parents have to identify that and train them or educate them in that field. Only then we can see our kid in flying colours. As much we prepare them for success we should equally prepare them for failures in life.
Thanks for the tips Devika dear for putting them up here I too have read so much news about the kids now a days as all the results are out and the kids going through so much of pressure, stress becoz of the failure. I really feel sad for them. Why do these parents want so much from their kids.............did the parents go through all this when they were young?? I am sure all the parents had a good time during teens why are today's teens have to face all this pressure when it is the time for them to enjoy and equally think of they future. Today's kids are smarter then us that is what I feel and know exactly what they want in future.

Dear Devika,

A very timely post, considering this case is being discussed in another thread too.
Our IL has many young mothers and I can understand that it is not easy to bring up kids with the right perspective today.
Well, any day, it was not easy! But given the pressures of today, it is tougher I feel.
In my days, if we came home with 75% as our marks, it was considered very good and we were thrilled. But today's norm seems to be in the latter nineties! Is that possible or have the norms just changed?
Pressure to excel should not be placed on our young ones. This can eventually lead to their failure in life.
It was appalling to see Lindsey Lohan's mother and her young fourteen year old sister on the View, promoting their reality show. As if one daughter down in the dumps is not enough? Well, God bless that young girl.
And yes, your post found its way to FP, congrats!

L, Kamla

Dear Kamla,

Thankyou for gracing my thread with your lovely presence.

Yeah this is the need of the hour seeing the queue outside the shrinks trying to get their young ones come to terms with life and its demands that seem to be way beyond the reach of many.
Its very important for everyone to understand where our kids stand in terms of their capabilities and accordingly streamline them to the areas of their interest ,considering the fact that this would be the path they would be treading for the rest of their lives and their happiness lies here.
Also it would help them to learn how to tackle criticism from a young age, expose them to the realitites of life but of course in a subtle manner so that they know that life need not always be a bed of roses and they must be prepared to deal with thorns.

Thankyou once again Kamla for joining in!

Love,
Devika

Originally Posted by Kamla

Dear Devika,

A very timely post, considering this case is being discussed in another thread too.
Our IL has many young mothers and I can understand that it is not easy to bring up kids with the right perspective today.
Well, any day, it was not easy! But given the pressures of today, it is tougher I feel.
In my days, if we came home with 75% as our marks, it was considered very good and we were thrilled. But today's norm seems to be in the latter nineties! Is that possible or have the norms just changed?
Pressure to excel should not be placed on our young ones. This can eventually lead to their failure in life.
It was appalling to see Lindsey Lohan's mother and her young fourteen year old sister on the View, promoting their reality show. As if one daughter down in the dumps is not enough? Well, God bless that young girl.
And yes, your post found its way to FP, congrats!

L, Kamla

Devika,
Sorry for this late fb..
You had brought out what is going on in the parental world..too much comparisons and expectations...leads to this..
First we should learn how to deal with the brickbats we are facing and then let them learn too...
It takes time to understand that failures are the stepping stones to success..

sriniketan

Dear Srini,

Accepting failures has never been easy and to top it the high expectations of parents and others makes it even more difficult.

Yes failures are the stepping stones to success. People should know how to accept failures , especially looking at failures as the end of the road is very harmful to the childs psyche.

After each failure infact the words that there is always a next time gives a ray of hope to the child, each failed attempt should be treated with understanding rqther than contempt.

Infact children should be taught that in the road of life there would be many ups and downs successes and failures and we need to deal with them accordingly.Resorting to measures as inflicting wounds on oneself or suicides are the effect of not being prepared to handle failures.

It has become very essential these days to specially train the children in these areas since ther is so much of competition around.

Thankyou for the FB Srini.

Love,
Devika

Originally Posted by Sriniketan

Devika,
Sorry for this late fb..
You had brought out what is going on in the parental world..too much comparisons and expectations...leads to this..
First we should learn how to deal with the brickbats we are facing and then let them learn too...
It takes time to understand that failures are the stepping stones to success..

sriniketan

Devika!

Great thread! I myself am dealing with a 12 yr. old, and with pressures from grand parents, to push him to do well! God! Its a never ending battle, and at times I wonder who is right and who is wrong! All r too keen to know how each child is doing....sp. in the family....the pressure on the child and parents is just too much... when u hear stuff like, 'u r not pushing the kid enough"!

I am at my tethers end at times, and blow my top! Seriously, its crazy..the expectations....from all sides!