Chenniya Sir / Kamala mam, and Induslady, I address you both, as I am going to post regarding the forum moderated by you.. Chithirainilavu's post is closed for the comment, that is unwarranted ...S ...I whole heartedly accept it...as it hurts our North Indian members...and I luuvv North Indians, for the old tradition & customs followed in many places...with loads of bangles and red sindhoor in forehead and the way they respect people...In a meet, all my sis's team members ( North Indians )seeked the blessings of my pa...and they give great respect for elders...and the married ladies, put the pallu of the saree to forehead, and touch the feet...lovely all...and we cant blame all , for few ppl's act.. So, to avoid bashing , closing the thread is accepted... But why not the dress code thread??? Not for the topic dealt with, but for the comments posted by the OP in her words...Abusive towards a particular woman, stating as husband is on- shore, and her words offended not only me, but many IL s...and they replied too... In another married forum thread, she want to whack the DIL...she have everyright like everyone, to express her views ...But not with comments hurting the other members... I feel, If the thread ( Chithirainilavu ), is closed for the comment hurting North Indians...why not the thread posted, which hurts all Indians and DIL s here?? Pls excuse me and forgive me, if my post hurts you all, Moderators, As I have great respect for the moderators . The Comment in Dress Code Snippet is highly insensible and I felt to post this one, and again sorry, as I dont know , whether this is the correct place to share my views...or else , I request to move the post..to the apt place.... Vasu.....
Dear Vasupradha, Thank you for bringing this to the attention of admin/moderators here. First of all you do not hurt anyone by bringing this up, not even the OP. We take it like it is a suggestion in the best interest of the community and all the members here. Coming to closing the controversial threads on North Indians - may be the moderator of the thread closed to stop the controversies or bashing within the community amongst the North Indian Vs. South Indians. Also, as a site policy we do not accept or allow threads that appear to be racial in nature. Having said that it does not necessarily imply that we have to close dress code thread because it has some unwarranted comments. There is always a "moderation" option. We will moderate and remove unwarranted comments from that thread and inform the poster to be watchful about it. Still that thread on the subject "dress code" can continue to stay there and be discussed without "attacking" any person or community or race in particular. Hope you will agree on moderating and removing the unwarranted comments.
While we are here talking about a few threads started by this member, would like to say about the recent posts in the "Mad(e) for each other" thread in Married life forum. This thread was closed because of bashing comments and direct attacks on the OP. While the OP could have posted some unwarranted comments (about a particular caste, by default the color they inherit, etc.), she has just voiced her opinions on how people with not so matching looks decide to join hands and how the society is viewing (not accepting) it. Everyone who differ with this opinion could have voiced their opinions in a very polite manner. Except a handful, the rest were only posting to bash the OP which was very obvious. Especially those who revived this old thread by posting recently. Let's remind ourselves the DO's and DON'Ts: 1. When you disagree on any post, disagree in a very polite and friendly manner. 2. Disagree with the post and not with the poster. NO GANGING UP against any member will be allowed in IndusLadies. 3. No posting / commenting about any caste / creed / religion. 4. No commenting about the poster like "having been in this profession". 5. No passing any kind of deragatory remarks on any particular individual, especially on a co-member. Note: Vasupradha, this response is just not for you. It is for all the posters in that "made for each other" thread including the OP. I only hope everyone reads this and participates within the Forum Etiquette and Guidelines.
Dear Ilites and the Moderator, I viewed the Comments and the suggestions, and I abide by the moderator's rules for the forum to maintain a decorum.
Indusladies is a place where many women come with their issues. I love the suggestions many give and have been amazed at the level of maturity and the way each issue has been handled. Anyone who comes with an issue is treated well. Even in those cases where the OP is not correct, it was told to the OP in a nice way that the way she is thinking is wrong. Then why did this particular post alone create such havoc??? Here we go #1. It was not an innocent thread. If it was, then the OP would have posted it under General Discussion and not under 'Releationship with Inlaws'. This is a forum where women vent about their in-laws and she wanted to give it back to the young ladies by creating this one. #2. This thread was more like a dirty gossip. If the OP had come to the forum saying that someone is dressing provocatively to seduce her husband then yes...It is a genuine problem. Why should you, I or anyone need to care about someone else's dressing sense and intention #3. Yes, It is wrong that her profession was a target. I do feel bad about it now but then in our or say most cultures, a Teacher is next to God himself and it was disheartening to see that it was a teacher who was saying all this. I am sorry for bringing it up again. No one was ganging up on the OP. Most of us here are of similar wave lenght. It is evident from every thread that gets started here. Though the answers are different, the approach is usually the same. The same thing happened here and unfortunately it was all negative and looked like ganging up. The older threads were refreshed due to curiosity and it is really hard for some of us to not comment when the blood is boiling with anger I am sorry to say this but I see that the OP is actually protected and it is only the people who spoke against racisim and gossips are made to look like villians. I could be wrong and it could be only my feeling. May be I am guilty
