Shristi

Shristi looked at the mail with a smile. It was from Manav. He was coming to Pune and would be visiting her, next week. “Only if it’s okay with you”, he concluded. Shristi smiled .Manav remained the same cute man, never wanting to hurt anyone. Vishnu entered the room with her tea and saw her smile.” What’s up Rani?” he quipped. His military aura, the chivalry, the flamboyancy all still intact even after so many years. His grey hair adding the extra charm to his handsome Greek god features.
Manav, he’s coming next week. “Wow that’s good news. Is Vinod joining him”? “He hasn’t mentioned that, but I guess he’s not. Manav is coming down on some biz and wants to know if I’m ok with his visit”. She smiled again looking beautiful. “Trust him to ask that”, said Vishnu.
After the tea that both shared Vishnu left to go to the study. And Shristi welcomed that time to reminisce about her life.
A beautiful girl, Shristi, well educated, her parents were on the look out for a groom for her. A good family, a loving husband in a good position and all the routine requirements were passed on to friends and relatives and search began.

Manav, the only son of his parents refused to get married. His parents kept forcing him but he refused. No way was he going to succumb to their pressures. Repeated warnings fell on deaf ears. Finally the parents approached a counselor.
During his first visit to the counselor Manav accompanied his parents and said nothing. The counselor asked for a private session with him. That day Manav had decided it was high time he revealed the reason for his displeasure to get married, one of the reasons he agreed to go to the counselor was that he needed some support to break the news to his parents. He couldn’t muster up enough courage to do it himself.
The counselor Aasha listened to him. Patiently, uninterrupting, Manav almost forgot her existence; it was as though he was speaking to himself. At last he sighed, “So you see Ma’am this is the reason I don’t want to get married. I can’t spoil three lives; I would never be able to live peacefully if I ever did. The guilt would kill me.”
The next day Aasha met his parents. “I have spoken to Manav. Now what I am about to tell you might not be very welcome, but we need to understand that each person is different. Sometimes nature plays a game with our preferences and that’s what has happened with Manav. Its not his fault .There is little he can do about it and it is only better for all concerned that we do not temper with nature. He cannot get married. And its better you don’t force him. He has a problem. Mr. and Mrs. Rao, Manav is a homosexual by choice. He cannot enjoy normal pleasures with a woman. He is attracted to men. Infact he has a lover that he is deeply involved with and that person works in his office. He is a very well placed professional. These things happen sometimes. It’s not in his hands or ours. We cannot change anything, but we have to abstain from forcing him into marriage, which could jeopardize three lives.”
“Oh please stop it”. Mr.Rao screamed. This was an expected reaction.Aasha was used to it. No parent is ready to hear this about their child. ? But then at some point of time they need to face reality. “There is nothing wrong with him. It is our pampering that has spoilt him. I’ll get him on the right track ”.Aasha tried her best to get them to see reason, but the Raos were obstinate. They were worried about the society.
Then began pure hell for Manav, His mother threatened suicide even tried to during one of their arguments. There were times when Manav wanted to end his life but couldn’t muster enough courage
During that time somebody suggested Shristi to Mr. Rao. Very soon the marriage was fixed. Shristis parents were happy with the match. Manav was well educated, had a good job, and was the only son. The family was well known and Shristi would be happy. Though they wondered about the hurry, but never made an issue of it. Also they wished Shristi to meet Manav privately, but every time Mrs.Rao would diplomatically rule it out.
The day Shristi met Manav along with the family from both sides, she found him very docile person, one who didn’t look at her and didn’t seem to want to either. But then when they were introduced she saw him give her a cute smile, but one that did not reach his eyes. Probably he was a very shy person; Shristi thought and was glad to know that such guys still existed.
Much against his wishes Manav went through the marriage, He hated his own lack of guts to move out or to take a drastic measure. He hated himself for not being the normal man. He hated and cursed himself for the fact that he had ruined Shristi’s life.
The wedding night that most girls looked forward to in silent anticipation was a complete nightmare for Shristi. Though she was a shy person, she found that Manav seemed far too shy than her. He didn’t look at her and though she knew she was a beautiful woman, she wondered why he distanced himself. After a couple of hours she asked him,”Manav are you happy with the marriage. It is really ironic that I ask you this now, when I should have done so before but I never had the opportunity. Correct me if I am wrong but you did not seem particularly happy the way I would expect a groom to be. “Then with a heavy heart and a barely audible voice she asked,” Manav, Are you in love with someone else? Is there a woman?” She thought that could probably be the only reason. Though it hurt her deeply to think even, that there might be. But yet she was ready for the truth. It was better than this indifference that she had to face. was better than to think that there might be something wrong with her and that she didn’t look attractive enough to lure her husband.
Manav too hated to see the mental torture she was going through. He had to let her know it was nothing about her. She was very attractive, very beautiful. Finally he decided to let it out not worrying about the repercussions. After all she would know about it sooner or later and tonight it would be very obvious. He said,” Yes Shristi there is somebody in my life, somebody that I love, and somebody that I feel very comfortable with, and would have loved to live my life with but my parents did not approve. So I had to succumb to their wishes under dire pressures.” Shristi mustered up enough courage to ask him, what’s wrong with her, Why didn’t your parents approve? Manav answered, not her Shristi it’s him, I love a man not a woman.
For a few seconds Shristi thought she was about to collapse. Her heart was pounding hard and she looked absolutely pale. She stared at him. She wished this were untrue or at least that it was a woman he was involved with .She would have tried to win him back. But now there was no hope. Her husband it hit her real hard was a gay.
She cried uncontrollably. Manav tried to hold her, extended his hand but stopped. He knew he had sinned. Completely jeopardized an innocent girl’s life. But what could he do? He hated himself for putting her through this torture. He was caught between his love for his mother who kept threatening to commit suicide. He had no option but to listen to her, but now though it was late he wished that he had reconsidered. He was responsible for the misery of this young lady here, whose life was now a big question mark.
Days passed and Shristi lost her interest in life. A meaningless existence. She could not tell her parents and burden them as she felt it would only add to their problems. She did not want to tell her in laws because somehow by then she had begun to feel that there was no point in talking to somebody who did not think twice before destroying somebody’s life for their own status in society.
Shristi soon became a ghost of her formal self. Manav almost died in guilt. Initially though they barely spoke, yet later he tried a lot to work on it... He tried to comfort her. He tried to bring some light moments in her life. He spent as much time as possible with her. He began coaxing her to go out with him .He tried to atone for his sin as far as possible.
Gradually Shristi began accepting her fate. Anyway there wasn’t much she could do.
Manav tried to do justice of being a good husband minus physical intimacy. Manav tried to spend less time with Vinod. During one of his days Manav introduced Shristi to Vinod when he came home. Shristi observed the way Manav looked at Vinod some thing that she hopelessly wished would be directed at her.
A couple of times Manav did try to get close to Shristi, she could see he was trying but it failed. She resigned to her fate. She knew this was her life now and this is what she needs to be happy with. But Manav remained in guilt.

He wanted Shristi to find happiness. He loved her and cared about her, by he had his
own limitations as a man.
One day he asked Shristi to meet him for dinner out. He had been promoted and he wanted to treat her. She asked anxiously, “Would Vinod be there?” “No”, said Manav.
At around 7 pm she entered the restaurant where he was waiting for her. Along with him was a tall man who looked very handsome. Shristi wondered who he is and what was he doing there. As soon as she approached the table this tall man stood up and pulled up a chair for her. Smiling she sat down as he said, “Capt. Vishnu Sharma. Ma’am a pleasure to meet you”.
The dinner was excellent and Manav noticed that Shristi seemed to be enjoying herself .For the first time after six months of their marriage he heard her laughter. Infact she heard her own laughter after so long. Vishnu was a lovely friend and in the end she thanked Manav for getting him though she initially had resented his presence here.
Capt Vishnu now was a regular visitor at their place and it was difficult to resist his charm when he invited them over quite often for luncheons and dine outs. Shristi often wondered at the sudden developed friendship but then kept her queries to herself.
One day when Shristi in her room, Manav said,” How do you find Vishnu?” “Very jovial and fun to be with. What about is family”? She replied “He’s a widow”. “Oh! How sad”
Shristi I want to be very honest with you. Do you think you can live your life like this with me? A little uncomfortable though Shristi replied in the affirmative. “But I can’t Shristi I can’t let a young life be ruined this way. You know Vishnu is my classmate and when he came to know what I had done, he was very furious. But then he met you and now I think you two make a great pair together. What I am telling you Shristi is to resettle your life with him and see it blossoming beautifully than letting it wither with me.
Shristi was speechless. You are asking me to marry another man .You are my husband, how could you? Shristi we can go about it for eons but look at it practically. I am ready to face the brunt of the society. I shall tell everybody about my problem or preferences whatever you call it but I cannot subject you to any more sorrow. You know for the first time I heard you laugh was when you were with Vishnu and then I realized what a fool I’ve been, how I had almost destroyed beauty in its purest form.
It took a few days for Manav to make Shristi see reason. One day Manav arranged a meet alone between Shristi and Vishnu and Vishnu confessed his desire to resurrect his lonely life with Shristi. Meanwhile Manav made it very obvious to his parents that he would not live with this woman because he was in love with a man. His mother again threatened him but this time he was prepared .He left his house the very day and kept in touch on the sly with Shristi. The neighbours blamed Manav for ruining a young ladies life. Her parents took her home and Vishnu approached their home with a proposal that was gladly accepted. Shristi felt sorry for Manav that he was being maligned for something that was beyond his control but she was very happy that she found a friend for a lifetime in him.
Manav still remained a close friend. He would visit them often. Their kids adored him and awaited his arrival. He treated Saloni and Vedant as his own kids.
Shristi closed her eyes and thanked Manav for the gem he was, the gem he gave her, Vishnu her life, her love, her husband now since the last two decades. She got up and called Mala, her househelp, “Make something very special tomorrow, my very close friend is expected”. She said with a delightful smile on her lips and her eyes.

Love,
Devika