A Sad Illustration of Technological Advancement!

varalotti · Jan 25, 2007

Todays newspapers carried a news which deeply disturbed me.
A software engineer by name Arasu was married to Gayathri, another software engineer. The marriage was in 2001. Slowly they drifted from each other and during the last year the separation was complete, both physically and figuratively. Gayathri took a job in Australia, while Arasu continued to be in Chennai.
Before Gayathri went to Australia they had filed papers for mutual consent divorce under Section 13B of the Hindu Marriages Act. Under the prevailing legal provisions, both the husband and wife have to appear before the court and confirm their consent for divorce.
Gayathri expressed her inability to come to India for this, as she was caught in a project there in Australia.
So Arasu filed a petition before the High Court of Madras to accept video conferencing evidence from his estranged wife. The Judge accepted his plea and using a laptop computer in the court he examined Gayathri and then granted divorce to them.
Honestly ladies, I do not know, whether we should be happy at this technical advancement or should be concerned that technology enables a speedier separation and divorce. I am not that dumb to think that but for video conferencing this divorce would not have happened. At the worst it could have been delayed till Gayathri found time to fly to Chennai. Anyhow divorce is only a funeral for a dead marriage and by delaying the funeral we cannot revive the dead back to life.
But in the corners of my mind I have a vague pain that too much of involvement with technology makes us incapable of sustaining intimate human relationships over a period of time.
If you, the ILites in one big voice, confirm this is not true, then I will be one of the happiest losers (of this argument) in the world.
Over to you, Most Gracious ILites,
sridhar

ambika ananth · Jan 25, 2007

Dear Sridhar
I feel in this case by hastening the process of the inevitable divorce, the anxiety and distress is lessened to both the parties involved. Technology that way has acted positively, saving so much time,energy and money which otherwise would have been factors of concern. Technology if rightly used can enhance human relations, which we members of IL can vouch for...
regards
ambika

Vidya24 · Jan 25, 2007

Dear Sridhar,

I concur with Ambika fully and you (to an extent). Technology has served all parties well here. It would all have been 'shubham' if Gayatri had physically come to court, on meeting Arasu had some rekindling of fond,old memories and the divorce stayed. But that was not the case. They had made deliberate decisions to separate and technology only made it less painful for everyone. And saved us the tax payers some money too.

But I agree fully with you that' too much of involvement with technology makes us incapable of sustaining intimate human relationships over a period of time'. As technology empowers us to stay more connected in a global scale, it erodes our connectivity on a personal level. Is it right to say, the saulabhyam has improved, but the sameepyam deteriorated? Sometimes, the only birthday cards one receives are those from internet marketing groups.Video conferences may make business more profitable at an international level. But then there are many wives, widows of workaholic husbands who conduct a full married life over telephone conversations, e-mails,SMS and chats. The excuse that the husband calls his wife every hour, does not compensate for his physical absence.

But all this is not really new to us,is it? The busy mom saving her daughters Varnam on her mobile to listen since she cannot attend a school concert, the absentee Dad posting his child's pencil sketch of 'Happy Family' as his screen saver, the couple having cuddly telephone convos- oh ,it is all so easy and earnest to blame technology for losing our personal moments and private intimacy. We talk of quality time enabled by technology, whom are we fooling?

Anyway, to stay on videoconferencing, in TVM, we have a diligent Prisons IG who has made it possible to have convicts tried on video. Apparently, maximum escapes occured when prisoners were being driven to the court for sentencing. Hence, this tech slick judicial review!

regards
Vidya

vidyasarada · Jan 25, 2007

Dear Sridhar
In this particular case, technology does not seem to have played any sinister role. The relationship was already dead and as you say, only the "funeral "was aided by technology.
It is true that technology has made islands of people, but it is the same technology that provides connectivity between these islands too. Technology is like the proverbial fire that can light a lamp or burn down a house. It depends on the person using it.
Look how we are all using technology to bond together at IL !

VS

sudhavnarasimhan · Jan 26, 2007

Dear All,

I agree with the others in saying that there are a lot of positive side to technology....like Vidhyasarada has pointes out , we all have bonded so well and become intimate due to this advancement isnt it!
We just need to make use in the right way and keep a limit....thats what we need to know ...where is the limit? And who decides ....it has to be as a whole society!

But Sridhar, very nice of you to share your thoughts on this subject!

varalotti · Jan 26, 2007

Thanks A Ton!

Dear All, (who enriched this thread)
As Vidyasarada says, as Ambika says, as Vidya says, as Sudha says, yes in this instance technology has not played any sinister role. I did say that in my post as well. But you know our minds do not function in a mere cause and effect rational state always.
When I read that videoconferencing is used to expedite a divorce case, my mind jumped here and there and was ultimately very sad. Instead of thinking how much relief it has brought to the concerned parties by making the whole procedure painless, I was just thinking that how many "techies" have a bad married life. It is not because they cannot cope up with marriage; but because they dont have time to. That made me sad. And hence I posted this snippet.
I remember the divorce case of my dear friend. She was working in Coimbatore. And the case was filed in Vijayawada. Every month she had to travel all the way from here to there only to learn that the case has been adjourned to next month. She told me that the legal procedure was more painful than the divorce per se.
May be I thought of her. Only if this facility existed at that time, her grief might have been a bit less. And because of that the tragic mood crept in.
Yes I do know that technology is the bonding factor (not the binding factor) for all of us here in this site. So let us celebrate technology.
sridhar

nuggehallipankaja · Jan 26, 2007

Sridar,
That was a very interesting and educative argument led by the brainy females! i enjoyed reading it, though it was a bit painful too-at the cost of unnecessary emotional disturbance to the parties concerned, esp to the girl; Has fate played a part? Brahma seems to be becoming a bit senile nowadays while weaving his inexorable 'Brahma-gauntu';Time he changes his thinking to global level.
Sorry if have veered from the topic; But the way things are changing,shaping, makes one wonder at the bold rapid strides. i fully agree with the argument put forth by Ambika, and am impressed by the lucid facts elucidated by the rest. Anyway, you have another good material for a poignant story!
Pankaja

Manjureddy · Jan 27, 2007

Dear Varlotti Sir
I am a late-latif here . Your last post has a tone of finality, like you want to wind up this discussuion. Please give me a chance to say what I feel about technology's influence on human life.

All the above ladies seem to be on the "For" side of the debate and none "against". Yes, it is impossible to be against.
Ever since a distant ancestor figured out that round (circular) things move better,Technology has defined the march of civilization. While Mr.Ancestor grunted over his technological wonder, The Wheel, Mrs.Ancestor initiated textile technology by making fur coats for the family from the discarded packaging of fresh meat. Without technology (Wo) Man could not have started agriculture or built cities or transported in boats and carts. Only after being freed from the primal animal needs of hunting and surviving ,by such technology, he was able to turn his energies to the pursuit of higher ideals like fine arts and philosophy.
We are ever so proud of our heritage and never fail to drop names like Susruta, Aryabhatta, Varahamihira etc. Without the technology of implements and scales and lenses could they have achieved anything ?
Our Gods routinely vanquished Evil with martial technology. Recall these : Brahmastra, Saranga, Pinaka, Gandiva, Sudarshana, Kaumodaki, Pushpaka Vimana etc.Etc. all weaponry fashioned by different technologies. The ordinary Conch became Panchjanya only when the technology of precision -drilling was used on it.
Food technology gave us Kozhukattai, idli , payasam and everything else we relish.
The bricks that built Nalanda and Takshashila were products of soil baking technology.
History of mankind is really just a listing of technological innovations. Only a Luddite would argue that technology has ruined humanity ; and he still needs paper, print or other media to disseminate his arguement ! If indeed humanity is ruined by technology , it should have been ruined the day the first hut was put up. Cassandras and Doomsday prophets have been around for ages now, yet we have been marching on quite nicely, even occassionally producing saints and philosophers . updating and rebooting ourselves to suit the dynamics of Time is a necessity , And it produces changes ; and changes generally seem hard to take. Yet we do get used to it and a generation later, we will be going mushy about "good old days" which is "today" now.
Nostalgia for bygone times is only a cunning device of Memory to counterbalance the anxieties of The Present.
Honestly, what "human touch" was there in a marriage 100 years ago with the (frequently polygamous)husband lording it over in the front porch ( Mun-Kattu) and the silenced wives hovering in the backyard (pin-kattu) without a word of communication passing between them throughout the day ?

Manjula

sudhavnarasimhan · Jan 27, 2007

Dear Manjula,
That is a such a good post ...you have traced the tech advancement from ancient times and put forth your views so well....hats off yaar....you are such a wonderful writer! I really enjoyed reading it....are you a literature student by any chance!? :clap

sudhavnarasimhan · Jan 27, 2007

Dear All,

I just wanted to share one techie advancement which i feel need not have come.....it is these kids playstations and game boys. Of course i dont have a young boy , of that age so i escaped....but have seen the woe of my sister who has 2 boys , 12 and 7....she tried her level best not to get it for them....but peer pressure, for the kids and for her too has finally let her succumb to it...but she says though she has control on their time they spend on it, they just go off to their friends houses , where they have full freedom(parents are not at home, partying or working etc!)....and they get addicted! It is not the case only with young ones, it seems the older ones are also so addicted that one MBA graduate committed suicide since he could not get good marks, as he was addicted to this playstation or some other gadget!

I recently saw an ad on Sun tv, on pension scheme....the senior citizens are playing cricket and they hit a window pane...and out come 2 motu boys who are busy palying this playstation or something and refuse to give the ball as they were disturbed. The concept was for pensioners scheme, but the way the little ones were portrayed as sitting in front of the monitors, and not playing outside, gave me a sinister feeling.....so has this technological development led our little ones astray in a different way!
Well, food for thought......only the ones exposed to this will be able to enlighten i feel!