Another Lakshmi, Another Pathetic Story. I Can’t Judge, Can You?

Lakshmi married Rajan when she was pretty young. She had just finished her schooling when the marriage took place. Rajan was a petty Government official. At the time when this happened his salary was a mere Rs.10000 per month.
Within 6 years of marriage the couple had four children – three boys and a girl. The couple found it very difficult to make both ends meet. With four children around and not being afford to hire domestic help Lakshmi was dead-tired at the end of the day. When her husband made sexual advances to her she would brutally refuse.
Another issue that created distance between the couple was Rajan’s packet money. Rajan used to smoke, chew pan and occasionally drink, though he was far from being an alchoholic. He needed a small allowance for all these indulgences. Lakshmi would flatly refuse to pay that. Her argument was that when the monthly salary was not even enough to cover the food, rent and cost of education for their children, Rajan should not even think of luxuries like cigarretes, pan etc.
Rajan had to concede. Every month Lakshmi would get his salary cover and would grant only the money absolutely necessary to cover Rajan’s bus travel to office and back.
Life was as boring as ever for both of them. Suddenly Lakshmi found Rajan very happy, very enthusiastic and brimming with energy. She smelt fish and asked her relative to investigate Rajan’s activities. She was shocked to find that Rajan was carrying on with another woman, much older than him and not so good looking.
As was the custom of the town she was living, she summoned the community elders to resolve this issue. When the elders confronted Rajan with the finding he readily confessed. But he told them all, that in his existing marriage neither could he get conjugal happiness, nor even money for small pleasures of life like a smoke, a pan and an occasional bottle of beer. The woman with whom he was carrying on gave him all – sex and money too. Rajan promised to continue to give whatever he earned to Lakshmi. Since Lakshmi was not interested in sex she should turn the other way about the affair. Or if she promised to give those pleasures to Rajan whenever he wanted and also pay a small allowance to him every month he was willing to end his affair.

Lakshmi thought over the matter. With four pregnancies all in a matter of 6 to 7 years, with four children around and the family being constantly in a state of want, she could not even think of resuming the sexual relationship with her husband. May be she was disgusted or had become frigid due to her circumstances. A small packet money to her husband meant a dent in the family budget which was already a shoe-string. If some one was ready to give these two things to her husband why should she stand in the way?
She expressly condoned her husband's affair and made it clear that she did not mind it being continued.

Do you think what she did was sensible?

3 boys and 1 girl in 6 years? Now THATS not too sensible. But 2 boys and 2 girls might have been better.:confused:

This Lakshmi's life is miserable. She has been reduced to a baby-producing machine. After the first two kids she should have got herself sterilised. But considering the strata of society she belongs to maybe having more kids means having more helping hands. From her standpoint it's a relief to her that her husband has found another source for sex and money.
In comparison to Varalotti's other stories this one is a disappointment - there is neither meat nor gravy! It's a situational analysis.
SHARADA

Sharadha, we have been eating too much of meat and gravy. For a change let's go for salads. In fact I had another highly controversial story. But this is a real case where my friend was called to arbitrate. He told me the story and I posted it on the net.
I told you I cant judge her. Which means I cant say, whether it is right or wrong. Now if Lakshmi allows her husband to go out for sex and money, what's the rationale for the continuance of their marriage?
Now that you have mentioned about absence of meat or gravy, let me add some.
Just reverse the roles in this case. Assuming the husband has become impotent and could not provide money to the family. And Lakshmi tells him that she is having sexual relationship with another man for these two reasons - for sex and money? How would the husband view that? And what kind of label Lakshmi would get?
sridhar

#assume the husband has become impotent and could not provide money to the family#

Government jobs have certainly become interesting. Was he in the Dept of Animal Husbandry?

you have a tremendous sense of humour, Concorde. 'Husband' in animal husbandry but could not 'husband' his wife- ha, ha, ha..
I am for vegetarianism. But Sharadha wanted meat, I could not help it.
sridhar

Recommendations after Analysis

1. Rajan may consider taking up a job in a Brewery
2. He may consider Yoga to eliminate or reduce his odd needs
3. He should eliminate fish from his diet since that seems to have caused his wife to become suspicious
4. He may consider modeling for a prophylactic company to supplement his meagre income.
5. He may refer to SaveKaryn.com and take up internet-based begging
6. He may consider two more kids - only girls please - and become a poster boy for the World Population Fund. Radical problems demand Radical solutions.
7. Since he only wants small pleasures - for obvious reasons - this may be provided in monthly installments

When u say the story is factual, we have not left with much to judge about lakshmi's stance. Even if we were to judge, most of us would say she was wrong for the first moment. May be after a little brooding and empathy, we would think there was a slight justification to what she did. Whatever it is, lakshmi was practically left with no more choice,though it seems morally and culturally wrong.

I feel, rather than judging lakshmi's actions in the end, we shed light on Why she had to face such a perplexing scenario.

First of all the story subtly emphasises that a married couple MUST be educated about FAMILY PLANNING. The lack of which lead to our lakshmi's plight.

Secondly, if lakshmi was educated, then she would have earned too, therby helping her husband to maintain their family.

I thinks its high time for all lakshmis of our society to get educated so that we get to read happy stories of them without such baffling climaxes.

So wake up lakshmi!!!

If the roles had been reversed, Lakshmi could have got both on the sly (ie money and sex) taking proper precautions. Only if the affair is known to others will she be labelled a slut. I'm sure there are many Lakshmis with impotent and poor/stingy husbands - many must be having indulgent lovers on the side.
Concorde's 2nd snippet I've not been able to comprehend - she's taken off at a tangent.
Since this is a true-life situation we have to accept whatever Lakshmi embraces - no point in debating.
SHARADA

Concorde, well, I am beginning to appreciate your sense of humour. But for you the discussion would have been very serious and according to Sharada could have been monotonous too.
Prathi, I appreciate your social consciousness. Lack of family planning led to all woes, in the first place. But that apart, what more is there in this situation?
Sharadha, your stand that there are many Lakshmi's who are stealthily getting money and sex is quite acceptable. But the question is if that Lakshmi is caught (like her husband Rajan was caught now) what would happen?
Sharadha, is the meat enough, or should I add some more?
varalotti