A birthday celebration!!

We all might agree that nowadays people do have more money in their hands. As soon as the youngsters finish their education, they land in good jobs with a minimum salary of 20K (exceptions are there). A youngster earning in the beginning so much money is not sure what he has to do with the money. So most of the time they are seen in pubs, discotheques etc.

A person holding a very high office undoubtedly gets a good amount and the perks needed for a luxurious life. Not to ask if both the couple are high flying and holding higher positions. Their lifestyle is full of class, parties and workers at their beck and call. Now my point here is kids born to these kinds of couple.

I have a friend who has a son aged around 6 – 7 yrs. Both the couple are holding higher positions in their respective fields. Hence they have a luxurious apartment. The child goes to the best of schools. Cars, drivers and workers at their beck and call. Recently the child’s birthday arrived. Lot of activity started much before the actual D Date. A club was booked, a magician was called in and a caterer was roped to serve one of the best delicacies. The boy was dressed like a prince with all the accessories purchased. A Large Cake was ordered. Return gifts were purchased. Total cost approx would be minimum of 20 – 25K.

This set my thinking process; do we really need such lavish celebrations? When we have children around us who do not have two square meals, can we afford this kind of celebrations? Should we not be responsible to our society too? You may ask me this is their personal affair and they do have lots of money so what’s my problem. But think of the child, he thinks he can get the best of everything with money. He becomes too selfish. Least bothered about the society. He thinks with money he can get all happiness in the world? Instead of these kind of celebrations, if the party had been arranged say in an orphanage where he could have given his best to the deprived ones. How much of blessings and love he would have received. And here we are inculcating a great principle in his life i.e. SHARING, which is an important thing as the child grows up. He also learns to pay back to the society what he received from it.

As John F Kennedy says, “Ask not what the country does for you; Ask what you can do for the country”. We should catch this spirit when the minds are still young and innocent.

Dear Lalitha,

I Totally agree with you. With more of a lavish lifestyle the younger kids become much spoilt a head of their age , and the birthday parties spendings etc though assumed a personal interference, the choice of opting to fund a orphange or educating a child would be appreciated.

Dear Lalitha,
Good post! Yes, its true that people around spend so much on these birthday bashes..and take little or no carefor society.Its a sad state of affairs that most people talk of it , but very few of us does it...Well, as for me,i made it a point to not even buy any present for my /DH birthday and it will be the same for my kid too in future.If at all i buy for others like mom, dad or sis its just any useful stuff and no cake cutting/dinner party etc.
For my MIL's devasam day, me and DH donate clothes and money at an oldage home for their maintenance and food every year near our house - "Amiathi muthiyor illam".

Hope your post is an eyeopener for all.Keep them coming!

Dear Lalitha

I agree with u. Its better to spend that money in an Orphanage,
the children there would behappy and would have enjoyed.
But now adays it has become a fashion to celebrate birthdays
lavishly with parties and return gifts. The children who cant spend
feel upset.

viji

Lalitha
This is an eye opener writeup. What you describe is the norm today.. As parents we face the dilemma should we join the crowd or not.
In my family we do celebrate .. but more religious and in prayers. If we do exchange a gift it will be one that is needed like I might get a pressure cooker if mine of much overdue and the new one is needed.
For my child to we only get what is needed like shoes or clothes etc.
Whereas all around we see these brithday or other celebrations and money being totally wasted!
I feel that I am in a minority compared to my Indian counterparts.. Infact my relatives in India ridicule us for not celebrating in a more lavish scale.
I think that quote was made by JohnFKennedy. Not sure.
maybe today's good jobs and better payscales have led to this situation.. Glad you wrote about it. Do keep writing.

My dear Lalitha,
That is a wonderful thought.We have enough occasions to buy good clothes for the children and give them what they want like Diwali,Sankaranthi New year day ,Christhmas eve etc.If only the parents understand the importance of educating their children in the right way giving them good values and try and have birth day parties in orphanages or old age homes in a simple manner ,giving happiness to others, there is nothng like it.I will surely share this thought with my daughters who have small kids.I appreciate your thoght behind that wondrful message.
love
mithila kannan

Hi Lalitha
I totally agree with you, does all the people think in the same manner, we should always see what we can do to others, then expecting what others can do for us, true if we all start thinking that way we wouldn't have had poor people around and the world would be with full oh love and affection around us. Respect for each other.
You have brought up a good topic, and have written very well...........

Dear Lalitha,


Yes so very true, I agree with every word that u say.


An orphanage would be the best place to celebrate.We did that for my daughters, and the expierence was wonderful really.We took Cokes , icecreams and toffess for the kids, and they just loved it.

Regards.kamal

Dear Lalitha
not only birthdays, even marriages are being celebrated in a grand manner, a middle class family spending around 10 lacs per marriage.
Costly clothes,expensive jewelleries and wasteful food have besome status symbols! Noone seem to bother about wastes.
In fact, we can celebrate all functions in a simple way, reduce the expenses to 50% and donate the other half to people who are in need.
No doubt, children should enjoy their birthday but it is the parents who should show them what real enjoyment is!
Jaya Mohan

My Dear Lali,


Nice thought provoking thread.

I agree that now with the higher income the standard of living has also increased.But being rich doesnt neccassarily mean saying good bye to humility. I believe there are a lot of good people in urban and rich homes as there are in their poorer cointerparts as ther are the bad ones two on both sections. Money has notrhing much to do with the basic character of a person or the way a child can be moulded. These days yes there is a lot of flaunting, some necessities and some luxuries that have now become neccessities. We have sen Krishna from a rich home befriedning a Sudama and this is not purely mythological there are many like that even now. I guess rich or poor it depends on us how we bring up our child . For eg, The education that stresses on theoretical and practical . Theoretical from school regarding academics helps you in moulding your career and your future . Practical is what we learn from our parents, society, friends,etc, helps in moulding our character.
As far as my personal experience goes , my daughters bday always kickstarts with a morning party at a nearby old age home that too not because I force her but she looks forward to spend it with all her grandpas and grandmoms there. And ofcourse evenings are for friends.
I really dont go around preaching budgets but it would be better if the money spent can be used more effectively solely for the childs purpose.Makes one feel like having investing the hard earned money sensibly.( here I like to add that though I might send on my kids bday but I do not lavishly spend on Diwali on fireworks cause I really think that is the right way to save money, lungs and life.)

Lali nice thread dear and lovely Fbs too

Love,
Devs