Destiny or Fate?

Destiny refers to a pre-determined course of events. It infers that one’s future is pre-ordained. Meaning one’s life has a chart to follow and in due course one would follow it through and achieve what one was meant to.
This thought of destiny and being destined has been stuck to my mind after reading the speech by Mr. Narayana Murthy which he delivered to the Stern School of Business in New York.(
http://www.indusladies.com/forums/ge...ys-speech.html)
In his speech, Mr. Murthy clearly indicates a couple of chance encounters that shaped his future. Be it called encounters or coincidence , he claims he is where he is today mostly due to those encounters while he was a graduate student and shortly thereafter.
Could it then be inferred that he was predestined to his life as we see it today? Were the chance encounters more to help him fulfill his destiny? Or is it Fate?
Fate on the other hand refers to the finality of events as they have worked out. Fate and Destiny can be distinguished though closely related and used interchangeably. Most often fate is a finality.
I am sure if we were to study the life of many great leaders we would find that many such incidents did happen for them to live their destined lives.
What we then refer to circumstance or luck, would they then fall into the predestined or fate category?
This then would bring us to the age old question, Is it then worth the try? Does one need to try and strive for greatness if we maybe are not predestined for it.
That clearly seems to be the wrong approach to have as it is an easy way out for sure. It is also an excuse one can cling to in the event things do not work out the way one wants it to.
Growing up I have seen the influence of astrology in our day to day lives. For important events like marriages ,the astrologer would check the bride and groom’s horoscopes to set the wedding date. Even day to day matters would strictly be guided by Raghu kalam and its timings.
I still used to dread if school starts on a Monday then I would have to leave home before 7.30a.m. and be the first one to arrive at school. And as luck would have it, school always started on Mondays.
If going by the above destined way of life, there then is no need to consult with astrology. In today’s world where many are far removed from such consulting factors, we rely on our convenience. For instance if we need to move into a new home we just choose what date is more convenient rather than consult an astrologer.
Looking at this from a rational point of view it does appear that it serves to be more practical to negate the influences of destiny and fate and place more significance on one’s free will and the choice thereof.
Does anyone else hold value to destiny or fate or do you accept things as they come or do you not believe in any of this? Do share your views.

Hello, AnandChitra

This is an interesting topic. I hope you (and the other ILItes) will permit me to share my views, even though they may at times be contrary to what a lot of people believe.

I'm not a believe in any of the things you mentioned (faith, destiny, astrology, etc.). I understand that a lot of Indians do choose to live their lives according to these beliefs, and I don't think there's anything necessarily wrong with that. It's just not for me.

This is not a path I consciously chose, but rather the result of an upbringing by very practical and pragmatic parents. Of course, as I grew older, they always told me I was free to change my beliefs as I saw fit. But it has suited me to follow their example (as I'm sure a lot of people who do believe in fate, destiny, and astrology follow the example of their parents).

Thus, every decision I've made in my life has been as a result of my own choices and decisions (of course, also taking into account the choices and decisions of those closest to me too). This means I've been incredibly free to do whatever I want. I've also learned the lesson that with this great freedom comes great responsibility. This means that when I succeed, I know it is largely because of my own hard work. And when I fail, I know to look within me to see how I could have done things differently, and learn for the future.

I think this attitude has served me well, in that I don't have the easy escape of blaming unfortunate events on my stars, or anything else as random as that. It's made me a stronger person who always feels in control of my own life. Also, when things tend to get a bit out of control, I can take a deep breath and figure out how to get back on track. This is because I don't assume there are dark forces at work trying to bring me down. It's simply a matter of re-focussing my energies and doing what's practical to get on with my life.

I have a friend who blames her current problems with her MIL as her "bad karma". I find this a short-sighted way of looking at things. By attributing negative situations to otherworldy causes beyond our control, we may tend to live our lives with a certain passivity (whatever will happen will happen, who am I to try something new or different?). Although this may be a coping mechanism for some, for me it can become an excuse to remain in a rut or give in to self-pity, instead of DOING something. So, I choose to always believe that I can change my circumstances. And this has been incredibly empowering for me, especially when things are not looking too good.

I'd be very interested in hearing from other Indians who also choose pragmatism and practicality, especially if you've been the odd one out in doing that in your particular family or society. Thanks again, AC, for posing such an intriguing question!

Ansuya

Dear AC,
Where do you come up with such thoughts, iam really amazed at your capcity to put them in words. Destiny is somehting that, according to me, no one can change , but if you work hard at it you can change your fate. There are so many times that you fail to pay heed to what your family/ friends say then you land in trouble, this can be avoided. Whatever be the sitatuion only your hardwork and comitmment will pay off in the longer run.
My thoughts!!!

Ansuya
So glad you wrote here.. please feel free to express your views.. I have written this so as to hear other points of view. Reading your comment is a pleasure.
And I admire that based on a practical and pragmatic upbringing you have been able to handle your life in a more mature level and reach decisions by choice.
It is not only you who is free to do but all of us too. Though many would disagree.
It is my opinion that one has a choice in any given moment and thereby should take responsibility to that choice.
I can see your attitude reflected in my son. He always strives to get the top marks in studies but when he falls behind on a test , it is even more clear to him that his test preparations were not upto par. Hence the result.
Many people I know take refuge in fate and destiny thereby eliminating the need to face reality. That reality that one refuses to face is probably not a pleasant one nor is it a desired one. Hence the need for refuge.
These imaginary chains of destiny and fate and astrology can only be broken when one realises one has the right to choose and assumes full responisbility to the consequences.
On a spiritual plane, no desire should reside in these consequences. so the presence of free will.
Thanks for writing her Ansuya.. it has been a honor.

Originally Posted by Jananikrithsan

Dear AC,
Where do you come up with such thoughts, iam really amazed at your capcity to put them in words. Destiny is somehting that, according to me, no one can change , but if you work hard at it you can change your fate. There are so many times that you fail to pay heed to what your family/ friends say then you land in trouble, this can be avoided. Whatever be the sitatuion only your hardwork and comitmment will pay off in the longer run.
My thoughts!!!

Janani
After I read Mr. Murthy's speech it was natural but to think. I know of many many who have chances like he did.. but no one is anywhere near the position he is today.. hence my thoughts about destiny.
I admire your lines that if you work hard you can change fate. Shows how mature you are in your mind and attitude. I agree that hard work and commitment will pay always.

Hi Ac,

Destiny is what God has destined us with and fate is we ask for forgiveness, pray, perform remedies and try to bring in fate!

Originally Posted by malspie

Hi Ac,

Destiny is what God has destined us with and fate is we ask for forgiveness, pray, perform remedies and try to bring in fate!

Mals thats a good line
BTW you do not mention if you beleive in either or if your life has been affecte by either!

Dear AC,

Food for thought.

Oh yes, I believe Destiny rules us. As Malspiebai says, destiny can be altered by good Karma.

Destiny is what got me married to a person who did not hail from my state forget city. Destiny made us leave India for Oz.

Destiny got me in touch with IL. AC, I know I am opening a Pandora's Box here but this is my personal opinion that destiny rules us.

Yes, people do not give importance to Astro. Anything bad is blamed on the planets. How come these same people do not credit the planets when they have a good life? These people forget Astrology is a science that warns you of the pitfalls & gives you a chance to rectify your mistakes. Unfortunately, it is now used to predict the "right time for a child to be born, how to get a male child etc."

Not all of us can live like William Earnest Henley the poet who wrote, "Invictus". The last verse says :

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.

Even for this poem to come out of the poet's pen, destiny must have pushed him to compose this poem.

Regards,

Corallux

Originally Posted by Anandchitra

Destiny refers to a pre-determined course of events. It infers that one’s future is pre-ordained. Meaning one’s life has a chart to follow and in due course one would follow it through and achieve what one was meant to.
This thought of destiny and being destined has been stuck to my mind after reading the speech by Mr. Narayana Murthy which he delivered to the Stern School of Business in New York.(
http://www.indusladies.com/forums/ge...ys-speech.html)
In his speech, Mr. Murthy clearly indicates a couple of chance encounters that shaped his future. Be it called encounters or coincidence , he claims he is where he is today mostly due to those encounters while he was a graduate student and shortly thereafter.
Could it then be inferred that he was predestined to his life as we see it today? Were the chance encounters more to help him fulfill his destiny? Or is it Fate?
Fate on the other hand refers to the finality of events as they have worked out. Fate and Destiny can be distinguished though closely related and used interchangeably. Most often fate is a finality.
I am sure if we were to study the life of many great leaders we would find that many such incidents did happen for them to live their destined lives.
What we then refer to circumstance or luck, would they then fall into the predestined or fate category?
This then would bring us to the age old question, Is it then worth the try? Does one need to try and strive for greatness if we maybe are not predestined for it.
That clearly seems to be the wrong approach to have as it is an easy way out for sure. It is also an excuse one can cling to in the event things do not work out the way one wants it to.
Growing up I have seen the influence of astrology in our day to day lives. For important events like marriages ,the astrologer would check the bride and groom’s horoscopes to set the wedding date. Even day to day matters would strictly be guided by Raghu kalam and its timings.
I still used to dread if school starts on a Monday then I would have to leave home before 7.30a.m. and be the first one to arrive at school. And as luck would have it, school always started on Mondays.
If going by the above destined way of life, there then is no need to consult with astrology. In today’s world where many are far removed from such consulting factors, we rely on our convenience. For instance if we need to move into a new home we just choose what date is more convenient rather than consult an astrologer.
Looking at this from a rational point of view it does appear that it serves to be more practical to negate the influences of destiny and fate and place more significance on one’s free will and the choice thereof.
Does anyone else hold value to destiny or fate or do you accept things as they come or do you not believe in any of this? Do share your views.

Hello, Corallux!

I don't share your opinions about destiny, fate, and karma, but I wanted to thank you very much for introducing me to the Henley poem. I'd never heard of it before, and like all good poems, it sent shivers of delight down my spine on my first reading of it. It is simple and eloquent, and reading Henley's background (he had tuberculosis of the bone and had to have his leg amputated) made it all the more poignant and meaningful.

It is a very inspiring poem and I shall look to it always, especially when I need to muster up the strength to master my fate and captain my soul! I think the idea of destiny and fate is often linked to being religious (the notion that the course of our lives are preordained by a higher power). Often, this can be a source of great solace in a world that can seem cruel and random. So, although I myself don't believe in these things, I can see how it can be a comforting thought to a lot of people. In this context, it is not a bad thing.

Like I've said before, though, we need to guard against assuming that what we do makes no real difference to the course of our lives because it's all been pre-determined anyway. The danger here may be the abused wife who feels she has no right to escape her unhappy marriage, the depressed teenager who feels it his "fate" to kill himself rather than seek help for his problems, or the rich landowner who, by virtue of being highborn and so "destined" for power, feels it his birthright to oppress and exploit those who are his subjects.

Again, thanks for sharing this great poem with us, Corallux, and thanks also to AC for making me think so hard so late at night!

Ansuya

Dear Anandchitra

We should try hard to get what we want and if we are destined
to get , we will get it. We have an astrologer who is our
neighbour. He does match making . He wont match the horoscopes
until 10 porutam is there. He not only sees the present situation
but sees about the future also. Many people believe in him and
give the horoscopes to match. But some say he does not match
any horosocope and give so why go to him. One friend of mine
also used to say if u depend on him for getting your daughter
married , u daughter will benever married. I told her the astrologer
is not God and if a person is destined to be married at that time
the astrologer cant stop it. By some way the person will be
married. When my daughter got married I told her see he only
matched the horoscope and gave and she is married. Whatever we
will get it but we have to work hard for it also and without working
shoud not say I was not destined for it.

viji