Kannamma,you are my life,you are my love and you are its ecstasy!

You are my life,Kannamma you are its meaning.
You are my love,Kannamma,you are its ecstasy

It was nearing five o’ clock in the evening.Kannamma who had hurriedly finished making tiffin for the evening,washed her face,combed her long hair,wore it as a ‘kondai’that’s how Vasu liked it and kept a small tikka on her forehead.She tidied up the nine yards saree that she was wearing and came to the door that opened to the street.She leaned on the door and started looking at the end of the street.In a few minutes Vasu’s cycle would enter the street and Vasu would ring the cycle bell in that peculiar manner which he only could do .Suddenly Kannamma’s senses sharpened,she could feel Vasu approaching this street from the main road.She tilted her face a little further to look at the entrance to the street and there he was,Vasu ,her husband.Her face blossomed like a rose which opens its petals in the morning sun and a small blush painted her cheeks.She smiled and Vasu smiled back at her.Even though he was quite far away from their house he knew every movement of his wife.As always he wondered how is it that Kannamma has managed to look so beautiful and so serene and her smile so captivating after so many years of marriage.
He kept the cycle in the verandah of that ancient house,the only property his father had left behind for him and Kannamma brought water in a mug to the entrance of the hall where the open to the sky ,another part of the ancient house and extended it towards him.Vasu washed his feet ,came and sat in the hall in the easychair while Kannamma went inside to bring him coffee.This routine has been followed in his life ever since he got married.”There is no money,no riches,but there is serenity,peace and mutual love and kinship,thanks to Kannamma”Vasu smiled,the content smile which not many men can afford .
Vasu’s mother Visalam waited till Vasu finished drinking his coffee and asked her daughtwer in law,”Did you show him the invitation from your sister in law”
“Invitation,which invitation for what?”Suddenly Vasu’s peaceful countenance changed,there appeared worry lines n his face.
Kannamma brought the invitation that came in the afternoon and gave it to him.The invitation was from his elder sister.Her husband would be completing 60 years and as is the Hindu custom they were planning to celebrate it as Sashti aptha purthy.It was to be celebrated on the 20<SUP>th</SUP> that is the coming Monday.His sister had attached a small note for him with the invitation.
“my dear Vasu,
Your brother inlaw ‘s shshtiaptha purthy is being celebrated.When I got married t him your brother in law did not demand anything,he married me with a single chain on my neck.Now atleast you people should do him the honour of buying the proper things for the function.I don’t have to tell you.Please ask Amma and bring the things which should be given from the mother’s side of the wife for the function.”
Koki Akka.
Vasu just closed his eyes.His mother’s voice woke him up.
“Vasu,as Koki has said,we did not give anything for her marriage.Now we have to give her all that the mother’s side has to give on this occasion.
We have to get her thirumangalyam,new clothes for both of the and then the other things like garlands,flowers,sweets etc”.Visalam would have gone on and on, had not Vasu stopped her.
“Amma where will I go for buying thirumangalyam Amma,do you know the price of gold today.Even one quarter sovereign would cost lot of money.Other things I can somehow manage,that too is very difficult,Amma.You know our financial position,no.It is not even an year since Yamuna got married. I have not paid back even that loan in full Amma”Vasu’s voice trailed off.
Visalam was almost in tears.”Vasu,our problems will always be there.We can not shirk our responsibility,no,just because we have problems?In all these years, after her marriage,Koki has not asked us for anything.As her luck would have it ,she has remained childless,We have not spent anything for her.”
Visalam wiped her tears,removed the thin gld bangle s,a pair of them,her only earthly possessions which she can call her own and tried to give them to Vasu.”Take these bangles,sell them and buy mangalyam for your sister.At my age,it does not matter if I don’t wear bangles.Take them”
Vasu remained quiet.It was not a new gesture from Visalam.Vasu had seen this many a times.Everytime he told her about his problems in not being able to do anything for his sisters,Visalam would remove her bangles and give them to him.He used to brush aside her gesture.
He again closed his eyes,to think,to plan how to meet this sudden expenditure.The thirumangalyam alone would cost him not less than four thousand rupees, then the new clothes and other things and th the train fare to go to <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comffice:smarttags" /><st1:City w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">Madurai</st1lace></st1:City> and return.
He could feel Kannamma’s presence near him and opened his eyes.Kannamma was extending a small jewel box before him.He took it and opened it.In the box was a thin gold chain.
“Let us take it to the shop where we bought this chain and exchange it for thirumangalyam.Don’t worry.Come on get ready,we will go to the shop.”Kannamma’s face was as calm and peaceful as it always was.Vasu went to the only bedroom the house had and lay on the bed.His eyes had become red and tears threatened to fall from there.”Kannamma,we bought this for our grandchild Kannamma who would be born anytime.I know how you struggled to save money to buy this chain and how many happy thoughts are woven with this chain,Kannamma .I can’t sell it,come what may”
Vsu’s voice choked.Kannamma came and sat beside him.Her fingers brushed his hair and the touch was so soothing to his senses.
“Look here.Yamuna is our daughter.Fortunately her in laws are also poor people like us.They don’t expect anything from us except our presence when they have naming ceremony for their grandchild.Besides there is plenty of time for that,God will show us the way.Now get ready,if we are five minutes late,gold price may double up”Kannamma laughed.Vasu was speechless.They went to the shop and bought the thirumangalyam selling the chain .
“Here look at thuis saree”They had finished dinner and had retired for the night.
“Here,see this saree and dhoti”Kannamma showed him a new saree and new dhothi.Kannamma’s cousin brother who was in Dubai and who visited her last month had given this saree and dhothi to them as a gift.Vasu had felt happy for Kannamma After a long time she got a new saree to wear.That was the one Kannamma had in her hands,”We will give this to Akka and athimber.Other things can easily be managed.I will take care of everything.You don’t worry”Kannamma smiled that divine smile which always melted Vasu’s heart.
He pulled her towards him,”Is it for this life that you married me,Kannamma?”his voice broke.
“No,it is for this”.Kannamma buried her face in his chest and again smiled with a deep blush on her face.There were sobs,sobs of ecstasy,there were tears, tears of true kappiness,tears born out of muuial love.This love is sublime,ageless.

Kannamma stood near him when he ot ready to elave for Madurai.Kannamma did not go with him.
“Will you be careful with your brother in law.Whatever he says,you should not get hurt.You should not pay attention to him,ok?”Kannamma’s face had become red,she had cried sometime back.She was anxious about what type of reception he would get in his sister’s house.Vasu’s brother in law was a boorish man,he would want to show off his riches and his well to do friends to Vasu.
“Look at me,Will you take care of yourself?”This time Kannamma actually shed tears.She continued,”I don’t want you to be hurt even for a second.Remember.I am always with you,no?”she took out his purse from his shirt pocket and opened it. There in one of the folds was Kannamma,smiling that divine smile, which never failed to soothen Vasu ‘s mind any time of the day or night.
“Remember Iam always with you,you should not feel sad,I will know the minute yu get hurt,whwerever you are,promise me that you won’t get hurt,I can’t bear that”Vasu took her hands and pressed them with his’.
“No,Kannamma,I won’t get hurt,don’t worry about me.”
He leftKannamma saying ‘bye ‘to him and watch him disappear at the street corner.

Vasu’s father passed away when he was in his school final.The responsibility of runnig the family,getting is three sisters,one elder to him and two younger sisters married and taking care of his mother fell on the young boy’s shoulders.But Vasu rose up to the challenge.He did odd jobs after school hours and earned some money,his father’s meager pension which his mother received helped tidy up the situation.Somehow he finished graduation and by God’s grace got a govenment job,eventhough at the lowest rung of the ladder.He was very focussed and was aware of his responsibilities.His elder sister attracted the attention of a well to do family.Their only son had lost his wife a couple of yeas after his marriage due to some illness.They approached Vasu for Kokila’s hands having seen her at a relative’s wedding.Vasu was reluctant.He thought that even if it took some years, he would get his sister married to some other boy,he was not keen to get his sister go to her in law’s house as the second wife.But Kokila had no problems about marrying this man,”He is well to do,Vasu.He will take care of me.I don’t have to ask you for a single saree as along as I live and that is enough for me”said Koki.

At the time of Koki’s marriage only,Visalam saw Kannamma.Her soft beauty,her simplicity attracted Visalam.She approached Kannamma’s parents through some relatives,Kannamma’s father who was a cook ,was only too happy to get his daughter married to Vasu.When Vasu looked at Kannamma for the first time he knew that he would either marry her or remain a bachelor through out his life.Later on Kannamma would tell him,”When I saw you for the first time,I knew instinctively that I was born as a woman only to be united with you.”
With two unmarried sisters,an elderly mother and a small house,privacy was a term unknown to Vasu and Kannamma.But the dark corners of their room,the terrace and the anteroom in the terrace bore testimony to the passionate love this couple carried in their hearts for each other.
Vasu got his other two sisters married and heaved a sigh of relief, when his daughter Yamuna attained age.In a couple of years he got his daughter married into a simple family,good people and the boy was teacher in a village school,Yamuna was a happy wife and was going to bcome a mother soon.

Vasu saw Kokila.s husband Santhanam sitting in the portico of his bungalow and holdingcourt with a few of his cronies,who thrived on the money he gave them now and then for their loyaly to him.Santhanam was a Mirasdhar,had landed property and had wealth that would take care of five generations from now.He was a boorish and proud man.When all his relatives were in awe of him,Vasu alone treated him as a brother in law,nothing more nothing less.For this reason alone,Santhanam disliked Vasu and never missed an opportunity to put him down in front of others.He did this in front of Kannamma when she accompanied Vasu to their house immediately after Kokila’s marriage to Santhanam and from then on she stopped going to their house and was petrified when Vasu went to their house .that Santhanam would humiliate her husband.

Santhanam never acknowledged Vasu entering his house,on the otherhand, he called out to his wife,”Koki your brother has come”he shouted to her.
The function was taking place.The Purohit asked,”Where is the ‘seer varisai’ from the mother’s house,mami.Please ask them to give them now”
Vasu took out the packet that had the new saree and blouse for his sister and dhoti and towel for his brother in law,he also handed over the jewel box containing the thirumangalyam to the purohit.Before the purohit could lay his hands on them,Santhanam took thenm from Vasu.He opened the packet,saw the saree and the dhothi in it and told Koki in a voice that could be heard by everybody pesent,”Koki,this saree is very cheap.You should not wear it and I won’t give such a dhoti to the servant in my house.Give them to our servants,understand?”
Next,he opened the box and took out the thirumangalyam.He inspected it gave it to his wife and said,”Keep it in ftront of Ambal in pooja room.My driver’s daughter is getting marriednext month,I will give it to him.”He called our to one of his brothers,”Dey,Ambi,bring the new clothes and the thirumangalyam that I have bought for this occasuion.”
Vasu’s face paled,his heart beat faster.he was on the vege of falling down,not being able to bear this pain of being humiated in the hall in front of everyone.But,Kannamma whispered to him,”You will not get hurt,no?Promise me,that you will not get hurt.You should not allow your brother in lw to hurt you.”Kannamma’s voice brought him back to hi senses.He retained the small smile that he always managed to have on his face when confronted by Santhanam.

The function was over,food was being served in the hall.Vasu wanted to leave by the next available bus.He sat down on the hall in front of one of the banana leaves that were laid and kept ready for food to be served.”Koki”cried out Santhanam,”Make your brother sit with Ganesh and Kumar.My friends are going to sit in the hall,Vasu can not sit with them”Ganesh was Santhanam’s driver and Kumar was their maid’s husband.Vasu’s face remained free of emotions.Quietly he went and sat in the back verandah with Ganesh and Kumar.
“Sir,I feel very sorry for you Sir,you should not have come at all Sir.This man is a boorish man SirPlease come with me Sir,You can sit in the kitchen Sir,I will seve you personally Sir”The cook’s voice was full of sympathy for Vasu because he was a poor father and had got four of his daughters married.He knew what it was to go to the sambhandhi;s house and be insulted there.
Vasu smiled,the same enchanting smile that irritated Santhanam.
“Mama,I have a splitting headache.I don’t think I can eat anything.Please give me a cup of hot coffee.The cook gave an understanding nd of his head and went to the kitchen.Vasu went and stood in the garden at the back of the house.His heart hurt.He did not feel for himself.But his entirebeing was on fire when he thought of the way Santhanam threw away the things that he brought as ‘seer ‘ for the function.
“Poor Kannamma”.he sighed.Kannamma did not buy anything for herself,so when her brother gave her this saree,Vasu was very happy.What a big heart she had to give away the only new saree she had, to her sister in law.With how much good will she exchanged the chain they had purchased for their grandchild for a thirumangalyam for his sister?.But all went in vain.They were spurned away.Vasu’s face lost colour,his eyes misted,he took out his purse and looked at Kannamma. She was there, smiling at him,”You should not get hurt.I can not bear to see your face so sad.Smile,please smile”Kannamma was putting her hands round his neck and laughing.Vasu also smiled,”No,Kannamma, Iam not hurt.I promise you,my dear I will not allow any one to hurt me”
Kokila came to him carrying a big packet with sweets and savouries for him to carry home .
“Koki,you know that Amma and I are diabetic.We don’t eat sweets and Kannamma does not even look at snacks.So why waste them,give them to your servants.Atleast they will eat”.
Vasu stood at the bus stop.He was feeling terrible.Again, he took out his purse and looked at Kannamma ,his Kannamma .He could not bear his hurt any longer,he hugged the photo tight to his chest and tears welled in his eyes,”No,Kannamma,Iam not hurt.I will not allow anyone to hurt me.Don’t worry,Kannamma,when you are with me,how can anyone hurt me?”his chest heaved.An auto driver who was standing nearby saw Vasu and came running to him
“Sir,what is the matter with you,Are you alright?”
“Iam quite ok,just a little tired,that’s all” ​

He got into the bus that came presently.
Kannamma who was lying next to her MIL in the hall keeping her ears tuned to the sounds on the street,got up suddenly.She knew by instinct that Vasu had entered their street and was walking towards home.She rushed to the door,opened it and looked out,Vasu was walking towards home.Their eyes interlocked.Vasu waited impatiently to hold his wife in his arms and Kannamma waited to wipe the sweat and tears away from his face.
“Is it possible for a man who is almost fifty five years old to love his wife so intensely?”
“Yes,yes” nodded the parijatham tree,in one of the gardens adjoining the street and bent its head,shedding its flowers ,with divine fragrance , and paying homage to this wonderful manifestation of love.
“Is it possible for a man and woman to be so devoted to each other after so many years of marriage?”
“Yes,yes”chanted the bells that were t ied to the neck of a cow, that was returning home to her master’s shed.
“Is it possible for love to win over poverty,hurt and humiliation and emerge stronger and victorious?”
“Yes,yes”answeed the bells that rang during the night arathi in a nearby temple.
Vasu entered the house,took Kannamma in his arms,she held her head on his sgoulders and sighed .
Blessed are the couple who carry this divine love in their hearts for each other.
Blessed are the people who have witnessed such pure love.
Blessed Iam for knowing Vasu and Kannamma.​

Thirumangalyam-Thali (given from the mother's side)
Seer varisai-----Gifts given by particularly mother's side and other relatives.




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My dear brindha,
Iam blessed to have such wonderful friends,my child,to showerme with your love and kind words of appreciation.brindha,I have seen husband and wife sacrificing their basic needs fr the sake of family in their young days.When they reach the old age it is their lve for each other that keeps them going.
Thank you for your wonderful words.
lots of love
mithila kannan

 

My dar dream girl,
Iam a great devotee of Sri.Subramaniya Bharathi.Loved his Kannamma songs.I wanted to name my heroine Kannamma.What I have written happen in our middle class families my friend.that is the beauty and privelege of being born in this country.Husband and wife are there for each other through thick and thin and that love is something even the Gods might envy.
My dear friend,Iam only priveleged to be with you all and enjoy this unconditional from all of you.
God bless you,my child.
love
mithila kannan

 

My dar dream girl,
Iam a great devotee of Sri.Subramaniya Bharathi.Loved his Kannamma songs.I wanted to name my heroine Kannamma.What I have written happen in our middle class families my friend.that is the beauty and privelege of being born in this country.Husband and wife are there for each other through thick and thin and that love is something even the Gods might envy.
My dear friend,Iam only priveleged to be with you all and enjoy this unconditional from all of you.
God bless you,my child.
love
mithila kannan

 

My dear Kamalji,
Thank you for the heartfelt words.God does compensate us in many ways.Strange are the words of God.
God wanted you to enjoy your later years in peace and in luxury.May be he gave you tough times when you had the strength to bear them.Your wife Harsha,stood by you in all those years lending support and that love always remains fresh,spreading its fragrance even when you are old.
You are saying repeatedly,that you are an old man.You are not old,how can you be old when I.who is like your mother feels so young with all of you by my side.
Please do not think about the past and its hurtful days,happy days are here for you to stay with you always.
Regards
mythili