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The Graceful exit!

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Devika Menon, Jul 1, 2008.

  1. Devika Menon

    Devika Menon Gold IL'ite

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    THE GRACEFUL EXIT


    Vanaja bowed to the audience as they applauded her wonderful performance. Backstage Pavithra looked in complete awe for the millionth time at her mother dancing .Her mother was her Guru, her role model. She did begin to feel the sensations of nervousness as she wondered how was she going to perform after a veteran like her mother. She wiped the first signs of her nervous sweat from her forehead as Vanaja very gracefully exited the stage as the announcer welcomed Pavithra.

    Though Pavithra felt wobbly as she walked on stage but once the music began and she started performing she was so intensely involved that she completely forgot about the fact that there were thousands watching her .Pavithra gave a splendid performance, her first and the audiences were wonderstruck by her flawless performance

    A virtuoso performance. She received a standing ovation and Vanaja felt a deep pricking sensation in her heart. Yet she forced a smile as Pavithra came running towards her, hugging her so tight, with all the love and adulation. “Thank you MA, it’s all because of you that I could be here today”. Vanaja wrenched out of her clasp, looked at her and smiled, a smile that refused to reach her eyes. People flocked to them and showered compliments to Vanaja, but not about her about her daughter. Pavithra was glowing , she was so happy . So thrilled to know that her dream had actually come true. She was happy to know that her mother would be so proud of her.

    On the way home Pavithra said, “Mom I am so glad that we performed together. I was so nervous but I think I did a decent job. What do you think Ma?” “Mmmm Pavi I have a headache , can we talk tomorrow?” she said putting a stop to any further discussion about the performance which disturbed her. She alighted from the car and walked towards the gate, her aloofness all too evident that left Pavi wondering what led to it.

    In her room Vanaja, sighed looking at herself in the mirror., thinking of the various compliments that she had to acknowledge today that weren’t for her but for Pavithra , and till yesterday they were all meant for her.

    She felt a tinge of something in her, what was it, anger? No, Irritation?, No, Tiredness? No exasperation? No frustration? No, then what was it?? . She knew it but wasn’t letting it come out, emerge, show. Not letting it surface because she feared it would hamper her character no not in the eyes of others but in her own eyes. Yes she knew what it was …it was envy.

    She felt tears pricking her eyes as she remembered the day she stood in front of a mirror like this, watching the reflection of her mother as she cried on the bed. Her mother Meenakshi had been a danseuse and a renowned one at that. Dance ran in the family and boasted of wonderful performers. The day she danced for the first time with her mother, she saw the same jealousy in her mother’s eyes, her words, her aloofness. Infact her mother had cried in front of her showing her disapproval in her daughter trespassing the area of life that had once been ruled by her. After that day her mother found it very difficult to come to terms with her waning popularity and her daughters rising one. She reduced her visits to her daughter and gradually died in solitude. Infact initially her aloofess and her indifference towards Vanaja, had a very bad effect in her dancing till she met Naresh whom she later married and reinstilled her devotion to dance. She felt her life was incomplete without dance and when she danced she felt one with God. There was something so very holy, so pure, so supreme about dancing that it brought her to life.

    No Vanaja, wouldn’t let that happen. She looked at herself in the mirror and hated herself for being what she had since yesterday. Naresh would never forgive her. He lived abroad and knew she would do complete justice in bringing up Pavi and here she was on the verge on breaking that trust. No she wouldn’t do that.

    She let herself off the feeling of jealousy and welcomed the onset of pride. She admitted to herself and knew that this would take time to sink in, to be absorbed and accepted but she had started it. She decided it would be difficult no doubt to exit gracefully from Numero uno, but she must make way for others and essentially for her child. She felt the guilt in her daughter words of good night before retiring, would she stifle the bud before its bloom? No she wouldn’t she would definitely not allow that. She would not be another Meenakshi , she would be Vanaja, she would make way for Pavithra gracefully! A mother must never envy her daughter. How can she? It is a sin, an unforgivable one. History will not repeat itself. Vanaja wouldn’t allow it. No she would not!!

    She felt better. She knew she had made the right decision. A person cannot always reign, A person must know when its time to move on. Its time to make way. Time for that graceful exit!! No she would not exit from dance. Dance is her form of worship and would always be an integral part of her life but she would exit from envy, from greed, from the numero uno!!

    Early morning, the next day, she got up and went with the tray of tea to Pavi‘s room. “Hey Pavi. Wake up dear. I have so much to talk and listen to” .She said effusively. Pavi got up, smiled and hugged her Mother and the house was filled with reverberating sounds of laughter, and excited chatter for a long long time… ….


    Envy the most common of human emotions has been instrumental in marring lovely relations, between mother and daughter, father and son, siblings, friends and of course spouses etc. The sooner we realize that the envy or its step sister jealousy is bound to ruin us , its better to pause and think, “Is it all worth it ? After all in the end you don’t take all this with you but instead leave behind beautiful memories for others to cherish.” So let the moments be beautiful for all and let there be place for all to live in our hearts harmoniously!

    Love,
    Devika
     
    Last edited: Jul 1, 2008
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  2. Gowri66

    Gowri66 Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Devika Menon,

    Wow !! Beautiful write up !! Gracefully written too !!

    I was moved by these words : In a nutshell : You have explained, what really a life is ?:exactly:

    "Envy the most common of human emotions has been instrumental in marring lovely relations, between mother and daughter, father and son, siblings, friends etc. The sooner we realize that the envy or its step sister jealousy is bound to ruin us , its better to pause and think, “Is it all worth it ? After all in the end you don’t take all this with you but instead leave behind beautiful memories for others to cherish.” So let the moments be beautiful for all and let there be place for all to live in our hearts harmoniously! "

    Great !! :iagree
     
  3. pavithrasriram

    pavithrasriram Bronze IL'ite

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    hi devika,
    i was looking forward to your post and it was worth the wait!!!
    very well written post!!!!
    yes,definitely people remember us for the things we do.so why not be it good memories!!!!!!:)
    regards
    pavi
     
  4. Jithiks

    Jithiks Gold IL'ite

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    Dearest Chechi,

    I read your narration about envy in one go ! It was loaded with meaning and clarity ! Envy is a refined word for jealousy which when allowed to grow can mar lovely relations !

    I am so happy that Vanaja nipped her envy at the budding stage and over came those negative emotions stemming up !! Good for her and Pavithra :)

    Personally, I've seen this happen among relations and friends and left me speechless. We would have witnessed such affectionate display of love and affection for many years, but ruined in a split second due to envy/jealousy !! Never ceases to shock me !

    Another is the trend among actors, actresses, singers (many who are in limelight) who never wish to acknowledge that they are growing old and with age needs to come grace and dignity ! Contrary to this, many end up making a mockery of themselves trying to compete with the younger generations in terms of makeup, dresses and actions etc.

    Why is it so difficult to feel happy for others and openly praise them? What is stopping us?

    I think that invisible veil we've created around us need to come down . Only then, one can praise,empathize and whole heartedly rejoice in others happiness.

    Excellent write up Chechi, as always !! :) And yes, I admit, I felt tear drops at the corner of my eyes by the end of the story ! {everytime I start reading your story/poem I brace myself not to cry or filled with emotion..but it beats me !! }

    Love
    Krithika
     
  5. dream.girl

    dream.girl Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Devika,

    :clap:clap:clap Wonderfully written..

    U had touched a really very sensitive issue,no matter it is between mother-daughter, son-father or b/w siblings,There is always a pinch of envy bubbles when one being the most praised in the same field and perhaps if they take it as a godthing and do worship it.As you narrated it is also very true that our loving ones negative shades will vanish in a sec..and they will be along with us to encourage,make us to move more forward...

    U´r story takes me back to my teens when I used to feel so Jealous of my mom as she is very very fair and I look like my dad so brown skinned(of course I scolded god alsobonk)

    Hahaha Now I laugh abt it and teases my lovely mom that ur more beautiful than me and I can´t walk beside u....Big LaughBig LaughBig Laugh

    U´r story gives a eye opening moral saying“Is it all worth it ?..BowBowBow

    Thanq for sharing and would like to have more!!


    Hugs,
    dg..
     
    Last edited: Jul 1, 2008
  6. sundarusha

    sundarusha Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Devikamenon,

    glad to know that Vanaja did not nip the bud in its bloom. In the end, it is the memories that remain, so why not make them pleasant ones? Just like in the photo album, we tried to save good pictures only. We get rid of those that did not come out well.IN the same way, only good memories should be left for others to cherish.
     
  7. Shetal

    Shetal New IL'ite

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    AWESOME....beautiful write up and soooo true!

    You have captured a true human emotion in your write up!!!

    Great story Devika!

    Kind Rgds
    Shetal
     
  8. uncannybal

    uncannybal Senior IL'ite

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    Devika

    Indeed rivalry within siblings or family members is so counter productive. Family should always stay together no matter what. When u have each other its so much easier to fight the world


    love
    Santosh
    Devikas fan
     
  9. Kamla

    Kamla IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Devika,

    A well told story, of course it has to be, coming from you!

    I see you are exploring different areas of life. A little rare to read about the envy of a mother towards her daughter. I would have never thought it possible, being a mom to two girls. It is common amongst siblings, but this is a new take. But then, why not? We come in many shapes and forms, right?!

    May be it is a bit like handing over the office to your offspring, which although willingly done by the parent, a certain hesitation is bound to be present.

    Well, all is well that ends well and thank God Vanaja could control her feelings, especially as she herself has been a victim of it.

    L, Kamla
     
  10. Anandchitra

    Anandchitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Devika
    Very well written story.. as always. You are a master at this or should I say mistress.. not sure of the correct word. But very well told story.Bow.... Great work!
     

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