I am ready

Dear Mam.

Thats nice to hear about that particular community, As you have already stated that was important those days because of childhood marraiges...

But Today, parents decide the time of marraige by their age..
Today 's girls/guys are much much better than the older genrations, they are aware of eveything about maariage they are mentally prepared too... When she/he has the desire to get married and she/he wants to have a new chapter in her life ....She/He is READY... Without anybody's help also..that too girls today have the courage to face everything...

Nice topic sreeni...
now after 22 years of being happily married i often say that i was not"ready" for marriage when i did get married...nobody asked me if i was ready...i had finished graduation..was doing my CA...and it was taken for granted that if we found a groom and his parents who were supportive of me continuing my CA...i would get married...and bang the first guy i met was an answer to all my parents prayers...i was such a nutcase did not even know what to expect from the guy i married...when i was asked i said yeah he is nice to talk to. and has a great sense of humour......I just drifted into it and really "grew up " only after marriage...luckily he turned out to be a nice person with whom i have spent the last twenty years...but in the case of my dd will definitely ask her if she is ready for it ......and find out all her expectations...planning so meticulously for her ...but wouldnt be surprised if she suddenly announces that amma i am marrying so and so...hahaha...nowadays kids....

Mindi

Hi Sriniketan

Well these days do you think people have time to train on the issues mentioned?
According to me its a "on-the-job training"!!
and In life marriage is such an institution wher you can learn only with experience, wisdom as well as by following certain examples. and by training one can definitely not lead a perfect life

Its all the mental maturity of both the persons involved.....as days pass by , we learn to adjust, agree what we used to disagree, compromise with less important things amd many more.....such things can never be trained

and theese days the technology is making life move faster as well as lifestyle is getting changed!!
So lets assume you are trained for a particular lifestyle by your mom, then by the time you ra married , its a lot of time n lifestyle has changed, you cant go back and have different training then

Those days lifestyles did not have such drastic changes and thus probably training was a possible thing...certainly not now!!

Cheers!!
Anu

Dear Sriniketan,

Thanks for your comments.By the way to refresh yourselves with the good old songs check aahaafm.com.

dear srini,

sometime i blame myself, and the present parents for the late marriage we do not want our children to take up the burden of understanding at an age they should more worry about all round developments and by the time the developments are over they have too over grown to decide to marry and come up with i want him to be like this and tall secured, handsome and intelligent and i think all the dictionary of a well bred man, now one cannot get all these at one go, so none is ready and never will be.

to put this in a raw manner nowadays marriage has been compared to the bollywood casting couch they want a ready made bride and too good in all the fields including bed, now where is the time for all round developments in all the field, none is ready any time...in those days because parents hurried many married, given the days choice all want babies but no man..yenna kodumai daa..sunkan

in today's TOI they say all divorces can be blamed to the hindu marriage act as there is no proper provision and all is biased and based on man's ego, so if equal right comes through it has to be seen.. u see any light at the end of this tunnel..sk

I agree with Sharada, who made a very pertintent point.i endorse what she said.Regards.kamal

Dear Sri
Did you notice now a day someone gives fbs only on such topics where MIL amd DIL is included are you ready to get married and all............hahahaha hope you understood whom I'm talking about
ok I think now a days one gets ready only when one is ready to face the challenge in life who is matured not only by age but also by mind.

Varloo,
Accept my belated Wedding Anniversary wishes...
nice to see that you had very well prepared yourself for that important happening in one's life...glad to see that you had your way in getting ready..we should be atleast be ready to accept some facts of life that comes along...

sriniketan

Brinda,
I was not pointing to any community here...it is a norm to give advice to the bride, how to behave and so on...that was the fact I was referring to..
Yeah, nowadays both the boys and girls are ready, when they think they are ready...
By age, all are ready, but their preparedness to face a new chapter in their life is important..true..

sriniketan

Mindi,
I was also on the same boat like you, readied only by age...got advice from all quarters how to run a family and so on...luckily as you had said, my dh did not have many expectations from me (good for me isn't it) otherwise ....it would be like all the time..
My daughters have already given their preferances like how the groom should and matters like that..I didn't even remember that I talked with my parents on such matters..as you had mentioned...nowadays kids...

sriniketan