Unsigned MOU between my mother and mother in law

Dear Malathi,
You naughty girl! What a marvellous suggestion! Any way the MOU you have suggested will definitely be applicable to modern times.
Love,
PS

Dear Mrs.Pushpavalli Srinivasan,
I enjoyed reading this article,brought back memories of my mother to me.We are vaishnavites.My mother strictly followed the sampradhayams.But she never imposed her ideas or faiths on others so the sailing was smooth during marriages.She would eat only fruit and have some milk and nobody the wiser when she visited relatives houses.
Fortunately for me my MIL never observes any of these formalities so I have almost forgotten the formalities'
There are vaishnavites who do not go to Shiva ,Murugan and Pillaiyar temples.But both in my mother's house and inlaw's house no such difference in worshipping Gods prevail.
I would like to share an incident that happened in my life when I was a young woman.My husband and I were at Hubli.My daughter was a couple of months old.My husband came home from office,one day and informed me that his boss's mother in law would be coming over to our place and take rest for a couple of ours before proceeding to Goa,
where my husband's boss was living.
My husband told me,"Mythili,this elderly (they are vaishnavites) lady is very orthodox I belelieve,so take bath and be sure to wear 'madi' clothes before you enter the kitchen.I said,"Fine".On the particular day,I had ny bath,wore 'madi'clothes and prepared beakfast and lunch for her.The child was fully taken care of by my maid.
The elderly lady,my husband's boss's Mil arrived.I remember her demeanour even now.She was so kind and affectionate to me.When I requested her to have breakfast she point blank refused.No amount of persuasion worked with her.I did not know what to do.Seeing my face,she said,"Mythili,you have taken pains to make so many items for me.Sorry I don't eat out,but I will have coffee "she took out her silver tumbler and poured down the coffee that I made in that tumbler and drank it.
Had she shown the slightest of aloofness or holier than thou attitude at that time I would have shrugged of the incident and would have forgotten all about it.But she was very kind,very friendly,me being a young mother gave me umpteen tips on cooking for my child.She even made 'kathirikai rasavanhi'for me in the short time that she spent in our house.
I appreciate the way your MIL and mother resolved the issue of your having to cook for them when they visited each other's houses.I particularly liked your MILs idea that she would attend functions at her end and you would attend functions at your end.Very pratical indded.
Regards
mithila kannan

Hi Pushpavalli
I don't have any such MOU's but the way you have written was so interesting to read. It looks like you MIL was a very broadminded and very adjustable person.

Dear Maithili,
Thank you for sharing your experience here. After reading your stories I assumed that you belonged to our sect. In our family also we do not follow rigid rules like not visiting Siva temples etc. My hubby was treasurer at a Murugan temple for nearly twenty years at Jamshedpur. Both my mother and mother in law were adjusting types. But my mother in law observed madi. When my children were small she would cook in the morning time as we had salagramam in our house. Thank you for joining here,
Love,
PS

Dear Aruna,
Thank you for your appreciation. I was really lucky to have a broadmindedmil.
Love,
PS

Dear Pushpa Madam,

enjoyed your post...nice to know that ur MIL Was a very adjustable person.

Dear Saikripa,
Glad to know that you enjoyed this thread. Thank you for peeping in posting your FB,
Love, PS

Dear PS,

Very nice to read about the MOU. Your mil was surely a nice lady at heart and very practical too. Of course, your Mom was equally modern and open in her thinking to use customs to make relationships easy rather than stressful.

Many times customs make things complicated and one-sided. It is indeed very nice to read that both your mil and your Mom made things work so well between each other.

I don't have any MOUs to share but I loved reading yours.

Malathijagan, I think the MOU suggested by you will be accepted whole-heartedly by both parties! What a brilliant one!

Mythili M'am, nice to read the incident narrated by you too.

SS

Dear SS,
Thank you for stepping in and posting your FB. I feel that the younger generation will whole heartedly support Malathi.s suggestion, but I can't vouch for the other party.

If we want to have a peaceful life we have to make lot of compromises. But I have heard people saying, " Why should I compromise?"
Thank you ,
PS

Originally Posted by soaringspirit

Dear PS,

Very nice to read about the MOU. Your mil was surely a nice lady at heart and very practical too. Of course, your Mom was equally modern and open in her thinking to use customs to make relationships easy rather than stressful.

Many times customs make things complicated and one-sided. It is indeed very nice to read that both your mil and your Mom made things work so well between each other.

I don't have any MOUs to share but I loved reading yours.

Malathijagan, I think the MOU suggested by you will be accepted whole-heartedly by both parties! What a brilliant one!

Mythili M'am, nice to read the incident narrated by you too.

SS