The Single Child Syndrome

Dear Mithila,
Ohh.. Thank you so much..I'm so elated to learn that you look forward for my Feedbacks..What more can i ask for? You , being such a prolific writer looking out for my F.B's that serves as a tonic! Please accept this.I'm so honoured.Yes, Thank god that "girl" is not ready to get married, so in a way its good.Thanks for your words.

Originally Posted by mithila kannan

Dear aishu,
Thank you dear for those inspiring words.I always look forward to your fb,that serves as my tonic,boosts up my energy and spirits.
Yes girls who do not get guidance from their parents particularly if they happen to be single children face tough times once they get married.Thank HGod that the girl you mentioned was not in a hurry to get married with that frame of mind.Once she understands what life is all about and realises the importance of give and take in family life she should ofcourse get married and be happy as every humanbeing is entitled to be happy.
mithila kannan

Dear Mithila Madam,
I have been reading all your posts.You have a flair of writing and you have the capacity to grip the readers.This is my first post.I read the on the day you had first posted it.I stopped myself from writing the comment because i was fuming and i may rush into rude comments.Today im a bit composed.Well..u have chosen a topic to write.I appreciate that.But what bothers me in most of u r posts is that u share some of others lfestyle and their happenings which i dont like.You have every right to share u r story.Not X or Y.
I pity the parents of those girls/boys who u have mentioned in this post not because their kids got divorced but u have used them to teach others a lesson.Its really hurting.If given a chance i would think twice(or more) to come and mingle with u.Who knows u may write about me,my parents,my parenting skills,my grooming skills and what not..in u r next post and get appreciated.Please stick to your topic without bringing in your friends/relative as examples atleast for a bad one.This is my humnle request.U may ask you should i bother to comment if u do not like them..but i just couldnt hold it,..Hope you understand what im trying to tell.

Dear Mithila.

You are so right.I see a lot of pampered kids these days, given the best.But they are brats, who are used to having their way in life, which proves their undoing when they get married and have to adjust with their partner.

Let ur child flower after he or she gets married and dont interfere in their married lives.My daughter is married abroad, and i dont call her up for weeks on end, bcs i want her to get used to her inlaws , who are as it is wonderful, and my SIL a gem.They keep calling, and sometimes i think i am a miser not calling them.But it is best to let them get adjusted .The more we call, the more she will be distracted this side.

Regards.kamal

My dear Supriya dinesh,
I always write in first person.Thats where Iam comfortable.I don't know how you got the impression that I use my relatives and my friends and their families for cheap popularity.Whatever I have written are fictitious and not at all about real people.Iam a senior citizen with two married daughters and I have gone thro' so much pain in my life.What if somebody known to my family write about me?Do you have any inkling at all about what you are saying my dear.At this stage in my life,I dont have to get kick out of life by writing about others and quoting them as examples.Still Iam wondering that you read all my posts and I am using people.I don't know whrther to cry or laugh.
I wrote a story in sulekha"Ambujam Mami...."purely fictional,again in first person.There I had mentioned that the lady lived in Perambur near my sister's house,fictional.A gentleman wrote to me,"I was also in perambur,mythili,I never heard of any such family"I wrote to him that the character was fictional.
I sincerely feel that you could have verified with me whether I use my relatives and my friends or acquaintances for my stories atleast in a more humane manner I dont expect respect from unknown people, before going on a tirade and being so rude.
mithila kannan

My dear Kamalji,
You are right.We have to be careful in bringing up children and showing them affection.
My hands are writing Kamalji but Iam very badly hurt.If you go thro' the FBs you will know.It will take me time to get over it.
I thank you for your presence in my il life.
mithila kannan

Originally Posted by mithila kannan

My dear Kamalji,
You are right.We have to be careful in bringing up children and showing them affection.
My hands are writing Kamalji but Iam very badly hurt.If you go thro' the FBs you will know.It will take me time to get over it.
I thank you for your presence in my il life.
mithila kannan

Dear Mithila,

what is FB ? Cheer up , my fair lady.Read my latest blog, that is my medication for u today.You write lovely stories, and would make a good script writer.Cheer up.Rgds.kamal

Dear SupriyaDinesh,

I understand what you are getting at. If MithilaKannan was writing episodes from her life based on all her relatives and friends, what you are saying here justifies. But before we go blaming her, we should check the facts first. That is my humble opinion.
What you say is true, MithilaKannan has a flair for writing and most of her write ups are based on the real world around us. So much so, we start identifying with them.
Reading one of her earlier pieces, even I thought it was a portrayal of what she experienced in real life. But she soon cleared my doubts saying it was a fiction of her imagination!
All writers base their thoughts on some real incidents which have left an impression on their fertile minds..barring those who write pure fantasies like Alice in Wonderland or Harry Potter-for example.
Also MithilaKannan writes in first person, giving her stories a ring of reality. It goes to show her excellent ability to write.
Her little stories may be based on real incidents that she perhaps has witnessed or experienced...or...maybe they are pure fiction coming out of her thoughts. Whatever, her stories are fictionalised and as such cannot hurt anyone. On the other hand, as most of them are woman centric and includes problems and situations that any of us can face in our real lives, it helps as a guideline for many to deal when they happen to face them.
That you have felt the way you have goes to show how real she can portray her fiction.
It is one more feather to her already heavy hat!

L, Kamla

Originally Posted by SupriyaDinesh

Dear Mithila Madam,
I have been reading all your posts.You have a flair of writing and you have the capacity to grip the readers.This is my first post.I read the on the day you had first posted it.I stopped myself from writing the comment because i was fuming and i may rush into rude comments.Today im a bit composed.Well..u have chosen a topic to write.I appreciate that.But what bothers me in most of u r posts is that u share some of others lfestyle and their happenings which i dont like.You have every right to share u r story.Not X or Y.
I pity the parents of those girls/boys who u have mentioned in this post not because their kids got divorced but u have used them to teach others a lesson.Its really hurting.If given a chance i would think twice(or more) to come and mingle with u.Who knows u may write about me,my parents,my parenting skills,my grooming skills and what not..in u r next post and get appreciated.Please stick to your topic without bringing in your friends/relative as examples atleast for a bad one.This is my humnle request.U may ask you should i bother to comment if u do not like them..but i just couldnt hold it,..Hope you understand what im trying to tell.

Dear Supriya,

It is always interesting when members offer an alternative opinion in a thread running in one direction. And it is particularly heartening to see that you have spoken openly and clearly, in the spirit of free expression in IL.

You have expressed a mild disagreement to the fact that the lead post by mithilakannan talks about the experiences of others (that is, not the personal stories of the author). And you have every right to raise a question that vexes you.

Most writers borrow themes and characters from their families, friends and society at large when they write their stories. Even our resident writers like Varalotti and Cheeniyasir have mentioned this in their posts. For the writer, the world is a playing field. So, what Mithila has done is not new or forbidden. Moreover, Mithila has presented this lead post in the docu-fiction genre. So, she has to use real life examples to high light her analysis.

Now, you have raised another very pertinent point about the privacy of the persons concerned. That is true. But the names used in the lead post are changed and I am sure most (almost all) of us in IL have no idea who the real persons are.

IL is always happy to see free spirited discussions and contrasting views are most welcome, especially when expressed within the ambit of Forum Etiquette.

regards
Vidya

Originally Posted by SupriyaDinesh

Dear Mithila Madam,
I have been reading all your posts.You have a flair of writing and you have the capacity to grip the readers.This is my first post.I read the on the day you had first posted it.I stopped myself from writing the comment because i was fuming and i may rush into rude comments.Today im a bit composed.Well..u have chosen a topic to write.I appreciate that.But what bothers me in most of u r posts is that u share some of others lfestyle and their happenings which i dont like.You have every right to share u r story.Not X or Y.
I pity the parents of those girls/boys who u have mentioned in this post not because their kids got divorced but u have used them to teach others a lesson.Its really hurting.If given a chance i would think twice(or more) to come and mingle with u.Who knows u may write about me,my parents,my parenting skills,my grooming skills and what not..in u r next post and get appreciated.Please stick to your topic without bringing in your friends/relative as examples atleast for a bad one.This is my humnle request.U may ask you should i bother to comment if u do not like them..but i just couldnt hold it,..Hope you understand what im trying to tell.

Thank you Kamla,
Your words came like balm to my hurt feelings.Actually I shouldn't be hurting so much,as a writer I should get used to brickbats and bouques as well.Now I have put the hurt behind me.I have to write,thats like breathing fior me,my conscience knows that I dont take real life people as examples,so it is alright.
Thanks once again
mithila kannan

Dear Mithila,

I am surprised that a lady of your stature is daunted by a feedback. As a matter of fact, you have to be thankful to Supriya because she has come out openly with her thoughts about your writings. Who knows, there may be many who might entertain the same doubts and do not express for the fear of creating bad vibes.
At least now, you have been given a platform to clear her doubts and clear any such apprehensions that others too may have!!
You have yourself to blame Mithila!!!! BECAUSE, you write so well. You write in first person and your characters and situations are so real that we feel that you have just got back from Hyderabad celebrating an Iyengar wedding and so on and so forth :))
Mithila, even if you did base your fiction on some real incident, it is still praiseworthy because when you present it in the fictional form here, it is a help for others who may face such situations in real life. The readers not only get to enjoy a good story, but also end up learning something from it.
So Mithila, let adverse criticism not daunt you. Like Kamalji has said, trod ahead and we at IL are only too eager to read your writings.

With love,
Kamla

Originally Posted by mithila kannan

My dear Supriya dinesh,
I always write in first person.Thats where Iam comfortable.I don't know how you got the impression that I use my relatives and my friends and their families for cheap popularity.Whatever I have written are fictitious and not at all about real people.Iam a senior citizen with two married daughters and I have gone thro' so much pain in my life.What if somebody known to my family write about me?Do you have any inkling at all about what you are saying my dear.At this stage in my life,I dont have to get kick out of life by writing about others and quoting them as examples.Still Iam wondering that you read all my posts and I am using people.I don't know whrther to cry or laugh.
I wrote a story in sulekha"Ambujam Mami...."purely fictional,again in first person.There I had mentioned that the lady lived in Perambur near my sister's house,fictional.A gentleman wrote to me,"I was also in perambur,mythili,I never heard of any such family"I wrote to him that the character was fictional.
I sincerely feel that you could have verified with me whether I use my relatives and my friends or acquaintances for my stories atleast in a more humane manner I dont expect respect from unknown people, before going on a tirade and being so rude.
mithila kannan