Do You Seek A Winning Horse

DO YOU SEEK A WINNING HORSE ?

Today morning my servant’s mom devi dropped in, I knew she is always a trouble shooter whenever she arrives she has something up her sleeves, and I was right on dot, this time it was that she wanted her daughter of 16 but looked too undernourished for her age to take up a job as a baby sitter with a salary too good to be true…

Indu came to us when she was around just 12 and year by year graduated to do all the work that is now. Indu cannot do without poori from the hotel for breakfast and now we have forgotten the cost but pamper the child..Though indu cannot handle all things together, she would break the coffee mugs or the vase and it was always something expensive going down the drain. Made me wonder she for baby sitting my god! Who knows how many things will see this state in the new house.

With a horse one needs to groom and spend enough to keep it fit for the race, but here do we consider this option when our subordinates have to give their best do we consider their mental health and take care of it, pressure is always on the rise, no matter what, we must win, we bet our lives on it.

Haven’t we come across a parent expecting his children to study well so they get good salaried jobs, go abroad and earn well to raise our standard too, we goad them into doing many things like they must be an engineer or a doctor and wait for the winner in them. We seek the horse to go on, and make a brilliant silver line in our life.

The IT booms have taught the managers to seek for the winning horse without contribution much. Our expectations in life is a winning horse in a wife or a husband, we try to catch the best, reading the status salary and so on but, let us take a small breather, do we get the peace that is associated with good life, are we able to lay back and relax that we have enough and need not bother much for the future.

Like how people keep grooming new horses for the next win, if one is
Lagging behind one more is ready, no time to recoup or care for, one is dropped for the next best available. The winning horse is always on the move; give way if you are not one…sunkan

Very well written ..I have to agree many so seek a winning horse..for many years it was tough for me to decide if I should push my kid like all other mothers were doing or just be..I finally decided to just let the child be..he is doing well and I insist on him taking life easy and not get all pressured about being first in class..I am definetly in the minority here as all other moms go carzy pushing their kids to academic excellence..so I do think most everyone do seek a winning horse..

Originally Posted by anandchitra

Very well written ..I have to agree many so seek a winning horse..for many years it was tough for me to decide if I should push my kid like all other mothers were doing or just be..I finally decided to just let the child be..he is doing well and I insist on him taking life easy and not get all pressured about being first in class..I am definetly in the minority here as all other moms go carzy pushing their kids to academic excellence..so I do think most everyone do seek a winning horse..

Dear AC,
it has become very normal in bangalore to read an engineer commits suicide, and i alway keep wondering why the academic being added, SWE, and so on, there are so many now, that engineering is loosing its charm, even a postgraduate who speaks fluently in English are our auto drivers and vegetable vendors, that is the state of all those driving forces behind these horses that are running to convince.
in the end take up what ever is available to survive. The young mothers should let the children have a chance, concentrate more on their freedom of selection in academics and profession too, that way we help them keep from strained atmosphere, and i think the other fields will get alive with this,like the sports, scientific ventures,music, arts and paintings, all will get creative, we do not ask a child to start with calculations but give crayons when too young, so then why should we burden them with our ambitions and leave a permanent stress for life...sunkan

Hi sunkan,

I always worry am i stupid for not following all the mother's i come across. I know a friend who has mapped her son's education, career, job prospects.. when he was 2 years..he will study in this particular school, get into a engineering college, then get a job with the leading it company. there is another friend of mine, whose husband openly tells, i don't have any intentions of spending money on my son's to pursue in engineering, let them do the cheap bcom..and then do ca, icwa...(B.Com is one of the highly demanded course which has a cut off demand, that even engineering does not require)

I allow my children to pursue what they want. don't stress on studies much. I prefer them to learn,observe and then pursue things...after all winning is not everything right....

Originally Posted by shanvy

Hi sunkan,

I always worry am i stupid for not following all the mother's i come across. I know a friend who has mapped her son's education, career, job prospects.. when he was 2 years..he will study in this particular school, get into a engineering college, then get a job with the leading it company. there is another friend of mine, whose husband openly tells, i don't have any intentions of spending money on my son's to pursue in engineering, let them do the cheap bcom..and then do ca, icwa...(B.Com is one of the highly demanded course which has a cut off demand, that even engineering does not require)

I allow my children to pursue what they want. don't stress on studies much. I prefer them to learn,observe and then pursue things...after all winning is not everything right....

very correct shanthi,
let the base be flexible for them to jump back, not rigid sunkan

dear sunkan ma'am,

i always feel children have to enjoy their childhood.....
we should not tax them too much with our ambitions.
we should always think according to their age, their capacity, their talents. but what we do is the other way,
ie we expect a 5 year old child has to behave like a 28 year old adult . which is not at all sensible and applicable .to pressurise the child.
let us treat children as children let them have all the freedom as children we have to teach them the ethics, confidence, human values, etc.,

as parents let us expect our children to become good citizens of this universe first

the rest all happens according to our genes the good imprints and the bad imprints in our soul.
yes genes play a vital role in one's life.

cheers
padma

Originally Posted by padmavathi m

dear sunkan ma'am,

i always feel children have to enjoy their childhood.....
we should not tax them too much with our ambitions.
we should always think according to their age, their capacity, their talents. but what we do is the other way,
ie we expect a 5 year old child has to behave like a 28 year old adult . which is not at all sensible and applicable .to pressurise the child.
let us treat children as children let them have all the freedom as children we have to teach them the ethics, confidence, human values, etc.,

as parents let us expect our children to become good citizens of this universe first

the rest all happens according to our genes the good imprints and the bad imprints in our soul.
yes genes play a vital role in one's life.

cheers
padma

dear padma,
here the morale is this groom the winning horse and let the others run along all have beauty of their own, lets have more sports person, they are also earning in millions nowadays, artist very good ones get their products auctioned abroad, so i can keep adding the positives, lets branch out, instead of having unemployed engineers, and post graduates..sunkan

Sunkan,
When I was reading this, one Tamil film song came to my mind sung by Chandrababu--- 'buddhi ulla manidhar yellam vetri kaanbadhillai, vetri pettra manidhar yellam....'

The first-impression of a person is being measured by his success in life or the status he is in. This is the reason for us 'seeking the winning horse'. Expectations are too high to be achieved, sometimes. This is also one of the reason for the stress in life.

I accept the last line of yours where 'one is not capable- give way for others'.

Each and everyone is special in their own way.

sriniketan

Originally Posted by Sriniketan

Sunkan,
When I was reading this, one Tamil film song came to my mind sung by Chandrababu--- 'buddhi ulla manidhar yellam vetri kaanbadhillai, vetri pettra manidhar yellam....'

The first-impression of a person is being measured by his success in life or the status he is in. This is the reason for us 'seeking the winning horse'. Expectations are too high to be achieved, sometimes. This is also one of the reason for the stress in life.

I accept the last line of yours where 'one is not capable- give way for others'.

Each and everyone is special in their own way.

sriniketan

i also get reminded of this song many time in many references, the incapabilities of the person reminds one not to push too much to drive them to depression is what i attempted here, the adult life we come terms about the result but not when we are young, we drive our ambitions on to them a lot.

when my daughter was young i used to feed her vendekkai saying nalla kanakku varum and later in life she would say i hate that vendekka because it landed me as a maths teacher, but i must say whatever the subject she is a good teacher though...priya and i used to have a lot of argument about this, one day i would ask her to apply for the post of english news reader, then another day may be she should attempt the IAS exams and aim for a collector's post, and another day it would be altogether different like a CA or ICWA, she would rant, saying you should had given birth to atleast a dozen to see all your ambitions, now leave me alone...sunkan