Praying At Who's Cost..

PRAYING AT THE COST OF OTHERS:

Morning started with a wail and a big fight, just peeped in to see that ragini was crying very badly she has given birth to a child just now a week ago and I was very upset just dropped in to find out what the problem was.

Among all those chaos I was scared may be the child is no more, only to see it sleeping happily on her grandma’s shoulder, then what was it, as I was driven with curiosity, I went near her parents and none would talk, and ragini was all too upset, but after some time all let loose like a can of worms.

Aunty! This grandmother in law of mine wants that I should tonsure to thirupathi because she has prayed that she would get me to do this if the childbirth was an uneventful one, now tell me look at my hair, I have taken care of it for so many years and now I am 26 and I have such a long hair till my knee and take care of it so much how do I go about her prayer, she says if I don’t follow then the child may face the wrath of god, now how can a god curse, and how can my people think of tonsuring my head, as their prayer..

It looked very ridiculous, the limit for a human right. how could some people pray something like this, that too such long wonderful hair that she is taking care of just like her child, some woman take so much of pain for satisfaction and suddenly a young wife, or daughter in law is put through this..

We have this funny attitude here in India putting through people to tonsure
Rolling on the ground[angapradakshanam], taking the kavadi, climbing the hill to thirupathi, and so on, I know of one gentleman who has refused to climb as he does not believe in these stuff…

I tried explaining to ragini’s in laws but to no Vail they believe their kuladeivam that is their family deity might harm, wish someone could put some sense into these people, the length of hair of a young woman, her vanity should not be pledged without her consent. What say u all…sunkan


its a fiction:

Gosh thats horrible! I really feel sorry for the DIL. Poor thing her joy of childbirth will be completely ruined!!!!!!!!!!! As it is one goes through soo much physically and mentally in those 9 months and now this! What a terrible situation to be in.
This is no consolation, and I don't know if this a possiblility as I am not very well aware of Hindu customs. But incase it is possible, and if the poor DIL decides she will go through it. Then would it be possible for her to donate her hair to a cancer foundation. There are foundations that use this hair to make wigs for cancer chemotherapy survivors. Perhaps if the DIL could do this then atleast she can think of it as also a charitable gesture made. A truly "giving" gesture on the occasion of the birth of her child.
Just a thought, not to negate the complete awfulness of the poor girls situation. And please tell her to take a stand and forbid in-laws for the future.
~ Naazneen

Originally Posted by naazneen

Gosh thats horrible! I really feel sorry for the DIL. Poor thing her joy of childbirth will be completely ruined!!!!!!!!!!! As it is one goes through soo much physically and mentally in those 9 months and now this! What a terrible situation to be in.
This is no consolation, and I don't know if this a possiblility as I am not very well aware of Hindu customs. But incase it is possible, and if the poor DIL decides she will go through it. Then would it be possible for her to donate her hair to a cancer foundation. There are foundations that use this hair to make wigs for cancer chemotherapy survivors. Perhaps if the DIL could do this then atleast she can think of it as also a charitable gesture made. A truly "giving" gesture on the occasion of the birth of her child.
Just a thought, not to negate the complete awfulness of the poor girls situation. And please tell her to take a stand and forbid in-laws for the future.
~ Naazneen

dear naaz,
all we neighbours are at it but the beleif will take over i think dont know..hope her parents arrive in time to help her..sunkan

Hi Sunkan,
That is unjust... You can't pledge someone else's hair to God! Reminds me of a scene from Parikshakku Neramachchu... in which Varadukkutty ( YG Mahendra)prays to God, If everything goes well...he will take the neighbour to Thirupathi and tonsure him!

Now for the rest of her life, the young woman will live in regret of losing her hair... or in guilt...anticipatiting ill luck for her and her child.... What a NO -Win situation!

Dear Sunkan,

We all do this... that includes me.... we pray for something and tell that if this happens I will do this and that.... Literally speaking it is a trade off with GOD... You do me this and I will do that for you.....

When we pray and ask for some thing ask with open heart.... HE is the Almighty.... He doesnt need you belongings.... HE who gives you everything.... why does he needs to take it back....

But the elders in the family, with their tradional backgrownd do not understand...Having said all these.... when you have prayed and it has happened and IF YOU BELIEVE IN GOD then better do it... Else, afterwards for any failure in life will make you to repend wheather it is because of this or what...

It is basically the Belief.... I still remember... When I was a kid we went to Samayapuram... while coming back the Bus was too full... One lady was with a child and there was a 3 soveriegn chain...One man pocketed it... The lady was literally crying and she pointed out a man and said i doubt this man only... They searched him throughly... nothing could be found... This lady was screaming..."O mariatha... Un kovilukku vandhen en chainu pochey"... The bus had a bump/jerk and this fellow vomited and came the chain.... It may be pure co-incidence.... But the whole people who till that moment that that this lady is just making a story, because she is a village lady... we dumbstruck... Then it became GOD has helped her....

At the end it is the belief which counts.....At the same note... Please dont pray that I will make the other person to do something... because the other person may not have the same belief....

Poor Ragini... Whatever decision she takes, should stand by it and not repend for it at later stage...

Veda

hi sunkan,

Ways of the mind. you are so instilled with your beliefs ..you forget you are hurting your own people....

there are lot of people who do this....why dont they think twice before praying...............

As twinsmom states..it is no win situation either way....

Originally Posted by twinsmom

Hi Sunkan,
That is unjust... You can't pledge someone else's hair to God! Reminds me of a scene from Parikshakku Neramachchu... in which Varadukkutty ( YG Mahendra)prays to God, If everything goes well...he will take the neighbour to Thirupathi and tonsure him!

Now for the rest of her life, the young woman will live in regret of losing her hair... or in guilt...anticipatiting ill luck for her and her child.... What a NO -Win situation!

AH VIJU,
I GOT THIS NEWS IN A MAGAZINE AND THE REST IS ALL FICTION HAHAH NOW MY TURN TO U..WHAT SAY U..YESTERDAY UR WOMAN IN HEAT MADE MY HEAD GO SPINNING...SUNKAN

Originally Posted by Vysan

Dear Sunkan,

We all do this... that includes me.... we pray for something and tell that if this happens I will do this and that.... Literally speaking it is a trade off with GOD... You do me this and I will do that for you.....

When we pray and ask for some thing ask with open heart.... HE is the Almighty.... He doesnt need you belongings.... HE who gives you everything.... why does he needs to take it back....

But the elders in the family, with their tradional backgrownd do not understand...Having said all these.... when you have prayed and it has happened and IF YOU BELIEVE IN GOD then better do it... Else, afterwards for any failure in life will make you to repend wheather it is because of this or what...

It is basically the Belief.... I still remember... When I was a kid we went to Samayapuram... while coming back the Bus was too full... One lady was with a child and there was a 3 soveriegn chain...One man pocketed it... The lady was literally crying and she pointed out a man and said i doubt this man only... They searched him throughly... nothing could be found... This lady was screaming..."O mariatha... Un kovilukku vandhen en chainu pochey"... The bus had a bump/jerk and this fellow vomited and came the chain.... It may be pure co-incidence.... But the whole people who till that moment that that this lady is just making a story, because she is a village lady... we dumbstruck... Then it became GOD has helped her....

At the end it is the belief which counts.....At the same note... Please dont pray that I will make the other person to do something... because the other person may not have the same belief....

Poor Ragini... Whatever decision she takes, should stand by it and not repend for it at later stage...

Veda

DEAR VEDA,
RAGINI IS FINE IN MY MIND DONT WORRY, JUST A SMALL PIECE OF APPEAL IN A MAGAZINE SENT MY GREY MATTER SPLIT THE WAY IT DID...IT IS FICTION ALL THE WAY, SORRY GUYS..SUNKAN

Originally Posted by shanvy

hi sunkan,

Ways of the mind. you are so instilled with your beliefs ..you forget you are hurting your own people....

there are lot of people who do this....why dont they think twice before praying...............

As twinsmom states..it is no win situation either way....

OH SHANTHI,
IT IS FICTION DEAR DONT FEEL BAD, I GOT THIS FROM VIJU, U C YESTERDAY SHE HAS POSTED ABOUT WOMAN IN HEAT IT IS A GAME SORT WHERE EACH ONE WRITES WHAT COMES TO MIND WITH THAT TITLE, WHICH I HAVE STARTED HERE TOO, LETS SEE HOW MANY JOIN...REGARDS SUNKAN

Hi all,


When it comes situations like Raagini's case though it is fictious ,It all depends on the things howmuch we are attached to.If grandmother had pledged that she will tonsure her head in stead of Raagini's everybody would have said Oh how kind of her and great etc,etc.Even now she believes that Raagini is like her own person and she did the pledge of Raagini's head tonsure.If Raagini also feels the sameway like grandmother that grandmother is her own person and thinks,acts for good only she might not have opposed it.And moreover she is not attached to her grand mother' love n affection instead to her hair beacuse it is long and beautiful.I guess the pupose of tonsure of head itself is loose what we look like and what we are to ALMIGHTY.If Raagini can understand this she will not hurt her grandmother and repent it later for the consequences.


Krish.