Moondru Kodugal

"Appa, aththai (my elder sister) wanted you to bring the harmonium along, when you come to USA", my son informed over phone couple of days back.
"Oh God! Not again", I cried within.

The last few months were exhausting both personally & professionally.
So I thought a break could help and decided to spend few weeks with my son in LA. As they say "Pillayar pidikka poi, kurangu ana kathai".

My elder sibling, Visalam, is currently visiting her daughters in San Jose.
Knowing her well, ever since I was born, a mini Hitlee (female Hitler) on issues where she had made up her mind, I know irrespective of carrying my personal things or not, Harmonium was a must, if I have any intentions of spending reminder of my life peacefully.
I could see the query written in bold letters, written on your faces, as to why such a simple request to bring a musical instrument along, should agitate me so.
Let me share the story.

My mind rushes back to that day, nearly 50 years back.
We were living in Triplicane. I was abt 8 yrs and Visalam abt 12 or so.
My parents suddenly woke up to the fact that it was high time Visalam was initiated into carnatic music, a pre-requirement for marriage in Tambram household.
It was customary that the girl sing one or two carnatic songs during 'ponnu parkal' for the boy's side's entertainment.
Playing some musical instrument like Veena instead, was also OK.
In addition the visitors were offered 'sojji & bajji'( S&B) for keeping themselves occupied. This menu was common for the occasion and became synonymous with 'ponnuparkal'.
More about PP later.

In order to make Visalam marriage worthy in the next 8 years or so, it was decided to admit her in 'Saraswathy Ghana Nilayam', a well known institute for music in T'cane - not very far from our house. Visalam, by nature, believed in expressing herself as strongly as she could and music was something alien to her psyche.
But, her arguments had no effect on our parents. I was assigned the responsibility of escorting her to the music class & back, daily in the morning hours. This institute was for girls only and I used to sit outside till Visalam's class ended, for escorting her back.
The constant exposure to the collective expression of so many would be brides, 'sing'ing in unison, helped me pickup some basics of Carnatic music, without any tuition fee.
But, unfortunately this did not last long as Visalam felt it was infra-dig for her to sit along with kids half her age, who invariably 'out shouted' her.
Thus, one fine morning, within couple of weeks of her joining the class, she refused to attend it any further.

There after, parents arranged for one lady tutor to come home in the evenings to teach her music. This music teacher soon realised that making Visalam graduate beyond 'Janda / sarali varisai' was one challenge which even the great Bagirath may not be comfortable to accept. But, as she badly needed the money coming from this tuition, she pulled on without any complaints.
This tuition ended all of a sudden, when mom by chance noticed that the teacher singing to herselves while Visalam was busy reading some Vikatan or so, behind closed doors. On questioning, the teacher was open to admit her inability to make Visalam sing and opted out.

It was about this time, our elder brother got married and the newly wed SIL came to stay with us for a couple of weeks, till such time my brother made arrangements for a house in Bangalore. As SIL turned out to be a decent singer, mom thought of making her teach a couple of songs to V - mainly for PP occasion.
It was a tricky, making the high profile 'naththanaar' take music lesson from the new SIL.
Mom diplomatically sorted things out by suggesting that SIL could teach both myself & Visalam a couple of songs, primarily to keep herself occupied.
I was like 'oppukku chappani, orukku mangottai' in the entire arrangement, if you get what I mean.
Eventhough, SIL was initially taken in by mom's suggestion, soon realised the enormity of the situation that she had landed herself in.
However, in 10 days or so, my brother turned up for taking SIL to Bangalore.
It transpired much later that SIL had put enormous pressure on him to rescue her soonest.
But before leaving, SIL informed mom that V had improved a lot and if only she could regularly practice the songs with me, she would come out with flying colours in any PP session. This was the real starting point for my sufferings.

V practiced with me for a couple of days on mom's instructions. Right from the beginning it was a 'no go' situation.
Soon my parents realised that it could be an easier option to look out for a groom with no great interest in music rather than making V sing to please a musically trained ear.
This put an end to our joint sessions, to the relief of all concerned.
As luck could have it, they were also successful in landing the right groom, who got more carried away by Visalam's looks.
With that I was relieved , albeit prematurely, that the storm had blown over.

Visalam got married and moved to UP where BIL was employed.
Soon Visalam became mother of 2 daughters.
It looked a coincidence when I was also posted to the same city where Visalam was living. Her daughters were 10 & 12 yrs then.
One fine morning, Visalam decided that it was time that her daughters developed some interest in our culture.
As a mother she felt that her daughters must learn Carnatic music and instructed me to start regular music lessons for both the kids forthwith.
This turned out to be greater challenge given the kids' Tamil pronounciation. It was a night mare of sorts.
The kids were toppers in studies and sports but when it came to Tamil Carnatic music songs ....... ?????
It even made me think that Visalam was any day much better - at least you need not worry about the pronunciation & grammar part.
God had taught me 'Iru kodugal' lesson effectively.
This ordeal lasted for almost an year, till I got myself transferred out of that city.

Years rolled on.
When Visalam came on a visit to my place after many years, she saw my daughter learning music from a renowned Vidwan. (She turned out to be good singer. )
For struthi purposes, my daughter used a Harmonium that we had at home.
The overall effect impressed Visalam, perhaps.
This was nearly 15 years back.


Now, both Visalam's daughter are married and well settled in USA. Every year Visalam goes for spending a few months with them.
My first niece has one daughter and the second two.
The news of my impending visit, has perhaps kindled Visalam's love for music once again.
She is particular that this time I teach the kids with Harmonium also.
My vacation gone bust - even before it started.:drowning
Come to think of it, atleast my nieces, even though were brought up in UP, did understand Tamil somewhat. Their kids, having been born & brought up in USA .... ????
Oh, God! Are you going to teach me "Moondravadhu Kodu' philosophy now?
Cheers,
Rrg

 

Dear Sri,
Thanks for your comments.
Yes, I do know abt portable Sruti Box.
But, having seen my daughter practicing with Harmonium ages back, Visalam has now decided it would only be a H.
In our household, their is no court of appeal against V's rulings.
I have no other go but to present myself something like - 'Enga oru pattukkaran' by mid July '10.
To be at the receiving end from 3 generations of strong willed ladies ..... ! I do not wish it even on my enemies.
I pray that these grand nieces do beget only boys till I am alive. To think of teaching carnatic / Tamil music to a second generation US immigrants......! Oh, God! Please save me.:rotfl
Cheers!
Rrg