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One Bride for Two GroomsThe Wedding Season is here in full swing in Jaipur.5th Feb happened to be one day, where all the roads were choc a block , and I had invitations for 7 weddings, but chose two to attend.I don’t have sons, whom I could depute to attend, so decided on two, giving the others a skip.
These two were of the lower rung. The first one I attended was around 26 kms away, of the son of an ex Tailor of mine, the grounds next to his house was the venue.He had two kids from his first wife, who died, and then he remarried, and had two kids from the second one.
This wedding was of the son of the second wife, and all the villagers were around.Well I just went, didn’t eat anything, searching for the fellow to give the envelope. In fact I had run out of envelopes, and just near his house, purchased half a dozen. It had a 1 ruppee coin, and it was for 3/-, and I asked the fellow to show me better ones, the paper was of cheap quality, but the shopkeeper said, sir, here no one will buy expensive ones, sorry this is what we have.
Well I asked him for a pen, put in 250/- and wrote my name on it, and he said , Sir so much u put, people here in this village don’t give more than 11/- or max I have seen 21/- well what do I tell him , what relation I have with the fellow.So give 21/- and the whole family of 10 go and have a feast eh ! Not a bad deal, and I saw the plates full with food spilling out, for they have given the envelope , and must have good value for it.A Wife of my friend is crazy about attending marriages, and in her kitchen calendar I saw X drawn on certain days, I asked her what is this, she said, these days the kitchen is closed, as we have marriages to attend.Some people just love it, I just hate going to marriages, its something I have to do, period, like going to the loo, u just cant help it, but get it done with.
When I was giving the envelope I noticed a fellow sitting with the book open, and everyone was queuing in front of him so I too stood in line.The fellow was smart, opening each envelope, counting the money, asking the name, writing it down, and then again putting the money back in the envelope. This way there is no chance of an empty envelope coming in .Normally most weddings have empty ones about half a dozen or so, even in my daughter’s wedding we had one empty one, no name outside.God knows who gave it.
Well if humans can marry, so can dogs .Bingo’s trainer too turned up on the 5thasking if we are ready to made Tuffy and /or Bingo, there is a black Labrador female, she is in heat, I said u choose the Groom, for me it is ok, but I informed him that Tuffy is a confirmed Gay, he said if not Tuffy, then Bingo will do, I said take yr pick. I told him, will there be an orgy in my lawns,for there is one bride, and two grooms, and they will fight over the female, he said we will let one fellow inside each, and whoever succeeds, the bride and the honeymoon is his.Well Well
Well the first to go in the lawns of my house was Tuffy, and he just ran away from the lady, she was trying hard to come to him, but our Gay friend well just barked at her, so he was disqualified from the Swyamwar and Bingo was let in.Bingo seemed very interested, and he was sniffing her, but tuffy was watching all this, and was barking furiously, which made poor Bingo cringe, and we could see his tail between his legs, the poor lady wondering what is wrong with her, that none of the grooms like her.She must have felt like committing suicide.
Maybe, Tuffy was angry, how dare Bingo go near a female, why, am I not enough for him, we both will be happy and gay all our lives.I guess Tuffy must have this song running in his mind from that Rishi Kapoor movie “Hum Do premi, Kutiya Chod Chale, Jeevan ki Saari Kuttiya Chod Chale”.
Brother and bhabhi were desperately wanting to become granddads, but their dreams were shattered and Bhabhi was so sad. I can understand, that she must be feeling like KJ’s mom,.whose son refuses to get married.But that is life.
Sometimes I wish there were more Gays around, so less marriages, so less envelopes, so less loss of money, and less of barats and Traffic nuisance. Agree Friends ?
Husband was crying in front of the TV.
Wife – Why are u crying, which serial are u watching
Husband – I am watching our marriage CD !
Sardar Was traveling in train, a lady sat on his son’s berth and did not get up.Sardar starting shouting “ This lady is not giving Birth to my Son “ !!!