Son what are your future plans for me?

Son what are your future plans for me?

Yes this line was coming to my mind every time I was forced to see the ad by I think ICICI bank ;where a small cute son is asking his father - papa what are your future plans for my carrier?
Than the salesman from bank came to advise every parent to come to his Bank for future plans of their child.
I was telling my hubby one should ask him what are his future plans for parents when he would be educated & employed , would he invest for the future of his parents.
To day when I read about Suresh in kamalji post “ the news paper vendor “
I was compel to sit & write my feelings.
All parents by nature are given the genes to protect , raise & educate their offspring’s to maximum of their resources , but nature has not given the same type of genes in children for parents care in their old age.

Some do that out of love & affections, others do under social pressure that what the society would say :but most of them now a days just left parents on their own after taking maximum material benefits from them .
So I want to prepare an ad ; Father asking Son - son what are your future plans for our old age? By that they would be much better secured & knew their son’s future plans for them before hand good or bad ,No?
What do you all say?

jaishree,

though it's a common feeling amongst us including me that children would take care of us in our old age, this is slowly changing as you mentioned.

we can teach them good things but don't expect them to follow that.

we as parents are responsible for their upbringing & welfare.

if they show us the love & affection, it's a bonus. bonuses are never guaranteed.

these are the responsibilities for us:

1. take care of your parents

2. take care of the Present YOU & SPOUSE

3. take care of the kids & their future till they become independent

3. take care of the Future YOU & SPOUSE

we should condition our mind not to expect anything from them.

Dear Jaishree

Like Natpudan said, there is no guarantee these days that our kids will look after us later in life. Also I think we are expecting too much in return and possibly have a selfish motive that we are doing all this for our kids, so that they will look after us later down the line. Parents love their children and do everything possible for them to grow and become independant. If the children carry the same feelings and if they realise the amount of hardwork their parents have gone through to bring them up to such a stage, they will look after their parents when in need. That should be something which will come automatically. Well and good to have some money saved for parents but just money does and mean nothing really. As parents, we need to learn to be independant as well.

I used to like ICICI ads, all set up in a kind of real family background. But this ad has made me frown. All of us know no reminder is required to parents to take care of their LO’s future and life. Once we become parents most of us are automatically keyed to live solely for the benefit of a better life for our dear children. May be you can give your idea for some pension plan ;) Where the parents ask their son/daughter “ Dear, have you planned for our retired life?” then a salesman advertising for some pension plans, because as you have well said it is the children who need a reminder or reality check to take care of their parents more than the parents themselves.

Jaishree,
Such a thoughtprovoking Idea you shared. Though I didn't see this ad on TV, but I can imagine. It is social responsibility of both children and parents to protech eachother in their tender and old ages.

Dear Jaishree,

Even i could not have said it better.

Yes what a lovely blog, and the line to the kids, what have u thought about us and our old age.

today i borrow and give u money for yr highter education, i may beleft with nothing for my old age, so if i give u this money, will u take care of me then?

and takeit in writing from the child, and it should be valid in the court of lawy, other wise the son is bound to return that amount, along with interest at 12% compunded to the parents.

and why shoudl the parents be guarantor for the funds.The banks must not insist, and they should have the means to recover the money from the future employers, just as they recover money from u when u have take a loan, why involve the poor parents ?

Well said jaishree, well said.

Regards

kamal

Jai,
I missed you alot. Nice to see you again.
A very thought provoking post.
In our Indian society,the poor and the middle class parents take loans beyond their means to educate children. Our age old tradition teach es us to take care of them . But now with the influence of west they neglect the parents.
While in West, the children mostly finance their education themselves using scholarships etc. So parents are left with some savings. The society caters for old folks with good homes etc.
Here the parents deplete the savings for the children. Jai ! as you said we must have some financial plans for parents too which children can offer to parents.
I have no comment abt children who leave their parents in lurch.
Jaya

Dear Jai,
This Ad irks me more because the child they have chosen for this Ad seems to be too young to worry about his future.
The same ICICI Prudential have retirement plans also and we have to chose one if we do not want to be dependent on our children. Present younger generation will not be dependent on their children like the past generation.
PS

Dear jai,

good to see u here why are u not here more often?

yes, it is a good idea and question too..maybe it will at least act on the guilty conscience of those people who totally ignore their parents.

but all said and done i think kids simply learn from the parents...so, if I want to be a part of my childs family in future,then let him now see that my parents and inlaws are a part of my family now...thats the first step ..of course ,even then it is no guarantee that I am going to be taken care off but at least our conscious is clear,thats all..

Dear jai,
A thought provoking post.i also used to get irritated when that Ad is telecasted. I somehow feel that child is selfish to ask such a question. It is right or wrong I do not know. You are correct by showing this they concentrate only on one side . how about the other side of the coin where they have to take care of the parents?
Not all elderly people need or want constant, live-in care in their children's homes. They may prefer to live in a community with other people their age, or they may be quite capable of complete independence. Regardless of the circumstances, we still have obligations to our parents. If they are in need of financial assistance, we should help them. If they are sick, we should take care of them. If they need a place to stay, we should offer our home. If they need help with household and/or yard work, we should step up to assist. And if they are under the care of a nursing facility, we need to assess the living conditions to make sure they are being properly and lovingly cared for.But in HDFC, ad, they show the daughter caring and planning to buy a new car for her father. So cute that is!!!
with love
pad