Paper chase

My performance appraisal was done recently by my boss & as he was setting target for the forthcoming year he said ” Jaya ! we need to go on to a paperless office. Can you work on that?” I know with current technology we can reduce the paper usage but to be devoid?
We were supposed to be hurtling towards a paperless society. But evidence tells me otherwise. Almost everyday when I go to the front gate to check my mail box, I am confronted with a wad flyers advertising all manners of products or services. I usually flick thro’ them before relegating to the recycle bin, just to make sure a fat cheque from a Samaritan isn’t stuck between the adverts or any free give away gift offer .
I never responded to any of these adverts , but can’t imagine anyone sitting with the coffee and spending even 10 minutes reading everything in details- all those promises of ant free garden, wrinkle free skin and fat free waistlines. I once saw an advert saying “Do you want money”? “yes of course who don’t? I imagined some Samaritan giving away money for people like me. Later I came to know it is from licensed money lender ,whose interest rate will make me indebted to him thro’ out my life.
Lately since the onset of rain, those flyers have become a bit nuisance. You see- sometimes the person is in a hurry to finish his rounds, he doesn’t insert the flyers well into the mailbox. When it rains the flyers act as conductors of rain water into my mailbox, allowing the water to seep into the bona fide mail - fat cheque, invitation to high class parties, passionate love letter from Bill Gates or Warren Buffet – but actually, its almost bills and statements. But I am eternally hope full . Besides if a tree must die, it should be for a happy cause. A tree must not end its life demanding exorbitant amounts of money for electricity consumed, or telling me about my spending style thro my credit card statements.
Still things may be different in future, 20 years from now, my mail box may look entirely .No bills (at least no bills on the paper) or flyers or passionate love letter from a millionaire (now that I am eligible) . I can almost hear my DS saying “Mommy! millionaires don’t write love letters , they may send a chartered plane to take you for a date, anyway at your age he may take you for a nanny for his kid”.
I will miss the hand written address on envelopes or ripping open the envelope like a women in passion. On the other hand my late DH used to wait for the letter opener be given to him by his butler Jaya. Well he had the luxury of a butler in hand.
20 years from now other Paper products may disappear. Of course now we have news paper on line, books can be downloaded, but the toiler paper may be-----I don’t want to imagine it what will replace it. We are used to toilet paper to absorb the moisture, maybe hot air blower may work in lieu but I am afraid of the danger of careless use and the accidents it will cause.
Still no one can take the books away from me or my memory of post it note. I think it was in early 80s when it was put to use in dramatic manner. I was new at work, two of my colleagues were having disagreements. To vent his spleen, one of them wrote a message to the other on the post it and stuck it on the recipient’s desk when she was away at the coffee machine.
When she came back, she looked at the note, looked at the offending co worker and began methodically ripping the notes into tiny pieces , underscoring each tare with a grunt. & loud hummmmm. We looked up to see what would caused the enraging, as to require a public destruction. The rhythmic nature of the tearing caused a wide spread suspicion that post It contained insulting words that caused the recipient to send a strong non verbal response. Now try with e-mail- it will be BOLD AND CAPITAL letters, Or I can imagine some one typing on the keyboard with strong finger pressure like Sivaji Ganesan playing piano in 80s Tamil movies with strong facial muscle movements. I often found my key boards of my desk top at my home didn’t function well, till noticed my late DH typing like he is on manual yester years typewriter. I looked at him with open mouth and said “these are touch keys, no need pressure”. The male ego said”I know” and continued in the same manner to my chagrin.
Back to my story of “war of post its”. Later we came to know that man was apologetic while the lady was not in mood to accept, well it was called the war of post its. This drama kept us entertained for a week, with Mani retnam and Subhash Ghai’s talents coming into us.
My thoughts on paperless life? Not while I am round.

 

Sir,
:bowdown:bowdown

I really treasure this fb, calling me Collussus of Rhodes. Remember it was struck by lightening, i prefer to be called Statue of Liberty. Collussus was in natural state, my current natural state is not worth looking,S.L is adorned by a garb ,this will suit me better hiding my infirmities

I want to hug you and kiss you because you mentioned my hero S.Leacock. I remember reading about him in school and then i got hooked on to him. Englishle naan konjum (romba) weak.So Wodehouse is beyond my abilities. There are few more in IL who writes with humor. I really was looking for someone who will mention S.Leacock. Must hug you for that.

If you can laugh at yourself, humor comes automatically.My DS too writes well with humor, but he refuses to write. I too had written few emotional pieces, but i prefer not to dwell in it. It was written at that time:spontaneous overflow of powerfull emotions at that instant.

Entha oru fb 100 fbke samam.
Jaya
p.s : I had written on charles and Boyles law,(in my pvt collection) but you beat me with your Archimedes & Einstein.