Learning to LIVE better while learning to DRIVE better!

[JUSTIFY]
To me, driving a car was once a wish, later a necessity, much later an attempt, a failure, a choice, a consistent effort and finally an achievement and a sense of satisfaction.

I sat behind the wheel for the first time after 30 years. I had never even ridden a bicycle before. Never on road in the driver’s seat!

By the way, from ‘fearful driving’ to ‘felicitous driving’, I observed some similarities between ‘driving’ and ‘living’. I noticed that certain things I learnt during my driving apply even to life as a whole.

Call it tips, rules or principles which led to this sense of achievement in driving, they did play a significant role in my approach to life as well. So, here we go:

1. Believe in yourself in order to achieve!

2. Don’t fear ‘fear’. Fear is inevitable for all new things in life. Don’t give too much importance to ‘fear’ eventually it loses its hold on you. I kept on telling to myself that fear fades away gradually when you don’t feed it.

I said ‘gradually’. The only way of getting out of fear is to:

- do it,
- keep doing it &
- Do it afraid

Overcoming fear was a gradual process to me. Meanwhile, I continued to do it and do it afraid.

Now, ‘fear’ is something of the past. I am truly enjoying my drive now.

3. Procrastination:

From tomorrow, from next week, from next month, after I complete paying my EMIs … these were the excuses I continued to make, to take my car out for the first time into the city traffic. I am now here celebrating achievement because ‘one day’ I stopped postponing.

Which day is going to be that ‘one day’ is your choice and the first step towards achievement! :thumbsup

4. Failure is not final.

When I purchased the car, I attempted to put the car inside the gate. While climbing the inclination in front of the gate, I rammed into the wall of the gate. That dented my car and my confidence too. I saw my new car in that position and lost hope that I’ll drive my car. Had I succumbed to my strong urge to QUIT, I wouldn’t have been here today.

Even yesterday, I collided with an auto which damaged my car a little. I should have stopped my vehicle a little earlier which could have avoided the collision. I was wrong but the auto driver was also not right! Because of this one failure I need not doubt my achievement.

I am learning that mistakes don’t have to keep me from my destiny permanently and failure doesn’t have to affect me so negatively that it stops me permanently.

Failure happens. But it is not final unless you choose it to be!

5. Patience is a must for driving.

6. Feeling lazy to drive the car once in a while is fine. Had laziness been my habit, I would have never been this better at driving today.

7. Seek divine help every day. We never know what a day holds for us. We start the day’s drive with faith in ourselves and faith in GOD with all new hopes.

Each day, I start my car not knowing what’s ahead of me, placing myself in the hands of omnipotent GOD.

Pedestrians suddenly crossing the roads, buffaloes or dogs darting across the roads from nowhere, cyclists who doesn’t really care about my signaling, drunken lorry drivers, people who find it funny standing right in front of the vehicle fast approaching at a speed of 60 kmph just to scare the ‘lady driver’, persons who think it’s their birth right to take right turn or left turn anytime and from any angle & point …. etc., are all unexpected challenges of a given day’s drive. Whilst taking as much care as I can, I seek the help of God for unexpected challenges.

This answers my fear of “what if I …..??”, “what if it …??” etc.,

8. Don’t brood when dogs bark.

One day when I was starting off from a traffic signal, a guy from behind screamed like this which was audible to everyone …

“Hey lady (&$#@& - some dirty language), move fast ….. Don’t know why these lady bitches come out with cars and doesn’t know how to drive.”

I was so offended by the language used and kept on blaming myself the whole day for not doing anything about this incident. I regretted that I should have stopped my car immediately and caught hold of his collar and slapped him or I should have took the assistance of the traffic police or I should have called the police officer who is one of our relatives .. The whole day was ruined thinking I should have done this … I should have done that …. :rant

Dogs bark. So will some people! Leave it there itself and move on. Don’t measure your performance and strength based on people’s opinion. tsk

Home remedy: Go to wash basin and spit. You will be relieved of the hatred and anger to some extent. I did it. It worked!

9. I don’t let other person’s mistakes bother me so much. There are other drivers who are highly unpredictable on road. Getting angry and cursing them each time I come across such drivers drains my energy. I learnt to be defensive, alert and to concentrate on my job rather than others job.

10. Too much understanding, love and care from family is also not good for a person’s growth and achievement sometimes. Every time my dad asks me to take my car out since it has been one whole year since purchase, my mom used to interfere saying “let her take her time. She hasn’t ridden a bicycle even. She will definitely have fear. If not this year she will take it next year. Car is hers. She will learn it anytime she wants etc., I took shelter under this care of my mom for so much time (more than appropriate).

As long as there is someone to validate your ‘inertia’ you will not achieve things.

11. You have your own style. You are unique. Don’t copy, don’t compare. Do it in your own way and be comfortable with it.

I learnt that I don’t have to feel inferior to others who do it skillfully than me. I am ME and I am OK! :coffee

12. No one has time to think of you and your style of driving. They are busy with their own. Don’t think too much about what others think of you.

13. I’ll give a way to others. Not to the extent of me hitting the road divider. Balancing ‘live’ and ‘let live’. Me first, others next. :biggrin2:

During the initial days of my driving, I used to go way too much to give space to others. I was once about to hit the road divider. Utter stupidity!

14. I will not be unpredictable. My behavior on road will be calm, cool, composed and consistent. This leaves a hint to the other driver on road which keeps me away from accidents.

15. I’ll make my way to my destination. I found out that expecting and waiting for others to give a way is a futile exercise. Making out my way and making my way through the crowds, packed vehicles, discourteous drivers etc., is MY job.

16. Driving is an experience very much like life with varied unique experiences for each of us. It’s acquiring the skill on the job. I learn from my mistakes. I ensure I don’t repeat my shortfalls. An experience which teaches me what to do and what not to do, under given circumstances, to have a better and peaceful drive.

17. Change / deviation from routine happens:

I travel in the same route daily. By now, I am well acquainted with the road, I know when to take right, when to take left, when to slow down, what directions to look for vehicles that passes my way, the traffic signal points, the up hills, down hills and the road bumps. One day suddenly, due to some festival, the city police were diverting the vehicles to some other route which is usually very crowded, packed with all kinds of vehicles, unfinished roads, colleges and students crossing the roads abruptly. All this coupled with my lack of knowledge of the route.

I am generally reluctant to change. But, change happens. Not all times we are exposed to same set of routine. That doesn’t mean I have to cross my fingers and sit. I was so much tempted to pull my car aside and call my dad to come and pick me up. :spin:drowningI was a little irritated with the change without notice. :rant But later, I took a deep breath and made up my mind to boldly start venturing.

Change actually helps us to know something different, something more, something new. It takes us to new levels of confidence, understanding and skill.

18. Staying focused.

One day while we were travelling along with the family in our car, my sister’s daughter was continuously hitting the dashboard with her chapels where we have kept some religious books. My husband, who was driving the vehicle, was troubled by the scene and tried to push her legs aside so that her legs will not touch the book. Suddenly, with a lot of sound we ended up on the road divider with a wheel puncture. But by God’s grace nothing happened to us or our vehicle apart from damage to the wheel and the wheel cap as there was no vehicle following us.

That’s what a slight distraction from the focus does, sometimes even more, in driving and in life too.

19. There is nothing called perfection. It’s always an attempt, effort and successful betterment! :thumbsup

These pointers helped me for my betterment in driving and at the same time helped me to improve my approach to life as well. Somehow, learning many things to LIVE BETTER when learning to DRIVE BETTER!! This much so far and may be more to learn in the days to come.

PS:

1. I agree that I learnt all these very very late. But better late than never ... you see!

2. Spare me for any grammatical errors.

[/JUSTIFY]

 

Thank You Smriti.

Since when 'two years old = New???' Is this something NEW???

:biglaugh

All the best to you dear!!

 

Thank You Omsrisai. Take out you car soon. You'll love it. :thumbsup

 

Thanks DG for your FB.

Even I thought to take out my car only after my fear subsides.

Don't let fear stop you. Rather, let it accompany you if it is so much strong.

Meanwhile you keep driving afraid .... Gradually you'll get over the fear.

All the best!

 

Thank You so much racr for your FB.

Glad to know that it is informative and helpful to you.

Wishing you all the best!