Crtl + Z

[JUSTIFY]
I was about to board a bus. Lean girl stepped out. She was my friend & we both worked together few years back. Im one person she doesn’t want to see in her lifetime & she is one person whom I can never forget. Her stare violated me. Sometimes our eyes convey the message when our heart doesn’t want to.

We both worked together in the same dept.We had hell lot of fun being together. Instantly we burst into laughter. She fell in love with one of our colleague. It was really amazing to watch a girl falling in love. Wearing his favorite color dress, trickly seeing when he doesn’t see, giggling in silence, limited shyness, humming love songs, reading & touching his name in the notice board. I never felt love other than films. I keep watching her in amusement & with smiles. Her love strengthened when he reciprocated. I was never able to visualize the world which she was into. She was so joyful. Both of them were cheerful & energetic. Love had given them some strength.

I thought their love will succeed but fate had it otherwise. Both their parents objected. Days went by in pacifying them. Both became restless, agony & anguish filled them. Her lips forgot to smile & laugh & it wouldn’t even greet. I would watch her puffed eyes. I thought it was because of constant crying. Cheerfulness died a slow death. Both their parents dint bend down for their wish. They were so stubborn. Was it because they felt they had the right to take decision or they couldn’t digest when their children took decisions first or because society doesn’t allow it to? Or was it because they are judged by their children actions? What is pressurizing them so much? When they turn blind to their children cries & pain. I never knew love can be so painful. Yes it’s true when one cannot forget the memories, not able to erase it its too painful. Even if we lose a pendant or anything we loved our heart doesn’t rest until we find it but losing a person whom she dreamt that she would live for the rest of the life & wanted to walk away from it is so painful.

They both called off their relationship for the sake of their parents. I was very upset that day. Its was like watching a sapling nurture but when suddenly a rain destroys it. How bad we will feel. It was like that. Love that grew before me, ended before me. I was in a way proud they dint end neither their life nor married without their parents consent. When she gave up its was time for her parents to seek another proposal for marriage. One misery ended in another misery. I stayed helpless. Her torment continued & she gave way for engagement pleasing her parents.

Her lover called me up to meet. He gave the lovely things they shared when in love. Small greeting cards, key chains, letters, gift everything he cherished. It takes a very special heart to return the things so as to ensure she married in peace. I was worried why her parents blindly rejected him when he had such a good thought or to be precise such a good heart. He said he resigned from our office & is leaving that day. I could feel how painful it was. I handed over her gifts to her. I can never forget the cries she cried for one last time seeing that. Our heart is as small as our fist but what is causing it to pain so much? Maybe when you lost something willfully it pains even more. That was one day exactly before her marriage. She suddenly took a box put all her things of his & her in it sealed it & gave to me. She said I should retain it & told one last thing which I can never forget. She hugged me when I tried to wipe her tears & said I wish I never wanted to see you again. I was too shocked to hear that. She continued she had found memory when she sees me & it relates to her love. That was a very hard promise to make & totally unfair for her to conclude my friendship in that way. But friendship is not about being friends it’s about understanding each other too. I have come across many failures; few betrayals but I considered this as holy. A price to be paid for being a mute witness & for being helpless. I thought she was emotionally shattered & it would take sometime for her to recover from it. To say it in a filmy way a girl understands another girl’s heart better. I personally knew what was she going through & I wanted her madness to win by allowing her to avoid me so as to avoid her past life, memories that surrounded her. I was at least happy she was frank rather than avoiding me. I took the box in my hand & moved. she hugged me again. I wished luck & goodness & stepped out. I haven’t seen her then neither did I make any attempt nor she. I don’t know if she made any attempts & whether I changed my no or address.

When life isn’t fair to us I wish we had Crtl+z to whatever we wanted. May be my friend would have lived more happily than now if she had Crtl+z .I don’t know why god hasn’t enabled this function in us. It is because life is once & time & tide wait for none? Or he thought we would eventually forget him if we had the power to correct or get back what we wished? Certain times we wish to get back, certain things we want to forget & move on but couldn’t. God doesn’t create any shortcut keys may be he did it intentionally to count every action of ours & wanna see how we are dealing with it…
[/JUSTIFY]

 

Dear Kamalji,

"You don't know how strong you are, until being strong is the only option you have".As the quote says I was left with only one option.Thats why I say I wanted her madness to win by avoiding me.Yes Im a human even I have felt same as you at times feelin sad,angry but I just wanted to know whether she is fine now but her silence is posing too many questions....if she knows to takecare then im fine with it.Thanks for your feedback.


Kelly,Raba,Inc I will get back sorry as of now im runnning to grab the festive mood.

 

[JUSTIFY]
Thanks for your reply.To be honest I dont know Kelly whether Im a wonderful person I just followed a path where there was some light.But I did that willingly.I did understand her pain.I was left with no time to reconcile her...so I wanted to agree to her terms.
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