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Ask daughters to do household work? What age? What kind of works?

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by mithu202, Jan 19, 2015.

  1. mithu202

    mithu202 Silver IL'ite

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    Wil you ask your daughter to do household work??
    From what age do you ask them to do house hold work??
    What type of work you expect them to do??

    Note: I have not done any household work till marriage, today I had argument with my friend that only girls who do work from childhood can handle work after their marriage, But my point of view was no.

    Please pour in your suggestions ...
     
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  2. mithu202

    mithu202 Silver IL'ite

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    So many views but no response :(
     
  3. CrayoNess

    CrayoNess Platinum IL'ite

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    I do not differentiate in this area between my sons and daughter. Yes, I have asked them and taught them how to do housework. I think I should have done more but guess sometimes been lazy in this area. When they started school (beofre that they did some help but not really much) they were expected to clean their rooms weekly, empty the dishwasher when I asked, take their own dishes to the dishwasher, take out the garbage. In their teens I learned them how to use the washer and also do some simple dishes. My son (who is much taller than me) also helps me with some "mens work" :p like change the bulbs, carrying furniture etc.
     
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  4. mithu202

    mithu202 Silver IL'ite

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    Thanks @CrayoNess for your reply.

    Is it something only If we teach them now , they will do that in future. Helping on their own is ok I feel, But my friend makes her daughter to cook ( rasm, dosa, tea, chappathi), she is in sixth std, and again she was scolding her for not cleaning toilets, which I feel too much at this age.
     
  5. Sivasakthigopi

    Sivasakthigopi Gold IL'ite

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    Hi,
    It is good to make work from their 3 years old at present generation.
    Based on age provide works for your Kid! Like brushing, cleaning, helping...

    If your daughter is more than 10 Years, it is better to teach her cooking with your complete assistance!
    Teach her to wash her own clothes!
    Sweeping house, cleaning her room or her study table.
    Ask her to cut vegetables..
    Ask her to decorate dining table..
    Ask her to calculate Family budgets!
    Ask her to file insurance, Eb bill, telephone bill and important bills!
    Ask her to check previous grocery bill and compare with present one!
    Like and etc.,

    In our Mom's generation, they get married in early age. They lived with their mother in law. In their generation, most mil's provide works, guide them and made them shine.

    In our generation, most of us not did any works before marriage, after marriage we have our mother in law or any one like mother for our help and assistance.

    But this generation separated from family and live in any cities or abroad. So if we make our daughters work and ask her to sit near with us when we make budgets or discuss about expenses, she will completely take care of her family after married!

    We also many many mistakes in our family life, then we correct it. But if we teach her now on wards means, she dint do such mistakes in her future...
     
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  6. mithu202

    mithu202 Silver IL'ite

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    Yes @Sivasakthigopi, I accept your point but I was brought up such that I don't even wash my plate after meals, everything my mom does, But as soon as I got married The first day I started doing household chores,

    Now I don't have anyone with me to help (MIL or FIL), Only my DH, my daughter and myself.
    I am working + doing household chores. I don't even keep a maid.It's all come out of interest.

    What's the point in forcing kids to do work.Anyway we have to do all this after marriage why don't they enjoy the stay with their mom.
     
  7. Harini73

    Harini73 Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi,

    I think it will better if we teach them to work in their early years itself.But we should teach both the boys and girls,there should not be any difference between daughter and son.

    I ask my daughter(6 years) to take plates and glasses for dinner.Except her to empty her lunch box and some times she helps me in cutting vegetables and filling water in bottles etc.
     
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  8. mithu202

    mithu202 Silver IL'ite

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    Yes all the work you have mentioned is easy which they can do, but cooking and cleaning toilet is too much for a girl at sixth std.
     
  9. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    @mithu202

    Do you do your chores with happiness or just because it is expected of you.

    i believe when you introduce chores to kids, it is about teaching them to handle a little more responsiblity and take a lead when necessary.

    The other day i was sick, and i had loads of dishes to wash (I don't have a maid), and my son, when he saw it, started cleaning a few of them. i did not ask him. this voluntary helping and understanding the situations, the needs of the family comes with being involved. they need to be involved according to their age.

    your friend must have been through that rigid training as a kid, that she fears that if that is not practiced her child may not be able to face these chores later.
    so the dynamics are different in each family. that said, i am against forcing or scolding or shouting to get a chores done. i had to learn cooking as young as 8/10 and could do every chore around the house by 10, and the dynamics of my foo was such, while fom, many feel that if my kid does the work that it is child labor. yes, when i tell my kids that being independent and self sufficient comes with practice and helps in a lot of things and they have been helping as young as 7 and 4.

    I am not against doing chores around the house as is age appropriate. keeping your toilets clean is nothing wrong. if the child has a individual room for herself and if she is asked to keep her room and toilet clean at 6th standard she is around 11-12 yrs. and i believe a little bit of motivating and involving in keeping the room clean is good.

    whether it is a boy or a girl they should be involved in chores and should understand and work with the team called family.

    long back we did have a similar discussion http://www.indusladies.com/forums/schoolgoers-and-teens/40112-chores-and-children.html
     
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  10. Chitravivek

    Chitravivek Platinum IL'ite

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    OP: It all depends on you as such. If you don't want your DD to do any chores let it be. But my view point will be different here. I was always interested in household chores as a kid. I learnt cooking very young. Now my DD who is 4 yrs wants to help me in kitchen, clean the floor if the dirty, clean table, arrange plates during dinner. I am excited she shows interest on her own so YES I will let her do all these. May be when she grows older she may not be interested so I will not force either. I have a son and yes I will do the same thing to my son too. From where I was born and brought all men in our family know cooking and help their wives so I want my son to be like that too. So I will be teaching them all these and it ultimately boils down to their interest too.
     
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