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Sleeping issue with a 9 year old (Almost 10)

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by Anamika99, Jul 17, 2014.

  1. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    Hi All,

    My son will be 10 in 4 months.
    This has been his issues since he was born.

    It takes him forever to fall asleep.
    Based on on some suggestions we had

    1. we let him sleep late so if he has need of less number of hrs of sleep, it works out but till date we figured he needs 11 hrs
    2. Send him to be earlier say like 7 - in case his bed time is early - but that did not work
    3. Added a be time routine, reads, spends time with me , hugs goodnight too all in the home
    4. did meditation everyday up to 10 mins...for 2 months applied this. It used to make him sleepy but as soon as we are done, he is wide awake or still does not fall asleep....
    5. with summer, gets lots of play time and plus swimming and taekwondo one day or the other. So looks like he is getting enough physical activities as some had suggested that could be an issue.... but still does not matter.
    6. Tried waking him up early even if he sleep late. So he will be less productive, cranky but falling asleep is still an issue


    He takes 45 minutes and beyond - sometime an hr or 2 hrs to fall alseep

    it is interfering a lot with our work and his....and just not working out.

    What to do?
     
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  2. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Tell me about it! My DD is exactly like this. She is a tween now and still has trouble sleeping. Last night I woke up and was dry mouthed. Thought of getting some water and was shocked to see her still up and about at 12:30 am. She was coming down for water. It's an everyday struggle but I have a set bed time during school months. She has to be upstairs in her room after all the water drinking, bathroom usage et. No negotiations. She needs to turn off all electronic devices, put her books away and stay in bed. She does fall asleep sooner on days she has swim practice(swim team 1.5hrs 5 times a week). On. Weekends when she doesn't swim, she doesn't sleep. I just let her be and wake her up late. I figured as long as she is staying in bed on school nights and waking up in time for school, other times, she can have some fun. My DH is like this too. Plus both are light sleepers. A small peep from anywhere wakes them up and then they take forever to go back to sleep.
     
  3. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    Yeah well, we do send him to bed on time, by 8:45 on school days including weekends except we have party or soemthing. During summer by 9:30...but he still stay awake in his bed....i finish my work and go to 11 or after and find him awake.

    :(
     
  4. Kita

    Kita Senior IL'ite

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    Hi,
    It may sound funny but you can try to give some gift if he sleeps in time for atleast one week in initial days.....

    Try to fix one time for sleeping...it's will be difficult for you but you can try....let him be in bed even though he don't get sleep ....

    You have to be little strict with him.....many kids have sleeping problems....sometimes kids won't get sleep if they sleep, immediately after dinner... Atleast 2 hrs gap should be there between dinner and sleep...

    Hope you find solution for your problem soon....
     
  5. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    Yes gift idea, we have tried working out that, but he says he does not care for the gift becuase he knows he just can't sleep.

    About food, yes, doc told us the same, and we tried that. Issue with that is my son can eat only so much at a time. It kind of runs in family, my FIL, DH all have small tummy...and then need something every 2 hrs. So if we let him go to bed after 2 hrs of meal, and then after 30 minutes in bed, he is damn hungry that he has to eat else bad coughign starts. :( so we have started sending him after 30-40 minutes. or so after meal.
    Thanks for your reply but yes i hope we find some solution soon.
    Doc asked to give him melatonin and we are not up for it right now.
     
  6. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    BTW, at one point he was on border line for ADHD but many things have improved with age like his attention span, etc so not sure if ADHD is really impacting it.
     
  7. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Other than extreme activity there is nothing that works for us. The swim team is gruelling workout. They do ground exercises for 30-40 minutes and then swim for an hour. The swims are not leisurely. There are days when she gets back into the car and is zonked. I tried regular swim lessons but that didn't work. Try some team with regular game nights and practise sessions. If not, bike with him. My issue is I don't have the time to bike with my dd. She needs at least an hour. Btw, after hitting puberty she is better. She does get tired and needs more sleep. Not sure how it is with boys.
    Btw, if you do wake him up early, does he get upset and cranky during the day? Is he ever overtired?
     
  8. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    yes time to time he has done heavy biking and those days has not been any different but like you, we do not get a chance to do regularly and same thing with the team stuff. Days after school are tied up with Piano, math and english but still he does 45 mins tkd twice a week and swimming learning so good 45 minutes...plus 1-2 hrs of cricket playing...(just in summer break) and during school days they get about 40 mins of play time outside. So not sure if this is enough.

    If i wake him up early he will be really really sleepy and would not even hear our voice, with mutlipel shaking he will be awaken but steel drowsy....he is genreally not upset but yes cranky during the day and inspite that would not take afternoon nap or sleep early.

    Not sure what u mean by overtired but there are times, he says he is tired, his eyes r red watery but as soon as goes to bed he'd be fresh most of the time or keeps rubbing his eyes but wld not have fallen asleep.

    Only time he sleeps in 5 minutes is after jetlag....when we come back from india...even at 6pm, he will be knocked out in 5 mins...this will last for 5 days and then back to his normal tendency...why wld u ask this?
     
  9. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    Sleep patterns and adhd have a strong link. is your son a gifted child just wanting to rule out few things.
    if he has less than 11 hours of sleep is he still energetic. does he lag in his daytime activities or is he bright. if he is then maybe he is one of those who can get on with less sleep.

    my son had LD and was also hyperactive. he used to be so energetic after a wink of 10 minutes while i used to grapple to stay awake. a sigh of relief passes my lips now when i think of those years. what worked for me.

    music the calm recitals of flute/veena.
    asking him to stop thinking. he used to complain that he can't stop thinking. (i am wired that way. there were days i would draw electrical circuits in my sleep. even today i can't sleep if i am not able to work out a problem.) so we coached him to start thinking that he had the power to stop thinking. that he can switch off like we switch off lights. it worked for some time.
    we always made it a point to send him to bed an hour before the scheduled time. since he was into sports and early classes he had to get into bed by 8.45.

    now he is 16 and the time schedule has changed. the body clock of a teenager/(>10) goes through a changeover. the rhythm changes. the child who was comfortable sleeping early agetting up early does not know what hit him. he feels better sitting late in the night rather than waking up early.

    though these kids can go on deprived sleep for a few days, their body starts showing its displeasure soon.

    and heard melatonin helps but maybe you can wait out for a year or two and see if there is change at puberty...
     
  10. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    Thank you so much for insightful reply.

    - if he has less than 11 hrs sleep say 10 he is ok, but 9 or less , he still gets throught the day, he will be energetic for pleasure things like watching movies or playing....but anything which involves brain would be not the same otherwise. I know he is not the kind who needs less sleep. I have seen difference in his productivity when he has good night sleep vs when not.

    What is LD?

    I have always thought about sending to bed early but it never works out with school and activities

    Yes he is like that too...can't stop thinking...always wired. Even when he is very sleepy , tired and he understand that also, as soon as he hits the bed most of the time he is fresh. And if not, then he just cant fall asleep and keeps rubbing his eyes.
    Sleeping has been an issue since 5 weeks old. He left his afternoon nap as early as the age of 18 months.
    His sleeping problem has been such the melatonin was prescribed when he was 4 months old.


    I liked the idea of him having the power to switch off the thoughts....I am surely going to try that.

    I would have no issues if sleeping cycle keeps changing...just want to win over his struggle to fall asleep. not even expecting falling asleep in 15 minutes...but goal is to be asleep in 30 mins. 60-120 mins is just too much.
     

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