Do you have a special needs child??

padma,

Forget a mother with a MR. There are parents who just convert a small disablity into a bigger one to take advantage of the quota of physically handicapped. don't want to elaborate on that...

Where we all talk about good mothers there are some really worse ones..I wonder why did they become mother in the first place.

Regarding the mother's attitude, yes she will get a amount if the child goes to mr. sin is all the eyes of the one who sees..not the one who does.
The mother will say she prays to the lord..her sins will be washed....

Oh! Padma let me stop here...let me not get carried away...

shanti,

i am sorry if i have disturbed you by posting that incident here in this thread.

padma

padma,

Seriously, You have not disturbed me. It is just that I come across about stories that are so horrible that it sometimes makes me wonder...thats all..
let us keep discussing...

Hi Padma, Shanvy and all others!

This is the third time am typing this. Everytime I type and try to post, it gets deleted mysteriously. First and foremost, convey my wishes to Kirthi. And, if you please, read this post out to her, or call her and tell her what i have written here about.

I am Archana, 21 yrs old. Coming from a good educated family. Appa, own business. Amma, homemaker and taking care of business. One sibling - a lovely brother - This post is dedicated to tht idiot!

Anirudh, my brother was born in 1990. He is now almost 18 and is waiting to take his license. Nothing special till now. He is a dyslexic. He had the same problem Kirthi had - Dysgraphia. Also, he is an hyper active child. If the awareness level today, is like this, i hope you can imagine how it was 15 years back.

When he was 5 years, we first realised this problem. He startd writing "b" for "d" and read "mat" as "tam". He added what needs to be subtracted, and multiplied what needs to be divided. He did not learn to write his name till III std. All this were signs of the disorder, but all dismissed it as normal kids psychology. We come from a family of all academically smart kids( including me). So, he had to be compared with all in many occassions. For nearly 15 years of his school life, and 4 different schools ( all normal ones), he had never ever passed in all subjects, except his boards.

My mother fought it all alone, with me as a kid by her side. Lots of doctors, psychologists, learning centers etc. Even appa was not supportive, he told child will feel insecure, will feel bad if we put in a special school. All hue and cry if anirudh is mental or not. When ani was in 9th std, we got very scared. Took him to a child psychologist who advised us to put him a special school. ( He could not read tamil, and was told to take up 10th boards without language paper. We could not do anything, thanks to appa who felt doing all this will make his son feel bad - He was very loving to him. But, tht love did not do any good).

It is very disheartening to see, even immediate family misunderstanding a child's special needs. Me and amma, read about it online, in books, met doctors, spoke to teachers, attended all meeting, seminars etc to know more about how we can deal with the child. We used to record all his lessons, and play it for him.We taught him creative memory techniques, made him take virtual lessons etc.

Between all this, i have to tell one thing about my brother - He was very quiet, reserved child. Had great interest in cricket. Was a bowler. Loved music, still loves. Mad about cartoons. At 18, he watches POGO. And, the best part - He is a very very hard worker. He studies for 14-15 hours a day and smiles all through it. But fails. Can u imagine how miserable it is?

He never complains, his maximum entertainment was one game ( he shuts the system after the first game), or one show, or two rounds on his cycle. In his 10th std, me and my friend sat with him for 3 hrs( i was in college then), taught him lessons. He studied only 75% of his portions. He secured 65%.

He chose the commerce group, and was bad at studies even then. This was the time, we made him study atlast 12 hours a day. And he listened. He studied. Slowly, but steadily, by the end of the year, we became confident he will get through. Once again, he never passed in any school exams. And then, came the fruits of his efforts - 90% in his 12th std.All his teachers were amazed. His school was so full of surprise. My relatives, were all dumbstruck. My appa, who told him if he gets 60% is enough, felt so proud of his son. Amma and Me were the only two people who understood what it means to the child - The first victory. He basked in the joy. Never before he has felt it.

He chose to study computers, because he did not want accounts( For the first time, he left something because he did not want - not because he could not). He now studies at Madras Christian College. He badly wanted Loyola, but lost it by 2 marks.( For the first time, he is losing, but still winning). He is now in first year college, maintaining an average of 70%. He attends animaton, gaming classes. Wants to start his own animation studio.

I feel so proud to have him as my brother. Today - He is outspoken, courageous, smart, makes decisons, travels alone, talks to sponsors, teaches guys in college, wins prizes! My brother - Last got what he deserved!

I know he is destined to achieve more in life! Tell kirthi about this anna, who just worked hard and smiled all the way to it.

To all those, mothers with special children- Here's a sister and brother to everyone of them. Let them rule the world.

P.S: He thinks Taare Zameen Par is his film. Me and Amma saw him only in th first half of the film as Ishan.

Attached - Me and Anirudh. Check it out!

Archana,

Just happenend to read this thread and cud not help but write my thought.I m really proud of your family for standing by your brother at the time of his needs.. Hatts off to u Anuridh on your success and your willpower to win.Keep going with your efforts.. This family has really set a good example in this world.

Padma,

I m very sorry abt things happened to Kirthi.How cud teachers be so heartless to punish a small kid like that?.cmon Kirthi now u have got a very good role model(Anuridh).Keep your chin high and keep trying.Sure u will win like him oneday and become an inspiration to others.Never ever give up becoz of what other people say abt u.U know who u r and what u deserve.So never settle down with other people thoughts abt u.Show them that u deserve to win.

Archana,

Taare zameen par is a film based on how many ishaan's god knows. I feel the first step is for the parents to accept there is a problem in your child. and the next is to help him understand, by first understanding the problem

And hats off to your mom and to you, to believing in your brother and fighting along with him...that made the difference...your brother will definitely achieve greater laurels in life...all the best for his future endeavours....

(P.S. You brother and sister look cute ...)

Selvik

Thanks for stepping into the thread. yes, now we have a example in aniruddh.
I am yet to meet kirthi, but I have come to know she is going in for maths olympiad. she is good at chess and is good at singing. She has a great friend in her sister.

And with the way she is rearing she will be achieving great laurels.

..as I feel if god makes you weak in something, he compensates by giving us the strength to convert it to our best...

I agree with shanvy, Theya re seriosuly great in something else. After Anirudh, i have met a lot of kids( 4-5 yrs old), who are studying in special schools. Extremely diligent, comes up with off beat ideas. And about Kirthi, All that she needs to do is to be earnest and work smart. The rest will be taken care of by her school, her lovely parents and well-wishers like us. She just need not worry!After all, We all know academics is not the only thing important in life. Am sure she will be a value enriched child, which is what the world wants!

dear archana,

you both are so nice, what a nice sister anirudh has...............
thank you so much for the concern you have shown for krithi................tears are rolling, i should definitely meet you, your mother and your brother....................i want krithi to meet this new anna in her life.............. so that she is happy..............gains more confidence in herself............
thanks archana dear..............

with all these pressures, sometimes i shout at krithi so badly...................nobody understands me and her...............except her sister ankitha, but she is also a kid.
how much can i expect from that kid..............krithi, ankitha and myself form a nice group...........we enjoy the company........................
now her father wants to take krithi out of that school, he says she is not dyslexic, when compared to other kids in that school...............i know very well, if krithi is taken out of that school, she will again suffer in the mainstream schools................i am praying that she should continue for another year or two.........and she can take up exams in NIOS, Open School...............later she can specialize in whatever subjects she is interested in the college, so everyday is not the same in our house.........with krithi's problems............i have to handle everyone, with support from you people i manage each........

bye dear
love
padma