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Any second DIL or Youngest DIL here?

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Renu1999, Feb 5, 2010.

  1. Renu1999

    Renu1999 Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi,
    we have lot of thread regarding being first DIL and only DIL? I know those two are the worst. Is there any Youngest DIL or second DIL to the family. Being youngest DIL does it make your life happy ? Please share your views.
     
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  2. Redlady

    Redlady New IL'ite

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    hi

    iam very new to this forum, but silent reader for many days.
    Yes am the second DIL. Everything was fine with me n elder dil in the family, just hi bye relationship, but problems started when other one entered. Now Fil doesnot speak to me bcoz of some fights and i also dont care about speaking to him and i also dont speak to new co sis nad her husband.
     
  3. kma

    kma Gold IL'ite

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    I am a second and youngest DIL in my family. I am sure that this is not the case with all families but my cosis behaves almost like a second MIL with me. Part of the reason could be the lenience my MIL gives to her and part her own belief that younger ones should always listen to the elder DILS. Not just me, she even gets away with commenting my DH also and nobody says anything to her may be because they dont want to spoil relations with my BIL.And all this when she is only an year elder to me and infact younger than my DH.

    There are lots of friendly advices how to conduct my married life, how much to cook and how much to serve and sometimes not so friendly barbs also.

    What I noticed is that if MIL is strong, she will not let any DIL rule the house. All the DILs are treated the same. If the MIL is good, then also she will treat all equally. If she is more dependent emotionally like my MIL on one son or daughter , these things happen.
     
    Last edited: Feb 5, 2010
  4. MrsV

    MrsV Bronze IL'ite

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    Me! I am the youngest. My BIL's wife is considered my age, but she's about 11 older months than me. And I married MIL's baby.

    It's sad, I sometimes feel that MIL is a different person with me. BIL is 12 years older than me and his wife, and he was divorced before, so the fact that he got a young wife is like a big freakin' deal to my MIL. DH and I are 2 1/2 years apart, and she made a comment, there should be a minimum of 5 years difference between a husband and wife or else marriages don't work out :crazy EXCUSE ME?? And I shot back telling her, well five is max otherwise, the wife will have to call her husband uncle and that shut her up.

    And now that they have a kid, she expects us to go all the way down to go see them. We usually send gifts everytime they go and we have been there multiple times as well over the course for the past year. And when there's a long weekend, when DH and I plan something for ourselves, she rants. Meanwhile, BIL and his family has been upto NY numerous times in the past 18 months, visited us once he stopped by to see our apt, and left because he had to put coins into parking meter!!! Now that we have our own place, never visited us and of course MIL thinks its perfectly fine because we shouldn't expect them to come to us when they visit MIL and FIL.

    Thanks for listening to my craziness.. :bowdown
     
    Last edited: Feb 6, 2010
  5. anonymous2011

    anonymous2011 Senior IL'ite

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    Iam the first DIL, my hubby and his bro are twins, my BIL is not yet married, and I have only one SIL which I don't interact at all
     
  6. maya69

    maya69 Gold IL'ite

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    Me! I am the third and the youngest dil. My in laws must have given all the trouble to the eldest dil (which was way before I married into the family) cuz they are pretty good to me. Must have learned from their mistakes with the first one! But thankfully I get long with my eldest co-sis as well and we discuss this a lot as she lives close by...I can clearly see that our inlaws treat her differently than they treat me..and we have agreed that will never change no matter how much bending over backward my eldest co-sis does. I think its her husbands (my eldest BIL)fault....he let his parents interfere too much in those early days of marraige and told them too much about his marital troubles and so she became the bad outsider!
     
  7. chocolate

    chocolate Platinum IL'ite

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    I am the youngest and the second DIL . My in laws rather my FIL-SIL team have unleashed all their demented frustrations on me.My SIL is the devil in guise of a woman and my FIL a sadist with motive to destroy anybody who opposes his wishes. The same is transferred to my SIL.:rant:rant.Nobody shud be punished into having them as in laws much less call them educated.
     
  8. puttolika

    puttolika New IL'ite

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    • heyyy ! i[m the youngest DiL in my family. My problem isn't my SiL cz she lives abroad doesnt pay much attention to whats happening here in home. She is happily busy in her own life and occasionally she keeps in touch with us. I think, this is good cz she is not interfaring on anything. Problem is my MIL... she thinks that my SiL is irresponsible and always my MiL talks bad things about her which i dont like. Again i have no idea whats my Mil's problem, she use to compare me with my SiL whch me & my SiL find very funny. :crazy
      Problem i'm facing tht is, Being the second & youngest child, my hubby is still a kid to her and she often has a complain abt me tht im not taking proper care of her son.. she decides what to give him on breakfast, what to give him on tiffin and so on... even if i do accordingly she always finds mistakes and taunt me... at first, i ignored them. but now can't tolerate anymore. I tried to share it with my hubby but he strictly says that , don't talk abt this.. i dnt wanna hear anything negative abt my mom... i dont know what to do... :bowdown
     
  9. sita2223

    sita2223 Bronze IL'ite

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    I am the only DIL, so no relation to this post, but just wanted to say -

    I am in the exact same boat as you Chocolate. :drowning God save me from my evil SIL and selfish/immature FIL.
     
  10. cutesmile09

    cutesmile09 Silver IL'ite

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    Hi,

    Iam the youngest daughter & youngest DIL,yep my inlaws,Bil & co-sister treat me like a small kid,they treat me as if i dont knw anything( inspite of me being so matured than them). My BIL & Co-sister behaves like second IL's :bonk ( My BIL is 2yrs elder to me and co-sis is 2yrs younger to me) but i really dont care wht they think, i just carry on with my life as me&DH desires...
     

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