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Very stingy in-laws!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Lina05, Oct 11, 2009.

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  1. Oct 13, 2009 #11
    Lina05

    Lina05 New IL'ite

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    Dear SriVidya,thanks for your message. I answered today on my other thread , Lina :)
     
    Lina05, Oct 13, 2009
    Lina05, Oct 13, 2009
    #11
  2. Oct 13, 2009 #12
    Lina05

    Lina05 New IL'ite

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    Hi Ladies,

    thank you all for your replies. Yes, you are right, I probably should stop thinking about why they never call me for my birthday or send me little gift (like some mehndi or chudiyan) on Karwa Chaut. It´s just, that when your friends or cousins tell you how their in-laws treat them with love and
    like a daughter but not daughter-in-law, it sometimes just makes me sad.

    Well, the thing is my fiance is their only son, so I will be the only bahu of the family. I can´t understand why they don´t want t have a good relationship with me.

    I know, no matter how stingy they are and even if they can´t show any love for me (for e.g. birthday call) I still have to respect them, but it´s hard. I think as you all said, I will just stop expecting anything from them. I will respect them, but I will also stop to do too much from my side to make them happy and please them ... I mean do they deserve my love if they treat me like that?
     
    Lina05, Oct 13, 2009
    Lina05, Oct 13, 2009
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  3. Oct 14, 2009 #13
    Sumathii

    Sumathii New IL'ite

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    Hi

    My 2 cents...

    Giving a gift to someone is related to our own happiness. The happiness that we get on seeing the other person happy is very unique. Although, sometimes it tends to become more of a social obligation, however gifts are to be given purely with the intention of getting a pleasure of gifting.
    Please do not expect that since you are gifting things, the same should be reciprocated by the other person. This is not a business or barter system.
    Your future in laws may have other methods of showing love and affection than by gifting.
    If you are very curious, then maybe you should try and figure out the reason behind their behavior.
    Once you become a part of the family, if you feel that the gifting habit should be developed, you should slowly and effective develop the same in them. Maybe they have never realised the importance of gifting all these years.
    Please throw aside all the negative thoughts that you have for them. In the larger scheme of things, these small issues do not matter. They could always be suggested and corrected.
    P.s. If you are gifted something, you should accept it without passing comments.
    Sorry, to have been very open in my words and thoughts. However, the intention was that you should not consider these small issues. You are going to start a life with them and start it on a good note.
    Good luck for your marriage
     
    Sumathii, Oct 14, 2009
    Sumathii, Oct 14, 2009
    #13
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