Between FILs & SILs ( Sons-in law) !!!

Dear Friends,
I find most of the threads in the forum, relating to relationship with in-laws, are ‘female centrics’ – as between DIL, MIL, SIL (sis-in-Law), in various permutation & combinations, with some amount of FIL thrown in. Being a SIL of male species (Son-in-Law), I thought of introducing this thread on the relationship between FILs and SILs, as a diversion. These are as experienced / observed by me and need not be universally true.

As between MILs & DILs, something perhaps develops between SIL ( <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comffice:smarttags" /><st1lace w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Son</st1:City> <st1:State w:st="on">IL</st1:State></st1lace>) & FIL also over a period. It could be due to FILs feeling deep within that someone had come to share / challenge the love of their daughter. Or was it to prove to their daughter & wife that they were still one shade better than the newer generation - I don't know. But, it surfaces despite all their ‘so called’ mutual love & admiration.

My relationship with my FIL was more “ Tom & Jerryish”, with loads of fun & mutual leg pulling. (However, ofcourse, if ever there was any difficult situation that arose for him, I was the first one my FIL came to for consultation & help. Similarly, if he got to know I was in need of some help, he rushed even without being asked. )
Come to think of it, even my dad used to cut a joke on his SILs - that they had two great qualities - "Sonnalum Puriyadhu; Thankkavum Theriyadhu "( Neither would they understand if told; nor would they themselves understand). But, they also shared an excellent relationship throughout.

Let me relate my first close encounter with my FIL. It happened during my ‘getting to know’ visit to my in-laws, immediately after my marriage. FIL was a freedom fighter in INA (Netaji's army) and had penned his experiences in a thick black diary. I invited trouble by an innocuous remark showing interest about his INA days. He immediately handed over the fat diary for my reading pleasure during the stay- To read his manuscript was a 'free & compulsory' enjoyment provided to me. Worser still, my FIL used to query me on whatever I was supposed to have read, 3 times a day - at the break-fast, lunch and dinner table and all along I was supposed to look pleased with this experience, being a new son-in-law on his first visit to sasural's place. I was compelled to fall in line in order not to offend my newly wedded wife, which I could ill afford then. Perhaps I looked more like a trapped mouse and I had a lurking feeling that my FIL enjoyed my predicament to the hilt. Those days there were no TVs and the options available while at home were between interacting with my FIL on his autobigraphy and /or wartime achievements or to read his manuscript. I preferred to pretend reading, only to be caught lateron durng the next food table assembly. Neither my wife nor my MIL could do much to save me from the clutches of my FIL. I would only notice symapthy oozing out of their eyes - which made me feel more "Jerry"ish.
'Torture'y, unadhu paer mamanaro? ( Torture! Is thy name FIL?)

What a relief I felt on the day of my departure! I was pleased with myself that despite all my FIL's manevoures & pressure tactics, I managed to escape with reading only the first few pages.

Subsequently, my FIL published his memoires as a book and Higginbothams reported sale of 40 & odd copies during the first two weeks or so. I felt thrilled to realise that there were a few 'Brahaspatis' who ended up shelling out Rs 100 for the "entertainment" that I got ‘free & compulsory’.:rotfl

My FIL is no more now. May his soul rest in peace!

In fact, we remained good friends till his very end - with many a Tom & Jerry episodes thrown in between. What ever it be, our interactions kept my kids in raptures. Going by his own admission to the children, I understand that he enjoyed the interactions as much as I did.
I salute him for providing me & kids so much of fun. :bowdown


P.S. : Taking a leaf out of my FIL's initiative to 'bore' the new son-in-law into submission during his first sasural visit itself, I also readied one manuscript of my Tamil poems, short stories and anecdotes - authored from my college days- for my new son-in-law. But he was smart enough to dodge me successfully the entire seven days he spent at our place, despite all my self proclaimed smartness. In retrospect, I am convinced that it was possible only with the connivance of my wife and daughter. 'Ettappans' or more precisely " Ettappis" within the family. :rant

Cheers!
Rrg

 

Dear Preethi,
Greetings!
At the outset, let me express my gratitude to you, for nominating this post to FP of July '09.:bowdown
Also, thanks a tonne for your compliments. I am pleased to note that you enjoyed both my posts on relationship topics.
You said it right.
I write for busting the stress of the reader by tickling their funny bones and make them laugh. When the reader gets back to me and tells me that the post was hillarious and he / she laughed to their heart's content, my day is made. This, I consider the biggest award and thank God for providing me with such an opportunity.
Time permitting, I suggest you read my short stories and non-fiction anecdotes in IL. I am sure you would equally enjoy them.
Cheers!
Rrg

 

Dear Happy,
Thanks for your compliments!:bowdown
Yes, my FIL was a very simple but a great person.
We did 'enjoy' a special relationship.
I miss him & our interactions.

Perhaps you may like to read my other post "I am always right" in me & my spouse column.
Unforunately, most of my stories contain transliterated Tamil words. Otherwise, I could have recommended my short stories as also non-fiction anecdotes.
Cheers & wishing you all the very best!
Rrg

 

Dear Happy,
Thanks for bothering to reply.
Your suggestion of my opening a blog in IL makes sense. Thanks!
Initially I was not very sure as to how well my posts would be received in a predominantly ladies forum like IL.
Also, with opening a blog comes the responsibility of regular updating / posting. Given my present personal & professional committments, I am not sure how far would I be in a position do justice and fulfill this responsibility.
Still, I would certainly consider opening a blog soon, at least for bringing all my posts under one section, for the benefit of those who may want to read them.
Cheers!
Rrg

 

Dear Sunshine,
Thanks for your appreciation. Please go through my other posts and let me have your views. It would help.
Cheers!
Rrg