How to care for sick MIL

How does one take care of a MIL needing palliative care? She needs help with feeding, bath, using the toilet and cleaning.

DIL is working and is not in a position to quit working to make financial ends meet.

Is anyone aware of services that offer palliative care in India? Or do you make do with a servant/nurse? Are these services available round the clock?

Has anyone heard of Portea nursing care in this regard?

 

The city would be Bangalore or Hyderabad.

Thanks for offering to check Hrastro. Appreciate your reply.

 

Thanks for replying Shanvy. I was hoping you would. I am aware of all that you have done for your inlaws and admire the way in which you have been able to beautifully balance the needs of the older generation and your kids along with your health issues. You are an inspiration to me.

Approx what kind of cost are we talking about here? I would like to get a rough idea.
I agree with you that the reliability of the nurses is a big issue and that someone to supervise them should be available. In this case I am not sure that is a distinct possibility.

Lots of questions, ifs and buts....

 

Thanks for replying Malstrom. Do all hospitals do this or is it a select few like Appollo etc Which hospital did you use for your grandma?

 

Thanks for your reply Ragini25.

To give a little more background, the DIL does not live in India. However when her FIL was ill, she lived in India at MIL's place to support FIL for 18 months while her husband lived abroad. Also in the 6 years of their married life she has continually shuttling between the 2 countries to help care for FIL's ill health, her own father's health, SIL's wedding etc. She has spent around 4 years apart from her husband. This took a toll on their marriage, kids (having to straddle between 2 different cultures). Also due to these issues, visa issues etc she could not work. Very recently she started working and has a highly reputed education background.

Viewing MIL as her mom has only brought in headaches and she is going to her MIL now on. The DILs perspective is that its her duty to care for her in laws and she has to do it.

Also MIL is suffering from a progressive degenerative disease that has no known cure so far. Its not an accident from which she will recover so DIL can put her career at the backburner for a couple of months and get back to work.

TO add to the woes, MIL's condition is a genetic abnormality which means her husband and kids could welll be carriers of the gene. Her husband has other health issues due to which they have been planning to get free from teh corporate grind. In that respect her working is vital.

I dont understand how things will change if DIL's own mom is the patient in this case. The underlying issues remain the same.

Apart from the practical issues I believe that its not possible to treat MIL on par with mom when you looking after them for a prolonged period say 5 or 10 or 20 years, no one knows until when.... Everyone does not have the emotional make up to be a care-giver for a long period of time. This is from my own experience. My mom who took care of my bedridden grandma for a long while ( 4 years) suffers from depression, OCD issues and social isolation.

WHo attends to the little kids' needs, who takes care of their studies, household chores and ensures that there is adequate cashflow to insure their present and future?