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Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by sweetestshweta, Oct 21, 2014.

  1. sweetestshweta

    sweetestshweta Gold IL'ite

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    After last week's heavy outpour by my MIL,things are moving towards normalcy.
    She said what not to H-called him selfish,rude,not caring,miser etc etc,but DH heard it all and later told me that she is old and hence we shouldn't retaliate.

    So that was all.We returned in the evening-she kept a long face.DH was extra nice to her,he kept sitting with her whole evening-assuring her that he thinks a lot about MIL,SIL and her kids and he will always take care of them blah blah..
    I kept quiet and stayed away.Took care of DD,cooked,asked MIL a couple of times for tea etc and after serving dinner,retired to my room while DH was with her till 11PM..

    Not a word on the issue after that.They both are normal now.He told me to forget it all and doesn't like to discuss about it.I can see him taking extra care of MIL,talking more frequently with SIL and her kids.
    SIL is coming today to celebrate Diwali with her kids here.
    ALL seem to be happy and they all are one happy family again..
    I feel like a fool:thumbsdown

    Even when such bad behaviour and outburst by MIL didn't invoke any sense in my husband's mind,will anything ever will??

    I want MIL to disclose her evil side more like last week..What last week happened was the first of its type in all these years..
    Any suggestions how I can tickle her without being direct and lead her to give such performances more often??
    DH is deaf,dumb and blind to see her and SIL's mind games..Only such direct revelations from them might help him wake up from his slumber
     
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  2. Stressfull

    Stressfull Silver IL'ite

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    Dear op,

    better remember "blood is thicker than water", its waste of our energy to think about bring out original face of someone's, do u think ur husbabnd doesn't know about anything regarding mil & sil. even if god directly comes and tells this to so called dear husbands "don't believe your mother", they will stop beleieving the god immediately but they never stop believing their mother. Yes I mean it.

    I think its better to ramble to god than this walls, that atleast our children generation( future generation) girls lifes should be more happy and peaceful, and the children of that generation should be able to see what is good and what is bad more clearly. as of now we cant do anything other that.

    p.s: accept life as it is if ur hubby is good to u in person, rest all is his headaches not ur's. life will be more peaceful.jmo
     
  3. Reesha

    Reesha Silver IL'ite

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    swetha,

    Husbands are like that only. even he understood what is going on , he can't do any thing in case of mothers & sisters. just try to understand his position too. he can't say back to his mother crying tears because it is which he don't want to see when he is caring her.

    let's time be pass. slowly, let him know what your's main family is loosing because of MIL & SIL. because of SIL regular visitings, your's family spending time is decreasing & money is wasting much which should go to savings account for you DD purpose .let him know it. may be some change in him.
     
  4. internetmom

    internetmom Silver IL'ite

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    In my opinion, your dh did understand everything and that is why he refused to talk about it with you. Remember we do not want to talk about negative things of our parents with any one else, even if spouse, or may be more so with spouse because he knows you do not like her. He may at times go and ventilate his frustration with any close frnd, if any, about this but not with you.

    Just leave it dear. If they are good again. let them be good. You be good with your parents and others as well. I know it is difficult because being good with them almost inevitably means bad things towards you, that is why women try so hard to make their dhs see the 'real' face of their kins. But it is not possible most of the time dear. Just put across the message that 'do whatever you want among yourself, but know that i will not put up with any non-sense form you' and try to enjoy your own life on this line. be stubborn about your own rights and your share of joy and happiness with your dh and dd, rest is not your botheration.
     
    Last edited: Oct 21, 2014
    3 people like this.

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