Irritated with MILs unhealthy cooking

Next time before she cooks anything, casually bring up your conversation with her. Say doctor said he will feel sick if he eats following foods. Write / type up a list of foods to avoid and tell her that doctor gave u this list and you thought it was important to share with her as she is his mom. Make her feel nice about her cooking first and say we love your cooking so much but its really sad for DH he cannot eat his favourite ghar ka khanna. Ask her for tips to make acceptable foods more ghar style and she will enthusiastically come up with ideas of how to make acceptable foods taste even better. Always with MILs - put them on pedestal first - It's a win-win situation. You should make her want to help you - that is the trick.

 

Your husband needs to understand that it is up to him to control what goes into his mouth. He isn't a three year old to be force fed; and I don't even force feed my three year old! If he won't show restraint, there isnt a whole lot you can do.

After you explain to your mil about what not to make, if she still makes unhealthy stuff, here's what you do. Without any fuss or talk, just go, make what is suitable over and above at an has done. Sweetly say you really need to follow the regimen set by your DH's doctor; no problem; you would make thing yourself; make it; serve it; for it the unhealthy stuff when your husband is at the table; sweetly say the extra food she has made could directly to into the fridge or freezer for another day, mil can get some much needed rest. Be prepared for drama but shrug and pay no attention. Just say, sorry you are taking it this way; my husband needs to be cared for; since you arent helping him follow the doctor's orders, I'll handle it. End of chapter as far as you are concerned. Once any drama doesn't get the desired effect, it will stop. You need to just be firm and polite

 

Your husband is suffering from Acidity, vomit and everything that is caused by this so called food cooked by MIL. He is a grown up married male, and an Adult to understand that certain type of foods to be avoided during this time of peak acidity. He has a voice, and a language skill to explain this in a way, so that his dear mom won't get upset about it.
Since this matter is between a mom and a son, let them sort it out as per their own comfort level.
I would have been worried if the cook is my maid or some new person who is outside of my DH's family. Even if that is my own mom.. Because I can very well raise my voice as the first and only guardian to my H in that place. Here this is his own mom, and he has been eating this since his childhood. You have come to his life only for the past 9 months or so.... let him handle as per his own space.

I know it will be worrysome to know someone dear to us undergo this and unable to get rid of this. It seems your H just nods his head to whatever you say in an affirmation to please you, but he just does what he pleases. Else, he would have simply avoided this food cooked my his mom by giving whatever the reasons. If there is a will, there is a way,.. You see...

So, give both of them the needful advise in any case they are unaware of this acidity and their food habit. Leave them at that.
You can wake someone who is actually sleeping, but not the one who pretends to be sleeping.

My advice would have been different if your child is in your H's place. Because he/she then won't be an adult to make his own decisions.

 

Dear OP ,
It's not that the food cooked is not tasty..it's just that your DH can't have it right? Next time she makes, even after you telling her not to, just sit with your DH for dinner and you have loads of that so that he does not get it enough and say that the food is so tasty that you can't resist eating... You can also try finishing it before he starts to eat or even before he comes home by this way...you get 2 birds with 1 bullet! Your DH won't get to eat it plus your Mil is all the more happy!

 

Let your suffering husband deal with it Op.
If he doesn't want to upset his mother ...why should you?You think he will think highly of you if you raise the issue and it results in her getting upset and emotional.It is a no win situation for you.

If she can't understand even after seeing her son suffer then not much you can do about it.

Some mothers have only cooking to show for themselves...even if it hurts their own family.

Just tell husband that may be he should tell her not to cook such food as your saying it will create problems and you will be accused of coming between mother and son.If he wants to get better...let him get the spine to tell his mother to stop.You stock up on digene,pudin hara and eno ....be the nurse.

Don't come between the son and mom in this issue.You will be hurt in the crossfire.

If she forces you to eat...then you raise the issue.

 

Most probably Eating unhealthy food outside for long may have caused his ill health . Did doctor suggest that he should not be eating gavar ki Sabzi. Get a diet chart from dr for your husband and follow it . Also instead of blaming your mil , why don't you pack him healthy food , snacks for his travel , better still why don't you accompany him to make sure he gets his good food in his travel .

 

but out how much do you think OP can eat. I do not think she will be able to finish everything, if it is cooked for 4 people.

 

As your husband to tell her to mother, you dont tell to her which will offend her even if you are telling good things. If your husbands agrees with you , then he can tell to his mother that has started some diet based on doctors tip(or) tell that doctor has suggested some pills if it doest get well he might needs to under go a surgery and that will but him in bed for 2 weeks (no office) and it will affect his insurance related items. That way she will get that and it will no offend her too.

I cant just believe that your MIL wants her son to suffer , it might be you are making it up to a notch due to internal issue with you and your mil . Anyway instead of commenting on your MIL without knowing what she has to say about this , I am wondering if your DH is telling something that is making her to do all this like ...
Mom I miss the yummy things that you make in my childhood ?, or saying my wife cooks well but nothing can match your receipes .. something he might have told and she is taking that to mind and preparing all these stuff....

Anyway the solution is your husband talking to your MIL instead you getting between them.

 

Next time your husband has to go to the doctor, ask your MIL to accompany you. Tell her that it would be best for both of you to get instructions on what to do and what not to do so that even if you forget, she can remind you (make it look like you need her help in keeping DH healthy...she will never refuse). This way she can hear straight from the doctor's mouth what is a total no-no. Once the doctor gives the diet orders, YOU ask the questions that will drive home the point to MIL.