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MIL always around

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by bloregal, Jul 18, 2014.

  1. bloregal

    bloregal Senior IL'ite

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    Hi ILites,


    Just had something to share with you guys because cant speak about the same to anyone else. My problem however seems very small compared to the problems I read with others here on IL.

    I get somewhat irritated at times as I feel my MIL tries to be like my dhs shadow all the time.. I mean she always wants to be around him..and that too always when I also join my Dh.. If i tell this to DH I know he
    will again start screaming so thought will share with you guys.
    Ofcourse my DH takes some time out daily and we go out for walk or shopping or things like that but then I wonder what makes her so desperate to stick to us everytime..she never lived with her ILs so can never understand how a DIL in a joint family feels.

    There are times I feel What my dh would feel like if my mom called me once in every 2 hrs to check how I m or anything like that..my mom always tells she should not try to show like showering too much love on daughter however attached she is because it will make it tougher for a married couple to bond faster.. Why don't MILs I mean a guys mother ever thing that way?
     
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  2. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Op...sticking with the son after his marriage is a favorite hobby of mils.
     
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  3. YoGirl

    YoGirl Gold IL'ite

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    MILs still treat their sons as boys and keep protecting and advising them so that they won't do anything wrong...but at the same time, assume that DIL entered the house my learning everything and should handle everything by herself....
    Funny though!!
     
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  4. neetugtb

    neetugtb Silver IL'ite

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    Trying to show you who has the first right over the man of the house.

    Let me tell you an other way around story. One of my co sis who had a love marriage is always, well not actually but literally, almost sitting on the lap of my BIL when among the family members, god knows what she does when they are alone but we all, including my MIL, SIL other co sis and men all enjoy the sighting and laugh as it seems that someone is going to steal him from under her nose even after almost 24 years of marriage. Imagine my BIL is not permitted to go out alone with his friends, to family functions or to parties. He can only go when she accompanies him and I don't know for sure if has any friends or boys group as she has the exclusive right to his friendship. Strange and funny but :thumbsup for my BIL's patience. So, you see there are wives too that can claim the first right! Hope it inspires ILs to rein in their DH from the beginning itself!
     
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  5. TheUnhappyWife

    TheUnhappyWife Silver IL'ite

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    While all the ladies are absolutely bang on, I'd add another reason - so many MILs suffer from Dependent Personality Disorder!

    @neetugb - Your anecdote was very funny. LOL!
     
    Last edited: Jul 18, 2014
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  6. JustLikeYou

    JustLikeYou Gold IL'ite

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    Wow...this is exactly the term that i was looking for to describe my MIL. Somehow this terminology makes me feel so happy and it convinces me that my MIL does indeed have a disorder....good job...unhappywife...
     
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  7. bloregal

    bloregal Senior IL'ite

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    Yes like neetu said I feel like she tries to show me who has first right over the man in the house.gigglingsmiley
    when I once asked my DH why she mostly likes spending time and taking more care of you than her Dh and elder son he said because he s the younger one and she has never stayed away from him whereas elder son lived away most of the time.. But later I realized my DH stayed away from them for more time than the elder one.. He was away from bangalore for 7 years.. Only a few months before our marriage he had come back to Blore..all this love and attachment after I come:idontgetit:




    thanks for all the replies ILs I feel so much better after sharing this with someone
     
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  8. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    some of your replies cracked me up! Thanks for making my morning....

    yes my MIL also suffers from Dependent Personality Disorder
     
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  9. Ragini25

    Ragini25 Platinum IL'ite

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    Truth is maybe all have DPO.
    for example, slightest stress, and if we run to indusladies to write a thread or post, then isnt that dependency on IL? (IL : Not inlaws but DPO on indusladies :)
    so many of us in world have dpo :)
     
  10. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    it is not DPO, actually Stress Reliving Mechanism - just like yoga is.
     
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