SIL wearing MY sarees WITHOUT asking !!! What to do?

I think you should let this one go, I understand that sarees have a great value to us ladies but if they were that important you wouldn't have left them. Whatever clothes I value I bring it with me.
Now I don't know how your relationship is with your Inlaws and sil but if your sister wore your clothes would you get this upset? When we were kids we would get upset yes,but we are not kids anymore.
Sarees and clothes can be bought back with money but once the peace in your family is destroyed you can't buy that anywhere.i would say let it go and ask your husband to buy you some nice sarees and salwars when you go to India! This is just my opinion!

 

Hi dear,

You are entitled to either like or not like what other people do with your things.

If your SIL is otherwise a nice person, while you are alone (i.e. without DH or MIL or anyone else overhearing on phone/ skype/ whatever), you could try commenting offhand to your SIL "That looks a lot like my saree!". If she admits that it is indeed yours, just tell her very politely, "Please don't mistake me. I do not like sharing my clothes."

If she is one of those persons who you think causes trouble, then, keep quiet now; on your next trip to India, take ALL your good clothes to your mum's place leaving the ones you don't care about at your DH's. (I did exactly the latter and about 8 years later, the wretched old clothes are still there in a suitcase in MIL's house; no one has touched them!)

Good luck.

Love,
G

 

It is ok if she wears it, agree it is not polite she did not tkae permission..so show her u do not mind but u know what she is doing. Well, just catch her offhand....syaing o i saw you wearing my this and that. It looked really good on you. I m glad it fits you, it really suits you well. I am glad my clothes got good company. BTW, if you do not mind can you leave pink sari and red salwar as mom gave me as gift? Rest take as it pleases you, get t alter whatever needed. And when i come to india, you'd help to buy new - latest desgin one which I would carry to US.

 

You should have locked them in a box. Since you did not, this is expected. I would say let it go. Next time be careful.

 

Yessie...Let go of it...

What she did is not right but nothing can be done too...

 

i always loves to share my things with my SIL and i consider her as my sister ..........and my husband is very happy that we share a good bond........

 

A lot of ILs think of dil's possessions as their own. I don't think it would be appropriate to tell her not to wear your clothes. If possible tell them to send the clothes to you, if you have someone coming from India or on your next trip take them with you or store them at your parents.
When I left Ils home, I handed my almirah keys to my ILs and told them to use my stuff if they wanted to. But that doesn't mean everyone should do that. Some of us are more attached to our belongings than others. We all have different preferences and values.

 

Hello Sweet,

My Suggestion may help you or may not help you ...dunno! but trying is worth though. Pin-pointing or directly saying to her will come out as big scene or a place for back-bites about you. Try to play tactically, for example suggestion: Call you SIL and say.....My clothes has been over there for more of months which i wish to give out for a dry-cleaning and ironing to avoid stinkness. My mom will be coming out there to collect the clothes and to drop into dry-cleaner shop. Please help her.....

So that, you can safe-guard at ur moms place n hands itself forever.....

Try as like this something which could be best and also non-hurting .......sorta...

 

I don't have any practical solution for this. Just penning my thoughts.

I don't have a sister and I am not used to sharing my clothes with others. Even if some people are comfortable sharing clothes, I think it is basic decency to ask your permission before wearing your clothes - that too altering it and wearing!
:shock:

sweetshreya, can you first make sure that it is true and you have not mistaken your SIL? May be atleast she did not alter the clothes? Because it might cause you some problem if it turns out you were mistaken.

Anyway, if this is true, I would have been livid had I been in your position. :rant

Or are your in-laws such nice people that they consider you as family and so "take rights" with you? One way I can justify this behaviour is if your SIL will not mind if you use her clothes without her permission. Even if that is the case, I still don't prefer to share my clothes. But atleast it might explain her behaviour.