Need Guidance & Prayers of Sai Devotees..

Dear All,

This is my first thread in IL and writing to you all seeking guidance. All in our family believe in God and also devotees of Baba. With Baba's grace, we have a son, who just turned 3 last week. He was born preterm and not very healthy yet. By God's grace, nothing precarious...but keeps falling sick, due to low immunity and underweight. He looks small & can't say he is 3 years old. Basically a very very fussy eater and hence weak. All his developments have been little delayed, though no doctor has raised any concern about it. Only a minor delay and whenever he does it, he has been doing it perfectly. He started talking properly only around 6 months back...still his pronounciation is not yet clear. He goes to playschool and has learnt a lot...he is intelligent for sure and picks up fast and understands everything. As of now, he is very poor in social skills and doesn't speak to outsiders so easily, though he is comfortable with them.

This is just a background of my son...and though I have always been worried over every step, by experience and by God's grace, I have learnt that there is nothing to worry so much and know that everything will be okay, with time.

But my current concern is that now that he is 3, as per the age regulations here, he is eligible to attend LKG in the coming academic year (2013-14). I have taken the application and his interview is due in january 2013. But, from the beginning, I have had this doubt that considering his poor health and small stature, eating habits, etc, why not wait for one more year to put him in school when he would be 4+. My husband was not as worried as me and he said he will manage. Around 1.5 months back, when we got the application, we were totally indecisive and decided that we will ask Baba regarding this. My husband had just then started the Saibaba 9 week vrat, which will be completed next week. We decided that we will complete the 9 weeks puja and in the last week, we will put chits and ask Baba for guidance and do as per his direction, regarding school admission. We have never done this chits thing before, but we thought this time we will do it and Baba will answer us.

In the meanwhile, we got to know many other friends and more information on schooling, interview process, our friends kids' ages, etc and all these information provided some clarity to us and though we felt that academically, our son would manage, still it would be taxing on him and felt that it is better to wait one more year.

But now, the confusion is that since we have decided to ask Baba and now thinking otherwise, will it be right. Even now, I want to ask Baba next week, when my husband completes puja...but there is a small doubt in the mind that if baba tells otherwise, what to do. It would appear like we are not trusting Baba fully...but that's not the case. I don't know how to explain myself...but am in total confusion.

I feel like I have hurt Baba by not relying on him fully and having this doubt in mind. To comfort my confusion, my husband says that let's not put the chits and assume that the clarity that we have now is also given by Baba only and proceed on our decision. But, I am not convinced by it.

I feel that next week, when the vrat is over, both of us should apologise to Baba for the change of mind & doubt that came in us and surrender to him and then take the chits and proceed by his advise.

In this matter, I need the guidance and opinion of my fellow dear devotees of Baba in this regard. Should I draw the chits or not? Will Baba be hurt by this? Should I apologise for our doubt and proceed with the chits?

Totally confused...pls advise.

 

Dear Saisakthi sister,

Thankyou so much. Feeling so good that the first reply came from such a senior person like you. Yes..I know that whatever Baba does to us will be right. Agree to your point that placing chits is okay, when we are indecisive. We were quite confused and indecisive few days back and hence decided to draw chits. But, somehow, in the meanwhile, we have got clarity and we feel we should wait for one more year. Now, with this clarity, we want to know, whether we should still proceed with the chits, as we have all along been thinking, or just take this clarity itself as Baba's way of telling us what to do and drop the chits idea?

If we draw chits...no matter what, we will definitely follow what Baba says with full faith. But, where we are confused is whether to draw chits or not, as we are no more confused in this matter. But we have been telling that we will take Baba's advise through chits, which ofcourse Baba knows and now if we don't do it, will it go wrong?

Sorry for repeated questions...since it's about my son, I am getting more anxious.

 

Thank you so much for the patient and detailed reply. When we are confused, the clarity others provide gives confidence and direction to move forward.

Truly, though I joined IL long back, I have been regular only the last couple of months and that too, the parayan during vijayadasami day and the ensuing 2013 parayan has made me feel very good. Feel like Baba drew me into it. We were in Mumbai till a year back. Still, we could never take our son to Shirdi, though it was just a overnight travel. But we used to visit the nearby Baba temple and my son used to enjoy it. Now, after moving to Kuwait, in September we had gone to India for vacation and we went to Shirdi from Chennai. We got very good Darshan...not much queue. We did darshan 3 times the same day...as though to make for the 3 years of my son. Incidentally, it also happened to be my birthday. After coming back, the parayan happened.

In the last 5 months or so, I have done the vrat once and read satcharita twice. My husband read it once and the vrat he is doing now is his second time. Suddenly, Baba seems to be drawing us towards him in all ways. As my Guru says, we need His grace, even to have His grace. This seems to be coming true in our case.

With all these happenings, am certain that everything will go right. But the fickle human mind also comes to play at times and tries to test our faith & patience. The satsang of people like you helps us to hold on at such times. Thankyou so much once again for the reply.

Looking forward to the 2013 year long parayan and let the year be filled with abundance for all of us.

With lots of love,
Subhashini

 

Dear Thank01 and Vidya..thankyou so much for the direction provided.