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Dust on the Soul

Discussion in 'Poetry' started by ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 4, 2010.

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  1. Mar 4, 2010 #1
    ShailRaghuvansh

    ShailRaghuvansh Silver IL'ite

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    The early morning rays of the sun
    splash my countenance
    and I am awakened
    out of my ignorant stupor.

    Scores of queries
    buried deep
    in the squalor of a laid back existence
    begin to torture my very soul.
    "What is writ in my destiny?"
    "Why can't I see beyond the fog of life?"

    Some incomplete goal
    lies awaiting my knock
    on its beckoning door
    and I am helpless
    oblivious of that window
    to hope and fulfillment.

    Cobwebs of ignorance,
    dust of arrogance
    lie untouched
    wrenching my sudden thoughts
    of reflection and realization.
    O God! I beseech You
    to show me the way.


    The original was composed by me in Hindi. Since I compose poetry mainly in English, I have translated it. The original is below.:

    Aatma kee dhool

    Subhah hotei hee
    jab surya kee kirne
    mukh par kheilteen hain,
    eeshwar ko yaad
    kartee hoon mein.

    Hei parmaatma,
    merei naseeb mein
    kya likha hai?
    kyoon sab adhoora
    lagta hai?
    Kuchch karna hai,
    yeh gyaat hai
    lekin woh hai kya
    ye malloom nahin.

    He Maa
    Raastaa dikha tu,
    meree aatma
    par jo dhool bikhra hai
    use mita tu.

    Mera pranam
    teree charnon mein.


    Hope you like it dear friends. Would love to hear from you!

    See you.
    :wave
    Shail
     
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 4, 2010
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 4, 2010
    #1
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  2. Mar 6, 2010 #2
    iyerviji

    iyerviji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Shail

    Good poem. God will show you the way and you will reach great heights in life. All the best always

    love
    viji
     
    iyerviji, Mar 6, 2010
    iyerviji, Mar 6, 2010
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  3. Mar 6, 2010 #3
    Padmini

    Padmini IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear shali,
    Through this poem, my feeling is you have beautifully brought the true essence of life.Through this poem you want to convey the salvation of soul.    What is the purpose of life? It is to go back to our essence, to our original true state. It is not our authentic condition to stay in a body. Our Truth is to identify with our soul. And the soul wants to return to unity with God, to merge into God. This unified state with God is our Truth and the body represents only the means that can help us in our return journey. This is healing - removing karma in order to become divine again, in other words to merge into God.
    Cobwebs of ignorance,
    dust of arrogance
    lie untouched
    wrenching my sudden thoughts These lines show the " karmic effect on our soul" Am I right ? Only with the help of the Omnipresent". A nice poem penned in an artistic way.
    with love
    pad
     
    Padmini, Mar 6, 2010
    Padmini, Mar 6, 2010
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  4. Mar 6, 2010 #4
    ShailRaghuvansh

    ShailRaghuvansh Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Viji,

    Thanks very much. It always helps when people understand.

    See you soon.:)
    Shail
     
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 6, 2010
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 6, 2010
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  5. Mar 6, 2010 #5
    ShailRaghuvansh

    ShailRaghuvansh Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Padmini,

    So very nice to see your comment. Yes indeed, it is the soul's desire to get rid of the karma of life and unite with the creator, the divine.

    I know it is not easy, sometimes impossible due to the karmic effects that we have to go through in life. But again, as long as there is a desire there is hope and there is the initiative to change, to reform, to connect with the Power above.

    Thank you Padmini.
    Regards,
    Shail
     
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 6, 2010
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 6, 2010
    #5
  6. Mar 6, 2010 #6
    Padmasrinivas

    Padmasrinivas Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Shail,

    A beautiful poetic expression of the fact that you (all of us, actually) are trying to pierce the veil of Maya or Illusion in this world and reach for the Reality... the Supreme Consciousness...

    Enjoyed reading it as it touched a chord in my heart!

    Love,
    Padma


     
    Padmasrinivas, Mar 6, 2010
    Padmasrinivas, Mar 6, 2010
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  7. Mar 6, 2010 #7
    ShailRaghuvansh

    ShailRaghuvansh Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Padma,

    It feels go to know that somewhere my poetry has touched you within.

    It is indeed a great encouragement to any poet when the reader connects and responds with the emotions expression in her poem.

    See you soon.:)
    Shail
     
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 6, 2010
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 6, 2010
    #7
  8. Mar 6, 2010 #8
    Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    My dear Shail

    It is far easier to write a FB to a prose but a deep thought expressed in a verse, it blows our mind away! Here you have touched upon a heart-wrenching aspect of human existence that of the Unknown that awaits us. The metaphorical use of the Sun in clearing the mists of ignorance is commendable. But the clearing of the mists of ignorance brings a fresh turmoil to an already tortured soul. ‘What lies in store for me?’ is a question that looms large before us when the clearing mist opens to us a vision of our future which is as mysterious as the Wilderness of Paran. Followers of the Old Testament would know that the Israelites wandered for forty years here without going into the Promised Land and perished. Only the devout and the faithful like Joshua and Caleb negotiated this wilderness successfully and entered the Promised Land.

    What lies ahead should be of no concern or worry to those who put their Faith in Him. You have brought this out beautifully in your concluding line. Cobwebs of ignorance and dust of arrogance can never be a permanent veil that can obstruct our view of what lies ahead if we clean it up with the Thought of the Divine.

    A lovely poem Shail. It tends to make us truly reflective of the life we have led thus far. It gives us a hope of brighter future.
    Sri
     
    Cheeniya, Mar 6, 2010
    Cheeniya, Mar 6, 2010
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  9. Mar 6, 2010 #9
    ShailRaghuvansh

    ShailRaghuvansh Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Sriniji,

    I have begun to like your detailed responses as it shows that you took the trouble to go in depth and understand my poem.

    Sometimes, there are issues that can be tackled, dealt with and can be expressed plainly in prose but with issues pertaining to the Lord, about our very own arrogance and ignorance, I find poetry as the best way to express myself.

    Thank you for your appreciation.:)
    Regards,
    Shail
     
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 6, 2010
    ShailRaghuvansh, Mar 6, 2010
    #9
  10. Mar 6, 2010 #10
    Tubelight

    Tubelight Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Shail
    A lovely poem. So true that poetry lends itself better for expressions so deepfelt and evanescent in nature.

    The darkness of Ignorance is such that, most of the time we don't even realise that we are in darkness or covered in dust. That realisation itself is a first step towards finding a means to shake it off and clear the cobwebs. The realisation also brings in despair for a faster remedial measure, and your poem reflects that despair so well.

    He who seeks will find.

    Best wishes.
     
    Tubelight, Mar 6, 2010
    Tubelight, Mar 6, 2010
    #10
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