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Daughter...

Discussion in 'Parents & Siblings' started by incarnation, Oct 4, 2010.

  1. iswaryadevi

    iswaryadevi Platinum IL'ite

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    I am the only child for my parents...Though I am a single now, I can understand how you are feeling...I have never been away from my parents...Do not know how I will handle it...hmm...
     
  2. Sriniketan

    Sriniketan IL Hall of Fame

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    Your thinking is correct, Incarnation.
    As Nithya, Kamalji pointed out, we have the right to change things na.
    As 'make or mar' is in women's hands.
    Let us make good changes wherever we go.

    sriniketan
     
  3. incarnation

    incarnation Silver IL'ite

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    Ice , I am sure you will be able to handle.
     
  4. incarnation

    incarnation Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Sriniketan , Hope things changes soon,

    -inc
     
  5. Ramavyasarajan

    Ramavyasarajan Silver IL'ite

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    Hi incarnation,

    It is a curse to be a daughter of course. In your case you are at far of place. But myself though lived in a short distance my parents never came and stayed with me. Now my father is no more. My mother will be comfortable only to live with her eldest son even though she is not treated well by her daughter in law. She will feel like sitting over a thorn whenever she comes to my house even for a shortest visit. In fact my husband too will not say anything but she welcomes my mother's stay with us. What to do. We ourselves have developed such a custom.

    Ramavyasarajan
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2010
  6. smileAlways

    smileAlways Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Inc,

    I am feeling sorry after reading your post.
    Everyone in India started saying(for the name sake) "girls and boys are the same", long before.But its sad that it is just limited to words. I don't have any hope to see the change in future(for the next 40 -50 yrs) myself, as there is no change in people's mentality. Even girl's people are thinking they are inferior to men's side.
     
    Last edited: Oct 7, 2010
  7. incarnation

    incarnation Silver IL'ite

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    Ramya / smiley

    we are getting used to these things...
    if we dont like we change just some , but will get used to it

    -inc
     
  8. lakshmi1945

    lakshmi1945 Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Inc
    Going through your post I was very saddened. I too an only daughter with two brothers was the apple of my dad's eyes. Yet my dad always said"I must die in my sn's house only." He would come to my house and stay for a few days. Then he would say,"Has your brother called? When will he come and get me?" I used to be too mad at this. He would then pacify me. Since my husband is a doctor,everytime he or my mother was ill,we all(including my brothers) relied on my husband's judgement. The moment he was better he would want to go back to his son's house. When I asked him if he did not have faith in me to take care of him,he would say," You are always pressurised with work, I don't want to put on more pressure on you." He had his wish because he passed away in his son's house. I was at his bed side.
    I wanted to go to the crematorium but my husband said that I would not be able to take it. Probably that is a reason daughters are not allowed to the crematorium.
    Well we too have a daughter and two sons. Our daughter and son-in-law are very fair. As she lives in the US we see her only once a year but she spends equal time with us. We spend equal time in the US with both our son and daughter's family. Luckily her in-laws are very nice .
    By the way though my own in-laws were very old fashioned in many of their ideas,they never discouraged my parents visiting me or they us.
    Lakshmi
     
  9. incarnation

    incarnation Silver IL'ite

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    Maam lakshmi1945,

    I know , my feelings have been passed to many..

    And I like that you have taken care of your daughters feelings...
    :thumbsup
     
  10. padma777

    padma777 Senior IL'ite

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    Hello incarnation,
    I am the only daughter of my parents and unmarried. I have none in this world except my parents who can accept me unconditionally. I can understand the feelings which u have for your father. Really it touched me immensely that i sat quitely for some time not knowing what to write. But I will write of course. Somewhere I have heard that " A DAUGHTER IS FOR THE WHOLE LIFE AND A SON IS TILL HE ACQUIRES A WIFE". In spite of that people are obsessed for a son and not for a daughter--very strange! Wishing for your father's long long life with his grand children and great grand children.........

    good bye! :)
     
    1 person likes this.

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