Confused

Hi,

I have been pondering over a decision for the past couple months and thought will probably take some views from you guys as that might help me ...

I have a son who is around 9 months old and we are relocating back to India, my husband will be looking for a job there and until he finds one and settles down I would be the only breadwinner in the household. Ours is a Love marriage and his parents have no relation with us for the past 4yrs and my parents are no more so we have no support at all.

Financially we are pretty Ok and can give our son the best of everything. After a lot of thought my husband and I decided to have only one child as we want him to have the best (also I had gestational diabetes and have a lot of back trouble post C-section).
Physically I get tired in the end of the day after work, taking care of my baby but again i keep thinking of how my child will grow up without a sibling ???

I always fear if something happens during the second pregnancy and i'm unable to go back to work my entire family will be in trouble. Is it worth taking that risk ???

Or is it better to see where we stand after 3yrs or so and go for adoption?? will an adopted child be as close to my son as a biological one ?

Would appreciate your thoughts and advice......

Hi,

See we can give you suggestions.

After all the whole decision will be yours.

You better know your family.

I think nowadays people are very much happy having a single kid.So go ahead and take care of your kid.No need to go for second one as such you have so many problems.

Dear angfish,

Very nice to see your liking for adoption.If you can really afford , please go for that.
Certainly your son will accept the new entrant, so don't worry about that.As you don't have relatives, you will not face any problem.

Originally Posted by Angfish

Hi,

I have been pondering over a decision for the past couple months and thought will probably take some views from you guys as that might help me ...

I have a son who is around 9 months old and we are relocating back to India, my husband will be looking for a job there and until he finds one and settles down I would be the only breadwinner in the household. Ours is a Love marriage and his parents have no relation with us for the past 4yrs and my parents are no more so we have no support at all.

Financially we are pretty Ok and can give our son the best of everything. After a lot of thought my husband and I decided to have only one child as we want him to have the best (also I had gestational diabetes and have a lot of back trouble post C-section).
Physically I get tired in the end of the day after work, taking care of my baby but again i keep thinking of how my child will grow up without a sibling ???

I always fear if something happens during the second pregnancy and i'm unable to go back to work my entire family will be in trouble. Is it worth taking that risk ???

Or is it better to see where we stand after 3yrs or so and go for adoption?? will an adopted child be as close to my son as a biological one ?

Would appreciate your thoughts and advice......

Hi,

First u decide what u want and based on that take the decision.

As u said that u are facing problems post c section, its better to avoid going in for the second one as of now. Without health there is no wealth. Adoption is not as easy as u think. U need to go in for lots of legal formalities and moreover whatever ups and downs in life u need should not blame the little one for adopting him / her. U and your husband needs to be mentally prepared to treat the adopted as your own.

First continue with your current job, let your husband settle down and then u can decide about having the second one or to go for adoption...

But before deciding anything think twice and the pros and cons...All the best.

Thank you all for your replies .....

Your baby is only 9 mnths old,what is the urgency now to think about a second child? You can definitely afford to wait for some time.In the meantime,your husband might find a good job,so that will get resolved.
Coming to GD,well ,I had that too for both my pregnancies along with high blood pressure.Both my deliveries were normal though they happened at 36 and 38 weeks respectively.During my first pregnancy I was on insulin for GD but during my second pregnancy,I controlled my sugar just thru' diet alone with no insulin or anything.So,it is possible to control sugar,don't worry.
Wait for sometime,think thru' your options and then take a wise decision.Good luck!!