After 35 years and turning from age 25 to 60 is India still your home country?

Orginally posted by Sunitha

---Quote (Originally by sunitha)---
You know Nazneen,you hit the nail on the head here.
Even today,if you are in the USA and lets say,you are not too glued on to the internet and depend on TV for all news and lets say you do not have international channels,here in America,you get news related to America only. The farthest that the new channels go to cover any world news is Europe(specifically UK),sometimes China because US is so dependent on China for all its products and ofcourse Iraq,because,obviously the US is fighting a war there. To the Americans,the world consists of only these nations.

So,if you are an Indian here in such a state,obviously,you loose all touch with your motherland because you don't get to know anything happening there unless you yourself are particularly interested in knowing the same.So as you said,I think that is one of the main reasons that people who moved here long back have to some extent,become Americans themselves.
---End Quote---

Originally posted by Shobana

---Quote (Originally by Shobanag)---
I am saddened by your assumption that because I have chosen to accept
my life here makes me love my country any less. I am as much an Indian
as the next person. How an individual adjusts to a new environment is
totally up to that person - I am a very strong person and not wowed by
everything I see here - believe me, I have seen a lot - from living in a
very small basement apartment when we first came here. Life was not
easy or rosy for that matter - I would have liked nothing better to go
back at that time. But I told myself that this is my life now and I am
going to make the best of it. All my experiences that I have had here
have only made me love my country and everything about India more
everyday. I also love a lot of things about this country too - the opportunties
that have come my way, the friends that I have made, the family that I
have today. I will not take anything back for all the experiences that
I have had. I am an Indian. A big part of my adult life is here and my
married life is here, my family is here - so if that makes me
American, so be it.
---End Quote---

Originally posted by Blondie


Very well said Shobha....my exact feelings.

Face the reality of today and make the best of it.

And let me add all my extended family from my husband's side except
his parents are here in the US and from mother's side are in india some
in big cities and some in big districts and some in rural villages all
of whom I visit very frequently (3 times in 06). So I am in touch with
the latest developments that are going on in India both good and bad.
Because of that my chest doesn't swell with pride nor my head hangs in
shame when it comes to india or any other country including US. Being a
pragmatist i take everything in my stride(analyse things to their
death )

Nazneen, racism is not the sole property of americans. It was your
goodfortune that you didn't encounter racism(casteism) in india. what can
you say to your child if he/she wasn't allowed to enter some houses of
his/her friends in india?? Here I am talking from personal experience
from the time when during our india visit when my son was <7 years old
and wanted to go to the friends house who always come over to our house
but he couldn't go because their parents were afraid that they will get
into trouble. (actually i was more scared that i will get in trouble
with my MIL at that time ). I loved Tabu's portrayal of a
wife/mother in a foreign land. Don't go too over the board . Just be sincere and
your natural self in all your interactions, you are doing everything
right.

Originally posted by Blondie

Sunitha, like the saying that goes 'like birds flock together' I know a lot of people who are like me. All of my desi friends who i see physically (not virtually ) are active participants /volunteers at AID, USINPAC, ASHA, you name it , they are in it. You just don't get to see them in this site. Another favorite site of mine is another subcontinent forums -> society and culture (http://www.anothersubcontinent.com/forums/index.php?showforum=37)

just visit that and you WILL see the difference. I am sure you will find your soul 'blogmate' there, (did i just invent another word?? )

I believe in actions more than in words ( my volunteer work) and that has what made me ambivalent about 'India is developed' notion that i sensed here.

The pull of the land where your ancestors rest in peace and where all your dear ones are is very strong and it is only there that your heart will be at peace. Like Sathya said.(one of my favorite songs)
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Originally posted by Sunitha

---Quote (Originally by sunitha)---
The question here is,Blondie and Shoba,have many people are like you?Shoba,I don't intend to hurt your feelings at all here.From your writings itself,I can feel your love for your motherland.

OK, so does it not come back again to what I said? Only if you are interested in keeping touch with your motherland,you will do it. Since you both wanted to have that touch,you have done it,but how any people here are like that? Unfortunately,I don't get to see many people and that is why my opinions have changed to this extent in these last 3 yrs here.
---End Quote

Originally posted by Abha

---Quote (Originally by Abha)---
Hey

What Sunitha said is absolutely right... there is a large amount of Indians who dont care about India and neither do they check whats happening there and have forgotten the basic Indianness and have become totally and purely Videshi...

But seriously I pity those people, cos one thing is for sure, they would end being, or belonging to nowhere... that why they are called confused desis cos their children ask them, we stay in US, we study here, then why do we still have to be conservative when it comes to dating and premarital sex... and when such questions arise parents themselves would have fewer words to say...

And I tell you Sunitha, that is exactly the same reason, why people havent come forward and posted in this thread, cos they have nothing to say, or they themselves are confused about their status and cultural background.

~Abha
---End Quote---

Originally posted by Blondie

Abha ABCD can stand for america bound CONFIDENT desi's too. It is just a matter of how you handle the situations. The youth here are fully aware of all the jokes that FOB's make about them (FOB= fresh off the boat). Just visit any college campus an you will know what i mean.
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Originally posted by Kamla

Dear friends,

I read Naazneen's post sometime back, I think only two members had written in. I
thought there was a loud call for me to take part in this thread. I did not. A
Big Huge Sorry!
The reason is the lack of time. Right now, my participation in IL is very
limited. I attend my usual 'staple' threads and have taken care not to get too
involved in other threads due to lack of time, not lack of interest. IL has
grown by leaps and bounds. But not my spare time
I made time today to read this thread and feel really proud about my Indian
sisters (and one brother!!) here! Everyone one of you are really lovely and
sincere in your thoughts. I admire the love Naazneen, Abha and Sunitha and
Ragini have for India, a blind and all consuming love. I see the same love in
Blondie, Shoba, Nivedi and TDU too and also in me!
Like Nivedi put it so well, you can take an Indian out of India, but cannot take
India out of an Indian. We have our earth within us, part of the five elements
that we are made of.
I must add a special word for the beautiful posts of Blondie. We can all be
really proud of our India being represented abroad by such a sincere Indian who
perhaps is an Amercian too now. And so what...she is one of those who is
planting an Indian flag proudly on the American soil with every right.
Like it or not, this is the face of the modern earth. It is a global village. We
cannot change it. If we women have to live outside our country, we may as well
do it with a smile, not with a moping face.
As for me, I have been out of India for 37 very long years. Yes, I feel lost in
my own India these days. But do I love India any less than any of you? No. Add
to it that I am not even an American. I am your proverbial Rolling Stone having
lived in different countries for different lengths of time. I would not have
been much help to my family if I had put on a long face while coping to live in
foreign soils. I trudged forth armed with my international editions of Hindus,
Savvys, Filmfares and what nots, with MSSubbalakshmi chanting her suprabathams
and slokas and VCR or DVD playing anything that I could grab from my country. At
the same time, I lapped up all the new venues that were open to me and absorbed
what suited my interests and taste and avoided other things that was not
palatable to me.
And I am here, quite an active member in this mostly Indian forum absorbing
greedily the spiritual, religious, social and culinary feast and whatever
else
Point to note is Not to decry one or the other country. We must realize that
there is good and bad everywhere on this earth. We just have to learn to be
discerning, not decrying.
As a kid, we simply looove and adore our parents, then we love our husband
blindly, later it is our kids and for me, it is my grandkids now. But do I love
any one of my above family more or less just because I love so many.......I
don't think so Same with the countries, your own or adopted. Hope
that says all.

L, Kamla
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Originally posted by Kamla


Dear Blondie,

I was impressed with all your words and expressions about living and settling abroad. You seem to have managed to live an ideal NRI's life.
Excepting for the one remark for which you have promptly apologized, your explanation about how an NRI feels about settling abroad was amazing.
Shoba too has given a very balanced write up about her views.
These posts will help many who venture out of India in their search for future aspirations and livelihood.
Ofcourse, these are my personal thoughts about your posts.

L, Kamla

Originally posted by Shobana

I am so glad to read your post Kamla - I have been here a long time too
(not as long as you) but I know that with my family here, this is
probably where I will spend the rest of my life, but never forgetting where
I come from. One thing I do notice whenever we visit India - that I
am a lot more conservative that women my age there - may be because I am
holding on to things from my early life there - the MTV culture has
slowly but surely creeped in and people there are changing - that to me
is a big change! Did you feel that way??

I totally agree what you said - I have accepted my life here and come
to love a lot of things about it but never forgetting where I came from.
My daughter was born here and is growing up here - can I expect her
to be like me? No way - she is her own individual and it would be wrong
on my part to expect her to be like me. I have taught her all that I
know - to what extent she will accept it is up to her. But she is an
ABCD - the C stands for Confident!

Shobana