Demanding In-Laws and how to make my husband understand?

Hi Everybody,

I have been married for 3 yrs and my husband is very good to me. My in laws are the worst of their kind and they never let any chance go to harrass me or my parents family. Anyways there's is a diff story...
My question is that my in laws are very demanding, they need money gifts on every single occasion..birthdays, anniversarys, all festivals and occasions like first salary, promotion anything...just name it and they expect a solitaire each for them and for their daughters...I have been giving them at every possible occasion and the best that i can give to an extent that we are not able to buy a house because we always have credit card bills pending...My in laws are going to visit my sis in law who is in Netherlands and my husband bought xpensive gifts for my sis in law her daughters and sis in law's hubby..i chose with him and showed enthu..
Now i wanted to mail my sis in law that i am sending her some gifts hope she likes them then my husband went mad...he says no need to mail her mummy will give it to her herself..
what is the use, my mil is so wicked, she will give her the gifts saying that she had bought it or zyada se zyada she will say that my husband gave it for her..
she wont tell that i bought them from my salary...
my husband is extremely non understanding regarding this..he can go to any extent to fulfill the idiotic demands of his crafty mother..I have learnt it through time that how she plays around with her tricks to disparage me..
please help me...how do i make my husband understand all this..he becomes angry when i try to tell him even though I am extremely polite in telling..

:((

Anu

hi Anu....

i have seen this problem specially in our north indian families. We too have gone through same phase...but my husband understood when our credit cards reached their limit and we were not at all able to save even a thousand rupees by the end of the month...first i tried to make my husband understand by telling him but very soon i realized he will understand only when he experience this, he have to feel himself. I kept quite for a long time but really once we needed money then his father just denied saying he want to keep for old age and for his daughter...my father in law earned a good amount of money abroad but i never saw him spending a single coin for me or my husband...not even on festival. I think you and husband make a budget...involve your husband totally in budget making..in that only you keep some amout separate for all such gifting purpose....he himself will understand how much he need to spend....you can't stop gifting at once ..it will make your in laws unhappy and they may create problem for you...be tactful...in our case my husband saw his parents have money to gift everyone that too expensive gifts including gold and silk but for us even in need he can't share a thousand rupees forget about gold or gift...as sson my husband started earning he took care of his whole family house rent, groceries,medical bills at least for ten years....but in return we got bad name...really it hurts... So you be careful at least now in stead of getting tensed at last be careful now itself...gifting is not bad but it should be limited..