Is my DH different or Does anybody else experience this

I and DH had a love marriage and I knew him for a couple of years before we were married.I have given him a lot of surprises and gifts before we were married.And I knew he was not into giving gifts. I was ok with that. Haven't expected any gifts from him before we were married.Now we are married for 4 years and have a kid. I got one gift from him for my first anniversary(15 days later) after many of IL family/friends asked in front of him what he had got for me for our first anniversary.
Kind of got used to that these days never expect anything(gifts) from him though I used to feel bad about it in the first couple years of marriage when people(my SIL and cousins) ask me as to what I got from my hubby. Anyways I got out of that, thinking I knew he is not big into giving gifts so how can I expect that now.
But recently we had gone to his sisters wedding. And he din't miss a chance to gift the bride or groom. He did give them gifts for the reception, wedding, first night, honey moon everything, even when we first invited them for dinner. That made me feel bad. Not because he gave gifts to his sister ( I am perfectly fine with that). But why not me.
MY sister gifts us something for every occasion, my husband makes sure we do the same.So when he does that to everybody why not me. And also to mention, I still give him expensive gifts for most occasions and he returns it back if he could.I would have got him the electronic gadget he was always eyeing upon. But he would return that and get something different the next model or a previous model or even the same after a few months. These days I feel I should only gift him keepsakes or things e can't return. It makes me feel really bad as I have expereienced this many times now.
Otherwise I get a lot of "I love you"s and also a lot of silent treatments.
I wanted to know if anybody else have experienced any of this behaviour from your DH.

Dear Vibrant, Please don't worry. My husband doesn't even remember birthdays,wedding days etc. leave alone giving presents. Initially I used to give him gifts and slowly understood he neither appreciated nor reciprocated this gesture. Now I completely stopped giving him gifts. He also forgets the birthdays of others in his family. So I started reminding him about important dates for the members of his family and sending gifts to them. Take it this way... Probably he thinks 'he is you and you are him' and gifts don't matter! He loves you and you love him and that's the greatest gift you can give to each other. These are trivial matters in life....
Monifa

Dear,

It is completely normal for a husband to forget birthdays,Anniversary or important dates..If you look around, you will find many such incidences.
Women have this God's gift to care for their people,make others feel special.Men cannot express their feelings through materialistic means such as gifts or celebrations on anniversary's etc.If your Husband doesnot give you gifts or remembers d dates,just remind him of the day in most humorous gesture...Tease him for not remembering ..let it go off...I know its hard to accept that he is not pampering you on special days..but deary...we cannot force on them..Right ? They know women loves surprises..but cannot act on that..If he doesnot like the gift ...stop gifting him,whats the use ?? ( You know what happened with me in the 1st yr of Marriage,My DH
forgot my Birthday,then he told wrong date for this parents Marriage Anniversary...and i actually called my MIL to wish,she politely corrected me..that was her goodness but imagine my plight..He got a good scolding from MIL afterthat...Now,it my task to remind him for all the dates including our own. )
And he giving gifts to his Sis ..then that is Socialization...he might be doing that as a duty.Most men are like that !!

In end, HE loves you,that matters the most.

What ur DH gifted to sister would have been a polite demand by his mom to do sufficient for his sis on this day to show to her ILs that his bro cares.
Does he regularly gift others and not you? If not unless explicitly forced then he falls into a regular male category.

Upto 2 yrs of marr we used to happily exchange gifts of equal amount and then his parents educated him on not buying anything for me.. esp in gold etc... so he's stopped taking gifts from me too.
This directive came out of a series of events when my DH used to share all gift details to my SIL and then she used to end up in fights with her DH.. now that her DH is very well placed... he ends up buying diamond sets for her every now and then... however my MIL forgot to re-educate his son to resume our gifting sessions.

Dear Vibrant
my DH is the same... never gifts anything me for any occasion... only when he went to bangkok his friend was buying a gold chain for his wife so he bot one for me!!!.. but he is like that with all but his parents and my mom and brother!!
Initially during our courtship days i used to feel bad but now i ... its nothing so serious... he is very generous but not a good "gifter"
I never bother i just go and buy what i want after its from our money only!!
don't feel bad there are alot of wives who have the same problem..the best is to think how much you love each other and that is the biggest gift!!
K

Hi Vibrant,

My hubbyz also pretty much the same...the only difference being, he takes me wid him when he selects gifts for other people...also asks me if I want it...n if I say 'no', he assumes hez done with his duty...what I mean is, he thinks that by asking me itself counts as buying something for me...so the lesson learnt here is, never say no when he asks...I guess he wud stop offering once he learns my strategy...but not to forget, hez that kinda person who only buys stuff for his people n not for himself at all...his work demands him to be on telephonic meetings most of the time...recently his dad managed to suck the mobile charger with the vaccum cleaner...so his mobile stopped working. we had an age old spare mobile at home which is not v.comfortable to use n the sound clarity is also not great...ive been insisting him on getting a new mobile n he is firm that he wudnt...now how do I help him with this...im not the earning member here n I dont have access to buy expensive stuff for him...I did offer my mobile to him but he doesnt want to take mine also...if he cant help himself,who else can...

Your DH does not sound all that different. In my 10 years of married life I have received one surprise gift from DH (for our first wedding anniversary when we were apart). We both are just not the gift-giving kind of people (to each other). But we do carry gifts for relatives and other occasions.

For me, giving gifts or cards to each other looks like a formality and there is no need of that. If I need something or if he needs something we both just buy it. So maybe he is just not the gift-giving type...

I knew my husband from my collg days and he was working .
Sicne we had started , he used to send me big-gifts for every stupid reason...or stupid occasion ..like first day we met/first day i proposed..
how stupid i used to think.
i would tell him not to ...as my parents would find it out...He didnt even lsiten to send small-hideable gifts.
I also used to send him by saving moeny but not as frequent until i started earning.
Now ,after marriage ,4 yrs...he never gave even a flower ot me on anniversary or V -day( forget smaller days)
He gifts on bdays fearing i would cry out.
But he rarely once cared for karva chauth, or anniversary...
But me...even if i am travelling or outside or in india..i make sure i buy some small gift and keep it in the house for him.
Everytime i decide i wont buy for him except bday this time .as he doest but get emotional everyitme .
So much we talk on this that a husband if cant afford bigger thing should on and off gift small things like a flower . but no use.I have seen so many lucky women....These things just refreshens the relationships..

I think you should also talk to your husband that you should give smaller things that you can select.

Even my DH is like that he sometimes forgets his b'day...
I asked him many times why dont u gift me.. He simply say if u want anything let me know i will buy it for your.. I will tell him then it is not a gift...
I used to give him loads of gifts.. sometimes bit expensive also but he is not that interested in giving gifts not only to me for anyone...

But sometimes if he gets costly gifts from a friend he will ask me to remind him that in return we should give them a good gift.. At times i feel bad...
For valenties day / b'day he nevers gives gift - my friends sometime ask me what ur DH gave for this occasion i will feel bad those times...

Though sometimes it is acceptable sometimes i feel bad to the core...
May be i need some more maturity for those kind of things