did you ever asked this to your DH

hi
has anyone raised the question with your DH aftre marriage about whom he loves the most, whether his mom or you.or does he show by any signs or actions, that he loves you more than his mom...let me start first..i remember asking him this at the beginning of our marriage..and even after a long courtship, all he told me is that noone can ever replace his mom's love and position until she is alive...
whats your experience...

Originally Posted by ashwini999

hi
has anyone raised the question with your DH aftre marriage about whom he loves the most, whether his mom or you.or does he show by any signs or actions, that he loves you more than his mom...let me start first..i remember asking him this at the beginning of our marriage..and even after a long courtship, all he told me is that noone can ever replace his mom's love and position until she is alive...
whats your experience...

A mother is a mother; a wife is a wife. No man can pick and choose between the two, nor should we force him to make a choice. What will we answer if *WE* are asked who we love more? Our fathers or our husbands?

ashwini,
your husband is correct. nobody replace mothers love. i never ask this question in my 17years of marraige life. how can i ask him which eye do you like more?

Hi,
Prefereneces changes day to day.
My husband used to say intially that his first preference is his parents (Ofcourse his job too, he is workaholic) , then friends and then only I. But next year he said his parents then I and then his friends. Now he is telling "You and I are one and for us both parents are first preference" . When we get a child, he may change. Because for both of us, our child will become the first preference than anyone. This is quiet natural.

i asked my dh
and yes a lot of times but generalised question not like a comparission between his mom and me
i asked him in the world whom do you love the most
he said its me
and then he said when our kid comes to this world he will be the furst love
but i know he loves everyone equally
and like others said mom is mom and wife is wife both loves cant be same and cant be compared aas both are unique

I agree with Malyatha.

Originally Posted by ashwini999

hi
has anyone raised the question with your DH aftre marriage about whom he loves the most, whether his mom or you.or does he show by any signs or actions, that he loves you more than his mom...let me start first..i remember asking him this at the beginning of our marriage..and even after a long courtship, all he told me is that noone can ever replace his mom's love and position until she is alive...
whats your experience...

Never put a man in such a situation where he has to choose b/w you or his mom....remember his mom is theone who gave birth and raised him to X no. of years till the time you came into his life...

also everyones place is unique...mom is a mom and wife is a wife..how do you want to divide and share moms love and wifes' love?? its like asking...out of your 2 eyes..which eye do you love the most

Hi

it is very wrong to put a man in this kind of dilemma. It is not at all right. Mothers are mothers and wife will be a wife. this realisation will hit when one becomes a mother. No one can choose between mother and wife, both hold different places in a man's life.

He will certainly be attached to both in different ways. One thing we need to understand is that a man is always dependent on a women, be it mother, wife, daughter.

They wil only talk that they do not need women in their lives, but actually they do.

Rightly said Malyatha :)
I feel its not fair to ask my DH such a thing, though i've asked him whose cooking u like the most
He wud luv his mom as i luv my mom - no one can be replaced - simple :)

Dear Malyatha,

As usual, your response is

Ashwini,

I do not understand your question. Why would I ask my husband that? A mom is a mom and a wife is a wife. How could anyone equate them both? I would be pissed off if my husband asks me whether I love my dad or him more. No number games in totally different relationships.

On a totally different note, I think am going completely loony. The first question which popped in my mind after reading OP's post is how can you compare and say whose acting prowess is greater..Rajini or Kamal? Both of them excel in completely different genres. Someone please tell me am not going mad.