Valentines Day - Share the tender gestures you offer each other as a couple

Gauri03 · Feb 9, 2016

Love it or hate it, it's Valentine's Day this Sunday!

Are you a sucker for everything romantic and sappy? Do you have a Valentine's day tradition that you share with your significant other? Even if the clichés of the holiday -- dinner dates, teddy bears, flowers, chocolates and movies -- are not your style, let's use the occasion as an excuse to recount some of the precious moments you've shared with your beloved. Let's celebrate the love in our lives.

From grand romantic gestures, a la, Romeo on the balcony, to the little tender moments that help sweeten everyday life -- recall the one best thing that your beloved recently did for you, and/or something you did for them.

For those of you still waiting to find the one, what do you hope from your future Valentine?

Gauri03 · Feb 9, 2016

In keeping with the 'OP goes first tradition', here's mine. My husband and I believe that love must be nurtured and cultivated. Soul-mates are made, a little bit everyday, by making time, and by putting the other first. We do a lot of little things for each other without the expectation of receiving anything in return. For instance, every other Saturday, my husband takes my car, gets it washed, tops off the gas and leaves it in my spot. No words are exchanged. It is just done. I asked him once why he does it, and he said that he imagines me stranded on a highway without gas, losing my mind, and it terrifies him.

For my part, I gladly overlook his untidiness. He leaves a trail of socks, belt, jeans all over the room, wet towels on the bed, sweaty t-shirts stuffed in drawers! I used to fuss and complain, until I weighed it against all that he does for me. Now I have embraced my beloved hobo for who he is. His clothes get laundered and magically reappear in his closet. I doubt he ever wonders how they get there. A minor sacrifice for someone who is the best thing in my life.

As to Valentines day, we have ambiguous feelings. I don't detest the occasion as some do, but I don't buy into the commercial hoopla either. I treat it as another opportunity to make him feel loved and appreciated, and he does the same for me. I don't know how but we've ended up with a few special traditions for the day. For the past few years, he wakes up early, tells me he's going for a run, goes to the same florist, and buys me the most beautiful flowers. Every single year! And he wonders why I'm never surprised. He's no 007 but it's his predictability that is so sweet and comforting. Before kids, we'd cook together, cozy up on the couch and watch our favorite movies. These days we have a special family dinner with our two precious little Valentines!

Amica · Feb 9, 2016

My DH is self-appointed thekedar of sanskruti on Valentine's Day, birthday, Christmas and all other "Western" gift-giving occasions. On Diwali and all other Indian gift-giving occasions, he turns into a staunch proponent of the great melting pot way of life. :roll: :-D

Although, to be honest, pretty much every day with him is Valentine's day. I get random I <3 U's in the form of a red rose or pumpkin latte or something else just because. ♥♥♥♥♥

What do I do for Valentine's day? I follow Japanese tradition and give him Honmei-choco. Then I eat most of it myself.

Rihana · Feb 10, 2016

Hey almost missed this. Been thinking too much about that handsome trainer I also didn't hire gazillion years ago at a fitness place now closed down.. and that trainer now probably has a paunch, two brats, and a mortgage. : ) I digress.

We did touch on this topic at dinner past two days. The older one, in her style (maternal affection and pride has me envision Megyn Kelly sometimes), said, 'Not to imply that you were always so boring and busy with us... but, would you say there was romance.. like did you celebrate Valentine's day... before you came to abhor it and spoke with the teacher about the inappropriate cards kids were exchanging at school..'

I obliged her with a synopsis of some Valentine Days gone by. The heart-shaped See's candy in its deep-red box, that took me 3 weeks to finish eating, and I actually kept it on top of a katori placed in a plate surrounded by water to ward off ants. I am first asked what is See's candy : ) : ) Then, she turns to dad, and with the guilelessness of the young, bluntly says, 'You bought a heart-shaped candy?'

The emphasis on You. Spousal loyalty has me leaping to an unusual defense. "Yes, beta, we were romantic enough, thank you. Now, you can lower those incredible incredulous eyebrows!"

Am I still digressing? : )

The things we agree on, are the Valentine's of life. The knowing what the other likes, wants, and how he/she will react. That is the main thing. The gravy. Extras are there. There is a nod to the day, and what it symbolizes. Maybe flowers, or a dish I make. Though, now the kids are happy to shoo us out of the house, start asking from 4 PM when we are leaving.. a quiet dinner in a lesser known restaurant, less talk, my drinks and food arriving without me having to look at the menu, maybe a movie after.

Marriage, does have benefits.

Gauri03 · Feb 10, 2016

Rihana said: ↑

Marriage, does have benefits.
Click to expand...

Considering the number of times you say that, don't you think your conclusion should be emphatically positive! :biggrin2: Marriage, when it works, is fantastic! Boring old monogamous love can be quite blissful. Nandita ought to try it. :tongue

Hemamalini1985 · Feb 10, 2016

great,,, i am to happy to share... actually we are in joint family we cant express ourself on those special occassion times.... but v try to fullfill those on some other day....LOVE SHOULD BE TRUE BUT NOT BLIND

dimhere · Feb 10, 2016

More than the actual Valentine's Day, it is the week leading up to it, (Yes, THIS week! ) which is the best for us!

Somehow we are the kindest to each other during this time. A gentle nod to each other for just BEING there and KNOWING the other.
The word which comes to my mind is GRATEFUL. Grateful to destiny for our marriage, grateful to each other for doing (some) things without being asked.

On the actual V-day, it being a Sunday, we might just have a family meal at home, and shoo the kids out to their classes, and get some dessert together. And yes, we have done all the surprise diamond ring, diapered-baby dolls, teddy bears, cheesy cards, what not in the past. Can't believe I actually thought those were fun then!

harinideep · Feb 11, 2016

My husband does not believe in v day . but I love the decorations etc.
Last year I got rose for him and after one hour I found it near trash . so I decided that it would be my last v day gift .
I don't have much complains as he takes us out every weekend to some park or good sight seeing place in our city. Though he is very very busy during weekdays , he does laundry , vacuum cleaning , bathroom cleaning during weekends. I listen to all his office stories and advise him to relax. Every day small guestures should lead to love I feel.
Anyways , I cannot forget a v day , I guess - 2008 . we were lovers at that time . as usual he got busy and did not come to meet me and I felt little sad. So I called one of my friends and we planned to go main land China. We dressed up in skirts and happily went there. We did not know it was candle light dinner . all the couple's who had come there were giving very odd looks after seeing 2 girls dressed up and celebrating v day in candle light dinner. But we both had great time. Laughed so much and it was the best v day for me.

1Sandhya · Feb 11, 2016

tender gestures aa? Hmm...let's see.

When we were dating and in initial years he would bring me chocolates for V day.

Fast forward, a couple of decades, around this time of year, he goes through the house with a fine tooth comb and ruthlessly throws all the hidden stashes of chocolates away... because he is horrified with the amount of chocolate I eat/stash away and is convinced I am going to get diabetes any day now... Guess this is how love changes its colors through the decades :rotfl