Is this right?

@lilyrose:
Borrow (in your case, take) some money from your husband and try not returning the money to him. Check his reaction.

Every relationship is different. Some husbands and wives voice out to each other on how money should be handled between them and with families. Some have an unsaid expectation/understanding. If this is been bothering you a lot and if you don't want to borrow money from your husband, then just talk to him directly. (Be open to him arguing/feeling hurt or understanding what you are saying easily)

 

Good question LilRose. . here are my 2 cents.
I think, it all depends on the understanding between the couple.
I personally feel that money should not matter. as far as both think that they are one family and each and every penny spent is for family sake. they should have that trust on each other.

in my case, my husband never trust me in money matters. so, I make sure I give some amount for house hold maintenance stuff and keep the rest with me as my savings. but again I am okay to share everything as far as he trust me.

Also, I heard from one of my frnd that his spouse is very greedy and is never willing to share her salary .. so he looks out to friends when there is any financial need.

 

First of all I don't understand what is the this borrowing and lending business all about means is this a marriage or a bank ? Are you both husband and wife or ...bank and client...I guess in marriage everything is not *my* its *our* is it only applicable for men and not women ..whatever that might be I think this is more of a bank and less of a marriage..

P.S:- what's the interest rate of the bank

 

@lilyrose - In my opinion this depends on the mutual understanding between the couple. Your husband might have never given a thought about his money or your money. Its just money, which we spend for both of us.

One suggestion would be to create a joint account and pool in your money together there. so that in case of emergency expenses you both will have enough with you.

 

Lol
Does this goes Vice versa too?? If you borrow(I will never use word borrow in my case) money from your DH...are you returning the money back

Come on....couple earns to help eachother , to support and share the financial responsibilities.

I earn less than by DH. he earns 4 times more than what I earn..but he has lot of financial responsibilities....no doubt he never had to take money that I earn but like if his wallet has shortage of cash or we are going somewhere out and he realized his wallet is lighter...He takes money from me...and offcourse I never expect him to return...will feel bad if he does so...Only thing that both me and he follows is..
For what ever money we get from elders for occassions.....we keep it aside in a pouch and if in emergency we fetch money from that pouch we make it a point to put it back in the pouch...

You are being nice to your hubby not to any relative/ stranger / Sibling / Friend....

Continue being same...dont let money break the bonding you share.

 

In my opinion, Ideal condition is that there is no barrier between husband and wife.

OP's state is closer to ideal condition as she never bothered / never felt that it is
''her money''. I think her DH also thinks in the same manner and use her money
for his expenditures without any inhibition. If it happen vice versa too, then I would say you are ideal couple at least in money matters. Be proud of it.

My advise is not to spoil your thoughts by reading all these threads...This is a different world..