Can traditional role of a wife be expected from a working woman? Is it justified?

While I agree with what you are saying ! I also think that the opposite is not true! If a woman is not working than adherence to orthodox tradition is not a given thing !! Because you dont work, you do all the housework and wear saree all day long !! No I dont think that is right! Duty is important (if husband works I take care of household duties because I want to, its my contribution) but adherence to tradition is my on personal belief ! If I want to il do it, if I dont want to, nobody shud force me to do it !!

 

I very strongly believe that either the man earns and the woman takes care of household affairs, or BOTH earn and BOTH share household chores EQUALLY.

But most men these days want to have their cake and eat it too.

Most matrimonial profiles will read....... looking for a modern career oriented girl with traditional values.

So basically a girl who brings home a fat pay check AND one who also bears him children, kills herself doing all the household chores alone all by herself, and who also starves herself some days of the year,fasting for his long life!!

Ha Ha Ha

Hats off to such men!!

 

[Emphasis added]

It is unclear what the connection between traditional behavior / orthodox tradition & a woman who works is. What exactly are traditional behavior & role play according to you?

 

(SPlit post for readability)

A marriage is a two-person partnership where each member of the team should pull his/her own weight to contribute to the team's success (think of it as the two engines on an aircraft; one might be sufficient for flight but won't produce the same performance as two engines running simultaneously).

With all the advances in household appliances, availability of household cleaning / maintenance services, maintaining a modern household in an urban setting is far easier than during our grandmothers' times (which is where the "traditional" reference probably comes from).
Add to this, the advances in medicine & natal care and the fewer number of children women have, I'd say the tasks of a modern-day housewife are certainly easier & less time-consuming than that of my grandma (who had three children, which relative to her times was not a big number). I should know as I maintain my own home by myself
in better condition than my mom.gigglingsmiley Even though, I'm more a fan of eating yumsmiley than cooking, I can get the job done quite well thanks to all the tools & resources available. Even quality recipes are available if you know where to look.

Today, it's certainly smart for a woman to work at least part-time and help ease some pressure off the husband & also add to the household income (given job certainty has decreased while work pressures have increased).
Expecting contribution from a wife isn't non-traditional.

Traditional expectations still apply (for instance):

i. husband being the primary earner, should earn more & contribute when the wife is pregnant etc. (source real life)
ii. protect family even at risk to his own well-being (source: natural instinctive behavior) & haven't seen too many examples of wives endangering themselves to save the husband... even in the recent J&K floods, women were rescued before men & even children!

It seems like you don't realize that the vast majority of the most dangerous, difficult & dirty / unpleasant jobs to maintain a civilized society are performed predominantly by men in a traditional society.

Just compare workforce participation vs workplace fatalities / casualties (even in the West).
As they begin receiving this kind of recognition (being taken for granted), men will shun these roles & obligations (nobody does things for nothing).
Perhaps, then better sense will prevail. Won't be too hopeful though.

 

@GG...what you have said is very true !!

But in India, as Op has stated, this happens, she is talking about reality ! Inlaws n husband have this thought process, if the wife isnt an earning member she is suppose to take care of the house and the husband lends no hand! Its very common ! There are a fourtunate few where the husband helps out but a lot is taken forganted if you are not working ! Since it is an expectation that a wife if is non-working shud comply to all the traditional roles(cooking,cleaning, washing, maintaining home, maintain customs etc and what not, sometimes she is not even given a maid to help out cz is is not working and has all the time in the world to take care of the home, it happens GG), therefore Op asks the question that if the wife is an earning member she shud not be expected to do all this entirely all by herself. And there are cases where the women are working and come back home and manage the entire household cz the setup is such ! How fair is that ! Does she not have a life ! What you have said GG is the humane and right way to think! But how many actually comply !! Its just sad !

 

Such men are parasites and curse . Women should avoid such creepos and psychos..... it i sbetter to be single and happy than being married and miserable to such dumb men.

 

Totally agree with you Panda, but sometimes girls realise this after marriage! These guys never show their true character before marriage !