Married life is not on track

A threat to divorce him may jolt him to action to remedy the situation. But honestly, after divorce what?

 

I agree with nandita... I feel a threat to divorce may make things a little smooth. If he loves you genuinely, he may pay heed to your advances and intimacy may return. But all these comes with a supposition " May".. hope my words ring true..
All the best

 

Yes. A threat to divorce and temporary separation might jolt him back into action.

Tell him him kindly and politely that you have really tried to make sense of his lack of sex drive and have tried to bear with it but it has become impossible for you to be happy. Since he does not want to take the effort, you think it is better that you part ways for the sake of your sanity. Tell him you need some time away from him so that both of you can think what to do next.

In the meanwhile you need to get back to india and find yourself a job. (And stick to it for at least two years so that it counts on your CV) Be kind and polite to him though. Be ready to talk to him over the phone if he makes an effort. If he doesn't, I suggest that you do go ahead with a divorce due to mutual incompatibility. Focus on your career/ study further. It may seem bleak, however with some counselling plus family and friends rallying around, things will certainly look up. Xx

 

Dear,

I personally believe in maintaining relationships and not breaking them.. but in your case, I believe it is best to do what your heart says.. I mean your DH is hell adamant he wont improve then why you have to spoil rest of your life for a self-centered guy like him. Successful marriages require adjustments from both end.. if only one person has to compromise, it becomes more of a mental torture for the person.. even if you drag on this relationship, how long will things work on this way?? Follow your heart.. if you feel divorce is the only option and you will be happier after separation, go for it..
But I wud suggest one thing.. do let know your version of reason ypu opted for separation to his parents.. involve them.. otherwise they may find fault in you and after divorce, may stress their son to get married again.. why spoil another poor lady's life marrying such a guy?? Let them get their son treated..

Sorry if my post has been harsh..

 

Hi Friend,

I can understand your feeling. We will get very upset if our partner doesn't fulfill our wishes esp in this means. But taking divorce is not good idea if you ask me. Seeking a guy for a second marriage is not an easy joke. He should also be understanding and take your previous relationship in good way. But all men are not like that. ur husband is not ready to listen to u also. yes that really sucks. but be patient. time yields everything. Ask him that its big time we need a baby. take to him in that way and see. but think a lot bef going for divorce and bef stepping into a another life. better talk to your parents or his parents. they should be able to help you.

Please be patient and think a lot bef taking a leap.

 

Please don't even think about bringing a baby into this sham marriage.
Find a job and think of a life without him.You can't force people to want you.A sex less marriage with an arrogant insensitive person in not worth it.

 

I think he has some problems. Before confrontation, find a way to stand on your feet instead of depending on him. The start confronting as to why you need sex as part of normal life, and why you can't accept this marriage on a long run.
Threaten him for divorce, and move away from him at least temporarily to understand what he really is upto. But be prepared to take whatever comes your way.

As Nandita said, what is next after divorce? Would you still want this marriage and bury all your sexual needs till your last breath?
Or would you explore a new life (partner) in a legal way, that is after separation/divorce.

Think about it