just venting out

soulhappy · Oct 2, 2014

Dear ILS, You all know about my issues. I am fuming inside as my husband illtreated me too much and I walked on eggshells everyday in these 8 years of marriage. I am very angry with inlaws and relatives as I am from a good family with no issues plus financially wellstable compared to my inlaws plus good background. I should nt have put up with this nonsense. I want them to pay for the torture I faced. I will not give divorce that easily plus will not live with them. They tortured a nice person like me. My husband used all trivial reasons to abuse me to make himself feel good, spit on my face just becoz I put clean clothes on dirty mattress, (the house had nothing to put on, said that he cannot get a house because am a dependent though my parents pay for my expenses, not allow me to drive, didnt help me with exams used to fight with me during exams and swear at me for petty issues but display to others as if he helps me, fantasize about abusing me. Because of him , I got judged and got rude comments from his relatives. Because of domestic violence I failed my exams but they display it as I am not smart and hence I get abused.
Issue is him and he is the rrason -100 percent for failure.
He never asked sorry once even if he asked its because of fear of getting caught. Typical abuser traits
Its because of woman like my MIL and an abuser FIL that my husband is like him
My MIL is a very selfish woman who ruins others life by being manipulative to mask her son's shortcomings.
Its a family of domestic violence history
They act too forward . Infact they are orthodox inside and I understand that they couldnot get a girl from their place as their family history is well known
Men like my husband and his father shouldn't have got married in the first place
They dont have any remorse and they ruin others life and peace of mind..

yellowmango · Oct 2, 2014

You are just abusing yourself further by staying in this miserable state. By not divorcing...you are keeping yourself legally tied to this worthless person .I am sure you know you deserve better. Even if you don't want any more relationships or marriage,a life alone is thousand times better.The best revenge is to live a good life and let his presence on earth not matter to you.

If you have proof you can get justice from the law.There are enough laws that help women.Just staying married to him and stewing in this hatred will harm you more. It will destroy your present and your future.

Look ahead. What is past is past. Don't let him ruin your future.....through this hatred.

dsmenon · Oct 2, 2014

I totally agree with YM here. Leave him, and live/enjoy your life. That would be the best revenge.

JustLikeYou · Oct 2, 2014

The best revenge is to have a fabulous life without being married to him......

Few years down the line you should have forgotten him 100%

Emarald · Oct 2, 2014

Dear Sadwomen I didn't read all your posts but I understand you are in abusive marriage for 8 years, no kids. What is stoppping you from divorcing him? Why can't you go back to your parents and start new life?

soulhappy · Oct 3, 2014

Thank you friends. I understand that am dwelling in the past and had to go counselling to heal myself. I want my husband to heal himself so he will not ruin others peace of mind.. only God has to help

Plz close this thread. I understand that it has to do with my mind. I am abusing myself replaying the events..